Running out of patience...

[Pikey1972]

Hello there folks, hope you're all well.

 

Well, it's been a while since I last visited this forum - I'm still trying to sort out the cobwebs of my mind!

 

So, after 3 months of LC and trying to stay friends with my ex, I've finally decided to move on and go NC (famous last words...;-)) After repeatedly phoning and e-mailing me and then going "stone cold" whenever I reply, my ex promised to phone last night. And did he? Of course he didn't! The swine...

 

So I've decided enough is enough: no more wondering why he keeps ringing yet doesn't reply to my e-mails, no more hoping that he'll come crawling back to me, no more trying to analyse his actions. It's been driving me round the bend and it has to stop.

 

He left his jacket at my house a few weekends ago and hasn't collected it, so the plan is to leave it in his mailbox with a brief note saying "take care, all the best for the future".

 

I've been debating whether to tell him about the NC, but after all his silences I no longer care. All I want is to feel well again and move on with my life.

 

Anyways, just venting my spleen there!

 

Take care y'all, I'll post again soon.

[Pikey1972]

Oops, when I say "phoning", I mean he phones and leaves an answerphone message, but then doesn't reply when I leave a message in return.

 

Not sure if that's playing mind games or not, but it's certainly driving me up the wall!

 

AARGH!

[ocrob]

Good Job! It is so hard to stay friends with an ex right away. The hope in your heart just eats away at you. Going NC will help you heal and will open up new opportunities for you. Good luck!

[RayKay]

Sounds like the right thing to do...it takes two to make a friendship work too, and it takes even more work after you have broken off a romantic relationship. If he is not offering that, there is no real point...it will only drag the pain along.

 

I would not even tell him. Just don't answer his calls, delete his emails without reading them, sending him the jacket....he'll get it and hopefully connect the dots (even swine can figure that out ).

 

You will feel better as time goes on, making the choice to move on is a true turnaround point.

[curlygirl47]

Isn't it funny how these exes want to keep a little something to connect them to us? My ex keeps "forgetting" to put the storage key to a shed we share (which is behind my home) back where it belongs, in a neutral place where we can both use it without having to contact each other. So, now I need it, and he has it, even though he isn't using it. The only reason he needs it at this point is to move his stuff out, which he is apparently not in any hurry to do.

 

I've had No Contact since Monday morning, when the ex called at 2:56 a.m. and wanted to come over. Then he actually went to the house and saw I wasn't there and called again, asking me to call him back. I didn't get the message til later because I wasn't home (I had spent the night at a friends). I responded with a letter that more or less let him know I would be doing my own thing and if he wants to see me, he can call but I wouldn't be calling him. So even though I want that storage key, I'm going to just let it ride for a while, and ask him for the key when he contacts me eventually.

[RayKay]

curly - Call a locksmith and have them break in and then you can just replace the lock. It's your house, there should be no issue.

 

If you need your stuff you need your stuff. Put the new key where it should be and he can figure it out on his own.

[curlygirl47]

I'll do that. It's another way of balancing the power a little bit. Thanks for your advice.