porn I found on my gf's laptop

[jsx730]

what about if he got off thinking of someone real? is it different?

& why cant he get off thinking of YOU when youre away?

 

So what if your partner is fantasizing about someone real? There is a VERY large difference between fantasizing and ACTING on a fantasy.

 

I fail to see how controlling what your partner thinks about in HIS/HER MIND is going to benefit a relationship.

[Siriana]

Have you ever watched porn?

[pinkelephant]

Opinions like this make me bang my head against a wall.

 

Not to be mean, or insensitive, but...

 

this kind of thinking is just self destructive and immature.

 

Porn is not cheating anymore then fantasizing about a celebrity.

 

The more "laws" or "restrictions" you put on a relationship, the more chance of them being broken, and problems being caused.

 

This is true, about the laws. But it isn't about laying out laws or restriction, it's about why would he feel the need to fantasize about others when he's with me.

 

I think if he feels that there's something missing in our relationship, our relationship needs re-evaluation.

[BornToResist]

If she lets you use her laptop, she isn't hiding anything. It's not like you snuck around and found it behind her back. The more open you are, the better IMO.

 

I'm straight and I prefer female on female porn. My last bf used to watch porn too and he'd bring this type home just for me. It's absolutely nothing to be threatened about. Personally, the oral scenes are the ones that get me going, and the girly ones always concentrate more on that area, so maybe it's the same with her (sorry if that's too much info!).

 

I think it's great that she's such a sexual being and embraces it. Definently talk to her about it though, since this will ease your mind. I'm sure she wouldn't want to offend you or make you uncomfortable, so she'll probably be happy to explain it to you and/or include you.

 

Good luck!

[jsx730]

why would he feel the need to fantasize about others when he's with me.

 

Because he's human, and chances are there isn't a single person out there that can fill every last need/desire he has. Thinking about other's doesn't mean that what you have must be broken. It just means that variety is a good thing. Things need spiced up.

[amtjrtcet]

This is true, about the laws. But it isn't about laying out laws or restriction, it's about why would he feel the need to fantasize about others when he's with me.

 

I think if he feels that there's something missing in our relationship, our relationship needs re-evaluation.

 

It doesn't always mean that they are watching to fantasize about the pornstars. I personally get turned on by watching porn and then fantasize about my b/f

[wayne]

Porn definitely spiced up our sex life. Not by watching it together. But by me saying "that looks neat. Let me try that the next time we're naked" or "Wow. I didn't know two people could get into that position. Let me try that the next time we're naked".

 

Some of it didn't go over too well. Apparently, not every girl likes her hair pulled during sex. But a lot of it worked amazingly well.

[melrich]

I don't think the content of the videos really says anything about her sexuality. She may be bisexual but what does it matter? My partners bisexual but that has no influence on our relationship whatsoever.

 

How you feel about her watching porn is a personal thing. If it were me I'd have no issues and probably would even raise it with her.

 

Just BTW, if the videos have been there since 2005 how are you sure she is the one who down loaded them?

[freedom]

good grief!! Make a statemtn!

 

"i accidentially found porn on you omputer, i think it would be sexy to watch it together and try some new positions"

 

Make a bold statement that you are willing to do that with her. Yes you are gong out on a limb but you are a man. It is your job.

[SherriLi]

I'm sure that you have nothing to worry about. I watch girl on girl porn hell, i watch guy on guy porn. and i'm not a lesbian, or have ever had sex with another female.

Woman are sexy! It's a turn on to see 2 women together, also, just man on woman straight sex gets alittle boring at times, we all need change..

 

Has she ever expressed interest in women outside of porn?

[Momene]

Maybe she wanted to share it with you!?