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Anxiety PLEASE go away :(


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Well the guy that I was you can say "seeing" has thrown int he towel and ended everything due to the fact that he wasn't ready for a relationship and I treated him to much as if I was his girl. The way I spoke to him, the gifts I had bought him so on and so forth. He did advise me in the beginning that he didnt want a girlfriend but things went to quick and honestly it took for him to turn the beginning to an end. I was swseeing him for a month in a half and im sooo sad! He hasnt called me in 2 days and I have left him 2 messages and no call back This is not like him. I was thinking of emailing him but my friends said not to. He was so nice and did just want to be friends but im just down. any advise? Should I try calling one more time or leave an email? I feel so lost!! I hate this!!!!

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Hi esboggie, I'm sorry you are going through this.

But the fact is - you did nothing wrong.

He was not ready for a relationship. The only mistake you made was letting yourself get too attached to someone who was not wanting to be in a relationship.

 

No, I don't suggest that you contact him anymore.

Good luck, and stay strong.

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I've learned somethings through similar experiences. If a man tells you they are not ready for a relationship believe their words, they are not ready for a relationship and you will not get one from him. When you have feelings for someone it is very hard not to show it and you're only "mistake" was being ready for what he was not. I do not think you should try to contact him. He probably felt a certain level of emotional involvement (from either end, it doesn't matter) that he doesn't want to deal with at this point in his life and so he is pulling away. Trying to contact him will only make him pull harder.

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I agree, you fell for someone who was ready for what you wanted. You didn't do anything wrong and shouldn't be upset with yourself. This can happen to any of us. We want so badly to believe that the person is ready, he/she just needs to see that we are the one they are waiting for. We get caught in the idea, the fantasy of being with them. But eventually we see that it isn't going to work. It hurts. But it isn't something to get angry at ourselves about. He was the one who wasn't ready, and he'll eventually ask himself why he wasted such a great opportunity.

 

On if you should contact him, how do you want things to go from here? Do you still want to be friends? Or are the feelings going to be to strong? I would contact him one more time just to say you understand, there are no hard feelings, and (if you want) that you hope you can be friends. If he doesn't respond, then forget him because he's not worth the time.

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