What to do.. young and in college...

[hrwdea]

As of right now I third year college and I need advice. My father owns a successful practise and I am working for him. I am also in school studying his field. Here is the problem... I dont like who my father is... His personality, how stessed he is, both at home and at work, and how he never seems to be happy or enjoying himself. He is so serious. I basically have it made and can follow in his footsteps after I graduate but I really do not want to turn out to be him. Him and my mother do not have a good relationship and he works very hard at work. I always tell him he needs to relax and enjoy his hard work but he never does. For example he was working today on a saturday (by choice) and comes home and started yelling about how his back hurt and how much work has to be done around the house. It seems he is always complaining, and I do not find those types of people very attractive... I dont want to be like him when I grow up. I think it is a good thing though that I have notised his negative traits. But also being around him so much I am afriad his personality will rub off on me. I feel as though I need to get away from him. I really do not know what to do...

[hrwdea]

Also I want to add, that I was offered a summer job, for less money then my dads place to help handicap children. I think it would be a good experience and can meet some ppl that are actually my age at work.

 

This would mean I would quit my dads work which I am sure would not go over well. People always tell me at my current work how good of a experience this is for me and how lucky I am... I just dont know?

[SilverManic]

Can you not speak to your father about this? I would by all means avoid that you don't want to be like him etc. This is not going to make him a happy bunny. I surgest you tell him that you were offered a summer job and that allthough you really do apreciate that he has made a place for you in his work and that it is a good experience.

But explain that so is this other place and that you would like to try something outside the family. Explain to him that it's a summer job. For crying out loud try not to seem ungrateful about the job that he has given you because there is nothing that irratates parents more!

Take care and good luck,

~S.

[Jorus Cbaoth]

You can have the same job as your father, but be a different person. It's how you handle stress, and whether you take that home with you or not. If you don't believe me, look at other rewarding but highly stressful jobs. Some doctors love what they do, while others let stress eat them away. Some police officers love their job, others can't handle it. It's the hallmark of a rewarding career.

 

 

(( Just out of curiosity, what do you do anyway? ))

[moink75]

Remember, you are not your dad. We all have different life experiences and it is throught these experiences that we grow. You see how your dad is living and you do not want that. That is fine, you can make your own choices. You can change how you live your life. Just because you do the same job does not mean you will turn into that other person known as your dad.

[Tigris]

Why don't you ask your mother for advice on the summer job. She'll know how to deal with your father better than we do.

 

Good luck

[fd4life]

ok i hope this helps........

 

work is work and personal life is axactly that. i personally do my very best not to bring work home with me. no matter how stressful or irritating it may be. my paying job really aint that stressful but the volunteer work that i do, which is basically a second job, but unfortunately i do see and experience some things that weigh heavy on my mind. but you have to do your best to keep personal and work life separate. now your dilema to quit your current job or not is a difficult decision. there are a few things that you have to consider. 1. what do YOU want to do? 2. would taking this other job mean that your current job with dad will be gone forever? like silver said speak to your father BEFORE you make a decision. let him know the oppurtunity you have and how it will help you or may make you a better person. and as said by silver show him you are grateful for the opertunity he gave you. i know personally, my parents want me to do whatever i feel makes me happy. thats why i have chosen what i do. my parents are supportive to no end. so who knows, maybe if you discuss this with your father he may support you 100% in whatever you choose. and 3. look towards your future!!!!! that is important. if there is a future in one job and no future in the other you may want to weigh your options and think about this one before jumping to a conclusion. what your father has done and what he does may not be for you. i dont know if any of this helped or wether i just wasted my time typing this, but thats my 2 cents. i hope you make the right decision, as hard as it may be, it is YOUR decision.