Kissing without being turned on!?!?!?!?!

[Yvette84]

Ok.....So I have been talking to this guy on the net for about a month,(we talk ALOT) anyways, it's a long distance thing so we have only hung out two days so far, well he kissed me last night for the first time!!! it's like it went from NO affection......to him totally going for it!!! it wasn't slow or roamtic, it was quick and intense!! we ended up making out for a while....the problem is.....I didn't feel turned on!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (this never happens with guys I like!!) I don't get why!?!?!? I am attratced to him, I like him, so what's the deal????? I'm thinking cause maybe I couldn't really get into it because it was soooo sudden and caught me off guard!?! or maybe I didn't like the way he kised?!?! I dunno!!! can anyone explain this to me!?!?!?!

[Sylph]

Well nerves usually makes sure you completely fail to get turned on.

 

Then again the fact that there was no build up could equate for that.

 

And you're the one who has to tell us how good a kisser a was.

[Yvette84]

Well nerves usually makes sure you completely fail to get turned on.

 

Then again the fact that there was no build up could equate for that.

 

And you're the one who has to tell us how good a kisser a was.

I've been nervous before and the kisses were awesome! and I have been caught off guard before too...hhmm.....he was too fast and all over the place....wasn't enjoyable. but I still think I should've felt a "spark" right???

[Sylph]

Mmm, I guess. But I wouldn't put too much emphasis on it.

 

As I said having no build up probably wasn't great, he could be the love of your life but if he just jumps right in there with no warning then I wouldn't be surprised if it wasn't that enjoyable for you. All I can suggest is that you try again, just don't let him go full steam ahead.

[Steven1607307306]

Being caught off guard would can go either way. For some girls being caught off guard is very lusty and intense, but then again for others it may be a little awkward. Were you thinking about how fast it started while making out? Just try and get your mind off of it and live in the moment.

[Goodfun88]

Well that could possibly be a sign of no chemistry. Thats not good. But maybe you just need to kiss a few more times and see how it goes. The first couple of times I kissed my current bf, it wasn't great, but now when I do, its amazing. So try a few more times, if there is still no chemistry, maybe he's better off as a friend. Good luck!

[Süsser Tod]

Well that could possibly be a sign of no chemistry. Thats not good. But maybe you just need to kiss a few more times and see how it goes. The first couple of times I kissed my current bf, it wasn't great, but now when I do, its amazing. So try a few more times, if there is still no chemistry, maybe he's better off as a friend. Good luck!

 

 

Well, first time I kissed my gf it was amazing! We spent hours kissing that day, and my tongue was seriously sore the day after that!

 

And she was the one who did it, totaly took me off guard.

[AntiLove_SuperStar]

Give it another shot, everyone deserves more than one chance, right?

[monkey1]

You know, I had a similiar problem with my boyfriend. We had met online and we had met once just as friends getting to know each other. Then he came out so we could give it a shot as being more than friends. Mind you, I had only kissed one guy before him and that was awkward and weird.

 

When he got off the plane and met me, he shoved his tongue down my throat in an attempt to passionately kiss me like we had been wanting to for months. And I was so not turned on and I backed away. It freaked me out and overwhelemed me.

 

It kind of worried him because he later told me he thought that I didn't like him kissing me. And it wasn't that, it's just that I wanted to take much slower and not jump into a makeout session. He was also my first boyfriend so the last thing I wanted to do is rush everything, even though I know he wanted to jump my pants right there and shove his tongue down my throat.

 

What I really wanted was a nice, meaningful long kiss when I first met my boyfriend. But I was caught off guard. All I needed to do was just tell him that I wasn't ready to jump into a makeout session everytime we kissed and I wanted to take it much slower. He got the message and things were better after that.

 

If you really are attracted and enjoy this guy, I'd talk to him and tell him maybe you want to take it slow. I think jumping into a makeout session right off the bat doesn't have the same impact as a slow, nice kiss when you've been talking to someone for a long time who you are both mentally and physically attracted to.

 

So don't stress, just take it slower and hopefully you'll feel that spark you're looking for. Or better yet, give him a kiss to show him how you want to be kissed.