help

[avman]

avman: i agree entirely with your most recent statement but i also see a distinction between encouragement and empathy.

 

Absolutely correct and right in line with the point I've been making all along.

[helpme2]

Woke up today, not doing much better, my husband says I have to go to the doctor Monday, or possibly to the ER if I don't get better soon, he is afraid I will hurt myself. I don't think he understands the line between cutting and being suicidal. I told him I wouldn't cut anymore, but I don't blame him for not believing, he knows that while I think I have control over it, it's possible to lose control (he also says it's like his dad's alcoholism, where he has been sober for 15 years and can have a beer, but really shouldn't at ALL because of the inherent danger)

 

I am kinda angry at him today, and angry at myself, and angry at myself for being angry at him...

[avman]

Don't be angry with your husband. He has read the situation correctly. You aren't doing much better, so help would be in order. It is likely he knows that you aren't suicidal, but still the situation that you are in that is driving you to cut is a serious issue. You are under extreme stress and it is manifesting itself in you as needing to cut. That is what requires the doctor visit.

 

Telling your husband you won't cut isn't resolving the issue. You still feel rotten because you haven't solved the stress problem. Let your husband help you to help yourself.

[annie24]

Woke up today, not doing much better, my husband says I have to go to the doctor Monday, or possibly to the ER if I don't get better soon, he is afraid I will hurt myself. I don't think he understands the line between cutting and being suicidal. I told him I wouldn't cut anymore, but I don't blame him for not believing, he knows that while I think I have control over it, it's possible to lose control (he also says it's like his dad's alcoholism, where he has been sober for 15 years and can have a beer, but really shouldn't at ALL because of the inherent danger)

 

I am kinda angry at him today, and angry at myself, and angry at myself for being angry at him...

 

maybe not the ER, but definitely make an appointment with the psychiatrist. They can help you out a lot! They can not only help you figure out the root of your anger, but also maybe give you some meds that can help you stop.

 

good luck

[justpaisley]

Don't go to the ER. I went once when I felt like cutting, thinking that I could have an immediate psychological assessment that way. 4 hours in the waiting room later, I still hadn't seen the triage nurse, and the feeling had passed and I was just tired.

 

Definitely seek professional help (your GP may send you to a psychologist), but don't go to the ER for it.

[helpme2]

I got a call into my therapist, she says that I probably did the only thing I could do at the time (I don't know what she means by that) she says we are the very best people we can be under the current circumstances and that I had a bad day, made a bad choice and feel bad about it, and that's all normal........she wants to see me Monday, this weekend I am supposed to write down every single thing that's going on right now, good, bad, or otherwise. I am confused as to what the purpose of this is, but her cell phone cut out and she won't be able to talk to me again until Monday (she is out of town) she did give me the number of another counselor but he has no clue why she said any of that either and basically told me I am weak and that I screwed up big time........I don't understand.

[annie24]

I got a call into my therapist, she says that I probably did the only thing I could do at the time (I don't know what she means by that) she says we are the very best people we can be under the current circumstances and that I had a bad day, made a bad choice and feel bad about it, and that's all normal

 

I think she means that she knows you were going through a hard time and you reacted by doing something familiar that used to make you feel better at times (cutting).

 

........she wants to see me Monday, this weekend I am supposed to write down every single thing that's going on right now, good, bad, or otherwise. I am confused as to what the purpose of this is, but her cell phone cut out and she won't be able to talk to me again until Monday (she is out of town)

 

I think she wants to know and help you see exactly what emotions/feelings/happenings/thoughts you had right before the cutting, during the cutting, and after the cutting. maybe once you have things down in black and white, you can see what triggered the cutting episode and how those issues can be addressed in a healthier manner.

 

she did give me the number of another counselor but he has no clue why she said any of that either and basically told me I am weak and that I screwed up big time........I don't understand.

 

is this what he said, word for word?

[helpme2]

is this what he said, word for word?

word for word he said "cutting is something people do when they can't handle life like adults, you were okay, now you are back where you started, was all the work worth a single moment of weakness? you really messed up this time, if you were my patient I would be very disappointed.

[annie24]

YIKES!!!! he doesn't sound like a very good counselor!!!!!! I think he needs a dose of empathy!

 

forget him, some people and some counselors just don't jive. some people have a very "tough love" approach.

 

anyways, time to get back on track again.

 

don't let this get you down.

[Managor]

Wow, a psychologist who puts down his patients and tries to make them feel guilty O___o

[avman]

she did give me the number of another counselor but he has no clue why she said any of that either and basically told me I am weak and that I screwed up big time........I don't understand.

 

Tell your therapist exactly what that counselor told you. The guy ought to lose his license.

 

Don't ever call him again. He's an idiot. Stick with your main therapist. She at least seems to understand the situation and you two have built a professional relationship.

[justpaisley]

Writing down everything you're going through and your reactions and feelings may seem like a waste of time, but it winds up being very cathartic. It's also another one of those distractions I was telling you about. It definitely works.

 

And that second therapist was a fool, you should definitely tell your therapist what he said. That guy shouldn't talk to people.

[annie24]

I also agree, tell your main therapist what this guy said. that should be noted on his record that he said something so awful and mean and not helpful at all!

[helpme2]

So, I wanted to check in tell you guys I am doing better. My therapist and I figured out my problem, I am a control freak, which may or may not be a bad thing from the get-go, but I was stressing about things I have no control over. It's a sad life when you are running around trying to fix things you can't fix, and change things you can't change and then telling yourself you are bad because everything is the same and still broken.

 

I made a list of things I have control over, and I am working on those things, everything else is I guess up to God.

 

I feel a lot better now than I did last week.

[Managor]

Great to hear that you're feeling better! Keep us updated ^__^

[nottoogreen]

Just found this thread.

 

Venting is not much use.

 

Just read it before you do anything to yourself

My life/Poem

Prolonged depression and AD, unmeetable expectations

Suicidal thoughts

 

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