Think I may still be a virgin

[Yvette84]

yeah, it is intimate and yes it's sexual, but McgyverRI is right, sex is PENIS in VAGINA!! that is just common sense.

[doyathink]

Holy cow! I can see why Budman threw up his arms and left the thread. I, personaly think that 'oral' is a form of foreplay and that unless you have had a penis in your va-j-j, than you are still a virgin. What, so some consider getting fingered a loss of virginity too? You can catch STD's from kissing ( genital warts for one) so I don't think that constitutes whether or not it is considered sex, just cause you can catch a disease from it.

 

Intimacy is a whole other ball game. That can be holding hands, kissing, a stroll through the park but I have never heard that it is sex, it just usually goes with it.

[mushroom1129]

ok, now why did this thread get into why she married so young (which isn't true) and why are we defining the terms of virginity?

 

to answer your question, its safe to say his penis HAS gone in there. sometimes you can hurt it can be a lubrication problem or whatever. just work with it and you'll find a solution. if not, see a doctor about it.

[sophie274]

To the OP:

 

I think you've only ever had sex about 5-10 times, is that correct? I could DEFINITELY feel it my first time, I mean, there's no way I could not have been sure that something was going into my vagina. You could stick your finger in and see if the sensation feels new or if it feels somewhat like the sensation of penetration.

 

I think you probably did have intercourse though. Not sure if you were using condoms, but your husband probably would also have known if he wasn't in you.

 

Sex/fingering can hurt even after the first time, depending on your lubrication, how rough he is, some infections, and so on.

[SheWolf]

[quote=

 

Soreness might occur if you're not lubricated enough; the burning sensation, if its not the sensation of skin-on-skin might indicate an STD. I would consider checking it with your physician just to be on the safe-side.

.

 

We are both clean, and it only burns when he sticks his finger inside or when he pulls it out because I'm extreamly tight.

[SheWolf]

Let me clarify, I meant I don't think my hymen broke, that's why I asked if I could still be a virgin.

[sophie274]

I guess it's possible for the hymen not to break when you have sex (although likely after a couple of times it will).

 

Are you still a virgin? Depends on your definition of virginity.

 

If you think having/not having a hymen makes you a virgin/not a virgin, then yes by that standard you could still be a virgin.

 

If you think virgin is no penetration by a penis, then no.

 

If you think virgin is no fingering/oral sex, then no.

 

My personal definition is that of intercourse, which I think might be the most common one, but many people have their own particular virginity standard.

[SheWolf]

My definition was broken hymen equals not virgin, but honestly all that aside is it normal to be so darn tight down there, I'm so tight that my husband can barely put one finger in me and it hurts really bad when he takes it out or moves it around. Is there any way aside from having a baby or surgery that I can loosen up so that I could enjoy it more.

[MacGyverRI]

We are both clean, and it only burns when he sticks his finger inside or when he pulls it out because I'm extreamly tight.

 

 

That would hurt, as in a lot of pain or discomfort, but not burn.

 

Does it burn when either of you pee? especially him as Chlamydia is usually symptom free in 95% of women and 20% of men and as such is called "the silent STD. It has been rampant for many many yrs. because of that fact. Easy to cure w/ zithromycin or a 7-day course of doxycycline.

 

A nasty yeast infection (Candidsis) can also cause it and he will get the worst case of "jock itch" in less than 3 days, Jock itch sprays cure it fast for guys, girls usually need Flagyll (metronidazole).

 

Please see a Doctor if either is the case.

[itsallgrand]

Are you getting aroused enough before actual penetration? Lots of foreplay, where you feel very ready and hot? That might help. I find that the hornier I am, the longer I have to wait, the more teasing...the more relaxed my muscles become.

 

Also, perhaps you don't produce a lot of natural lubrication. 'wetness factor'. It varies amongst women, so you might try a store-bought lubrication. And take it slow.

