how long should i wait before 2nd date?

[dylan saves]

i had a nice date with a girl on sunday afternoon.

it is now wednesday night, and i'd like to see what she's up to.

i'm afraid calling too soon might make me seem desperate.

what's the word on the board?

[crvers]

well I don't know about the board, but waiting 4 days is probably good enough. If she had a good time on sunday, then calling yesturday would've been fine. I'd say go for it.

[iceberg21]

Sunday to wednesday is perfect timing. You don't want to wait any longer or you may appear uninterested. This is definetly not too soon to call her. Definetly don't hesitate. You've given it enough time so as not to appear desperate or obsessed or anything, but now you run the risk of appearing uninterested. I say go to it.

[Tigris]

I agree phone her and ask her out for the weekend.

 

Good luck

[dylan saves]

thanks for the quick replies.

random strangers give the best advice.

[DN]

I never agree with this 'rule' of waiting to call so you don't appear too interested. Suppose she has a 'rule' that if the guy doesn't call within 48 hours she won't go out with him again?

 

Or suppose somebody else asks her out while you are waiting?

 

Call her up and ask her out.

[iceberg21]

I never agree with this 'rule' of waiting to call so you don't appear too interested. Suppose she has a 'rule' that if the guy doesn't call within 48 hours she won't go out with him again?

 

Or suppose somebody else asks her out while you are waiting?

 

Call her up and ask her out.

 

Fair enough, but you could drive yourself crazy with questions like that. Do you call her every day to make sure nobody has asked her out since the date? Obviously that would be pretty ridiculous, but how else do you know? What if she had another date later that nite? I don't mean to be a jacka$$, but you can't go thinking like that. Not only does it scream INSECURE, but like I said, you'd go crazy.

[annie24]

I never agree with this 'rule' of waiting to call so you don't appear too interested. Suppose she has a 'rule' that if the guy doesn't call within 48 hours she won't go out with him again?

 

Or suppose somebody else asks her out while you are waiting?

 

Call her up and ask her out.

 

A guy didn't call me within 48 hours of our first date. He didn't call or write to say that he had a good time. I've written him off.

 

Most guys call right after the first date or the day after to say that they had a good time. If they don't, I just figure they're not interested and move on.

[Omni-I]

A guy didn't call me within 48 hours of our first date. He didn't call or write to say that he had a good time. I've written him off.

 

Most guys call right after the first date or the day after to say that they had a good time. If they don't, I just figure they're not interested and move on.

 

 

You know what? just do what you feel like doing. If you just wanna call her and talk to her, just do it. Life too short to hang around people who missreads you by thinking your desperate. Beside there is a market to buy off women...to make them yours if that doesnt work! LOL (man i am gonna get hang for this )

[DN]

Fair enough, but you could drive yourself crazy with questions like that. Do you call her every day to make sure nobody has asked her out since the date? Obviously that would be pretty ridiculous, but how else do you know? What if she had another date later that nite? I don't mean to be a jacka$$, but you can't go thinking like that. Not only does it scream INSECURE, but like I said, you'd go crazy.

 

My point is that to wait until you feel you don't look desperate or over-eager can backfire. I don't see any problem in letting a girl know you are interested early. Most would find it flattering.

 

But - there is also no reason why a girl can't call a guy after a date and thank him for a great time - especially if he paid. No reason she can't offer to take him out somewhere either. The guy should not have to do all the pursing and paying these days.

[Mjane]

My boyfriend asked me out at the end of every date. Or he'd make plans to call me when he knew I was free to make a date.

I never thought him desperate. I assumed he knew what he wanted and was going after it. Me.

It's been 2.5 months and he still does this.