Gone for Good?

[inquisitivesharon]

After communicating daily w/a guy online for two weeks, we finally made plans to get together this weekend for dinner. He took me to a nice restaurant and picked up the tab. The conversation flowed nicely and the date lasted more than 2.5 hours. I thanked him and told him that I had a nice time and he said, "Let's talk after I get back from vacation?" - he's leaving on Thursday for a four-day trip.

 

The next afternoon, I sent him a quick, two line e-mail that said "Thanks for dinner - hope you have a great trip."

 

He never responded...yet in our communication the previous two weeks he has responded w/in two hours of each e-mail and has been able to e-mail at various times throughout the day. Granted, I didn't ask him a question, but I figure that if he was interested in another date, he would have responded with a, "me too, call you when I get back."

 

Do you think he's not interested in a second date? I may be overly sensitive but I just got the disappearing act this summer from my boyfriend of 6 months.

[Closure]

This is a real shame, wait for him to contact you now, I really hope he does!

[arwen]

I'd wait a bit. Things can really be crazy prior to making a trip, and it was just a first date. Try not to focus on it too much.

 

Ilse

[iceman85]

Yeah wait for him to contact you, I mean he may have gotten busy before his trip, even though its probably going to drive you nuts you really shouldnt let it phase you that badly.

[ducky]

He doesn't want to appear too desperate. If I knew a girl was reciprocating my interest, the last thing I would want to do is to come in too hard on her and scare her off.

[friscodj]

He's gone, that's my guess.

[sparkle1]

Sorry to say it, but i wouldn't wait. If he liked you after meeting you - he would have made it clear, and would have contacted you sooner then this.

 

Meeting people that you've talked to online sucks you in. You get emotions and feelings for that person...and you want it to work out soooo badly, i can imagine its a real knock if he doesn't want you after.

 

I'm saying what i think - and i hope i don't upset you - and i hope he does make contact and you prove me wrong...it would be great. X

[Closure]

Mine too but then the inbox might have an email in it in the morning.

 

He's gone, that's my guess.

[Entomon]

Yup! He's a goner. The "Let's talk after I get back from vacation?" is a classic escape line. Who knows how many times I've heard that line before.

 

Don't dwell too much on it. As much as things flowed smoothly between the two of you, he wasn't sincere enough in acknowledging your last email thanking him and wishing him a safe trip. And trust me; you're wasting energy pondering the whys because he could care less.

 

I hope you'll let this pass and move on. Because you deserve so much more respect than that.

[zer0effect]

It is possible that he is going away and is caught up in other things, but I wouldn't pin my hopes on it. Personally, I would reccommend not communicating much by email before you get together on a date. If you meet someone online, talk on the phone right away and setup a date to meet, don't email back and forth too much. After the date, then you can start communicating more. You want to do it in person, face to face, less over the phone and even less over email. That way you aren't tied up into things if it doesn't get off the ground and you didn't pour your heart out or got your hopes up.

 

And Sun Kissed, I can't believe you have heard that line many times before, your pic is very cute.

[Entomon]

And Sun Kissed, I can't believe you have heard that line many times before, your pic is very cute.

 

It's very true. I have no problem reeling in the men but keeping them is a whole different ball game. I don't know if it's my personality, I'm too aggressive or what? Men tell me I'm intelligent, fun to be with, can hold a decent conversation and somewhat sexy but then how come I'm never a keeper?

 

And I've always been curious but never dared to ask. What exactly is a man saying when he compliments a woman as "cute", "pretty" or "beautiful"? Or even "hot"? "Sexy"?

[bighair]

hi sharon:

 

this happened to me when i started on line dating. i went out w. a guy and we hit it off...talked for hours. (didn't do a lot of on line chatting) he was in the process of opening a new business and the grand opening was later that week. the monday after our sat night date, i emailed and said good luck w. grand opening. he never responded to that and i he never called me for a second date....by the way, we went out nearly 6 weeks ago.

 

you just don't know w. people, what's going on in their lives.....also, 2 weeks on line chatting is just too long...please see my previous post entitled "i know you guys aren't mindreaders..." i chatted far too long w. a guy and it just didn't pan out.

 

good luck..and dont' take this personally...you'll meet someone else.

[inquisitivesharon]

I got an e-mail from him this afternoon saying he had a nice time, but just didn't feel the chemistry. I'm bummed, but I appreciated his honesty.

[bighair]

well, that's ok. just move on. you'll have chemistry w. someone else. yeah...at least he was honest with you..no need to speculate. anyway, don't take it personally...

 

like i said, chemistry might take time to develop...that instant click people are fond of talking about...just don't know about that.