 

Finally, the burning? Is it possible you may have a yeast infection or something medical happening?

 

take care

[alteer]

How would you know if your hymen is broken or not!!!

 

There could be a ton of reasons for painful sex. If it's just because your tight and really nervous then it's going to be extremely difficult.

 

My advice......get yourself a dildo and plenty of lube.......that way you can ease yourself into it on your own.

[MacGyverRI]

My definition was broken hymen equals not virgin, but honestly all that aside is it normal to be so darn tight down there, I'm so tight that my husband can barely put one finger in me and it hurts really bad when he takes it out or moves it around. Is there any way aside from having a baby or surgery that I can loosen up so that I could enjoy it more.

 

 

Lots more foreplay, more fingers outside, circular motion around the vulva and clitoris and less finger inside and you will dialate more.

[SheWolf]

That would hurt, as in a lot of pain or discomfort, but not burn.

 

Does it burn when either of you pee? especially him as Chlamydia is usually symptom free in 95% of women and 20% of men and as such is called "the silent STD. It has been rampant for many many yrs. because of that fact. Easy to cure w/ zithromycin or a 7-day course of doxycycline.

 

A nasty yeast infection (Candidsis) can also cause it and he will get the worst case of "jock itch" in less than 3 days, Jock itch sprays cure it fast for guys, girls usually need Flagyll (metronidazole).

 

Please see a Doctor if either is the case.

 

Alright maybe the pain isn't a burning sensation but I don't know how else to describe it. No, it doesn't hurt when we use the restroom. It's more of a feeling when a fingernail scrapes skin, It's just I'm really tight and his finger moving around and pulling out creates a lot of pain.

[yeawutever]

The hymen can be broken by many factors. What if you never had any type of sex wutsoever and the hymen got broken through activites, even masturbation, then does that mean you're not a virgin!!!

[MacGyverRI]

Alright maybe the pain isn't a burning sensation but I don't know how else to describe it. No, it doesn't hurt when we use the restroom. It's more of a feeling when a fingernail scrapes skin, It's just I'm really tight and his finger moving around and pulling out creates a lot of pain.

 

 

Have you ever seen a Gynecologist?

 

If yes, how did they get the Spectulm in?

[SheWolf]

I've only went to a gyno once and i was in middle school.

[alteer]

Alright maybe the pain isn't a burning sensation but I don't know how else to describe it. No, it doesn't hurt when we use the restroom. It's more of a feeling when a fingernail scrapes skin, It's just I'm really tight and his finger moving around and pulling out creates a lot of pain.

 

Due you use lubricant? I tend to think that your just not wet enough and I'll tell you why.

 

Even when I'm really horny I don't get that wet naturally so have to use lube, without it there is no way anyone's getting in there. Even with just a finger if you are not wet enough then you are going to be in pain.

 

I think you need to learn to relax your muscles and use lots of lubricant until you are comfortable.

[yeawutever]

Ok, no need to get so defensive, I'm just making a statement about what I considered is the meaning the "SEX", did take a sex class two semesters ago, but yea nothing comparing as actually experiencing it and then finally making your own assumptions.

 

Last thing, this is not really an essay for English class nor will you expect everyone to agree on what you may think.

 

 

 

[MacGyverRI]

I've only went to a gyno once and i was in middle school.

 

You probably should make an appt. and get a general Gyno checkup again.

At least one visit yearly is recommended.

 

KY jelly and other water based lubricants could help.

[monkey1]

You probably should make an appt. and get a general Gyno checkup again.

At least one visit yearly is recommended.

 

KY jelly and other water based lubricants could help.

 

Ditto. Now that you're being sexually active and you're over the age of 18, you should get a pap smear annually. Find a gyno in your area, or you can go to your primary doctor and get it there. Many family doctors do pap smears, that's what I do. At least you can get yourself checked out and then talk to them about your sexual activity and how to make it a more pleasureable experience, rather than painful.