Me and Him

[Erk]

Well, to start things off, I am bisexual. I have recently told my parents, they were devastated, and now things are much better. I really love this one guy--my dad has told me that I cannot be intimate with him in anyway, but I am actually going to do it, just at the right times.

 

Well, he was over at my friends house one day, and we were chatting on msn. My friend knows that I am bi and that I was in love with him. I understand what love is, I know the feeling. I really do love him so much. My friend asked me if he should know that I liked him. She texted me what she meant, and he took the cell phone and read it. He said he didn't care in msn. Then next morning he confessed to me that he was bi too, in an email. He told me that he really liked me too. Ever since then, in school, we haven't shown any clues or feelings, we have to hide them. I wish I could just hug him, but I don't know how to approach him. After having told our feelings for eachother, we can't express them unless we are like texting.

 

I feel so upset, because we never show eachother our love, and we are just so shy with expressing it. What should I do?

[ShySoul]

It's ok to be shy and nervous about expressing your feelings in public. As your dad demonstrated, there are still plenty of people who are not comfortable with the idea of someone being gay or bi. This can lead people who are to great discomfort, feeling like they have to hide a part of themselves for fear of how people will react and treat them.

 

Where do you live? Is it in an area where this stuff is tolerated more or still feared?

 

I want to tell you to just express how you feel about each other. But if either one of you isn't ready, then its not a good idea. You need to express these feelings to your partner and work something out. Do what is best for both of you.

 

Wish you well and hope things work out.

[Erk]

I have told most of my friends, and they are okay with it. I live in Maryland, and in the school that I am in, there isn't really that many people who have a problem with it, although there are some.

 

basically, one of us has to make the first move, I would think..and he is not as openly bi as I am, so I have to pick a good moment.

[ShySoul]

In that case I would make the first move, but make it small like holding hands. He is going to be nervous and you want him to feel comfortable with what you are doing. And I wish you and him a good, long relationship.

[Erk]

Okay, I think I know what I'll do now. Thanks ^_^

[Liquid Dream]

I think thats great that you're not ashamed of your sexually,

and as for your dad, let him know that you have strength to

love people for who they are, not for their gender

[Erk]

I think thats great that you're not ashamed of your sexually,

and as for your dad, let him know that you have strength to

love people for who they are, not for their gender

 

He knows I do, he says he doesn't like me being with the same** gender and is worried about me getting beaten up or something and will do everything in his power to keep me off of a male. Even change schools or move away.

 

I have had a problem with this in middle school before, just verbal abuse. It happened over something that never happened, and I wasn't out of the closet then. High school is so much fun now, though.

[Liquid Dream]

Your dad needs to know that there is a big world around you,

and that he can't be with you every second, and that when you

grow older you could resent him forever for going against you.

And remember you may only be 14 today, but soon you'll be old

enough to start a life with whom ever you choose, wether he's

going to except it or not

[Erk]

He also understands that, too. (He told me) He says "I may not like it, but I'm going to have to accept it".

 

Ah, and the updates on what has happened so far, I have admitted to him that I was shy and I didn't know how to approach him, and he was in the same way. We went to a friends birthday party on Saturday, and we were playing in the snow. We had a little snowball fight and laughs, and he apologized for being a bit 'obnoxious' approaching with the snow, cause he didn't know how else he could confront me in a 'major' way.

[Liquid Dream]

Thats so cute!