Is this classed as self harming

[Jonboy582]

I know there is alot of more deserving cases on here that need to be looked at. But can you class this as self harming. Well some of you may know I was scared my g/f was going to leave me, and I felt I really hurt her so I got rather emotional.

 

I left the hours about half 12 at night and walked round my village, anyway what I was going to say is. That I took my pain and anger out on a holy bush by trying to beat it up. Pretty stupid idea, anyway you can gues I cut up my nuckes and parts of my fingers. Could you class this as self harming is what I was wondering?

[DN]

I don't think so. I am not an expert but I think self-harm is done for different reasons. If you were to keep doing it to relieve mental stress that may be a different matter - but it is no different really that punching a wall in frustration.

[Jonboy582]

okies, well I dont want to start self harming and I thought about it, but well its not the way I know so I wont. Although I must say it did work it turned my emotional pains into physical, and after they been made physical they can recover.

 

(dont anyone take this as advice please dont it not intended that way)

[metallicachica247]

i personaly dont class it as SI because unless you intentionally meant to cut up your knuckles then its not really self harming in a bad way...

[anonymous_presence]

I agree with metallicachica24/7: when it comes to self injury, it's not necessarily the method, it's the mentality that counts. It could be a papercut or a deep knife wound, even compulsively slapping your head, and be SI. Seems like what you did was a way to take out emotion.

 

I'm not sure I agree with what you said about turning emotional pains into physical ones: however effective it may be, it's not necessarily the best way to deal with emotions. Instead of wondering about what you did and dealing with doubts and regret, it's best to talk about these things with her, as you should do with any problems that arise.

 

Hope everything worked out in the end!

[Jonboy582]

thanks cheers, im glad to hear what I did whats not really classed as self harming. But yer I am really messed up at the moment, just so many thoughts going round my head, I am over analising everything and making mountains out of mole hills, I was thinking of seeing a shrink, what would u suggest?

[DN]

If you think one would help , go ahead.

 

You could also try writing down on a piece of paper what you want. Say ten things you would like to achieve over, say, the next 12 months. Then write down how to achieve them - concrete and useful proposals. Do some research, ask for help if you need to, maybe on here.

 

The list can achieve school goals, career goals, friends, relationships. Any of the problems that face you.

 

By doing that you have a clearer understanding of what's bugging you, the priority that they assume on your 'worry meter' and some ideas about how to deal with them.

 

Just classifying concerns and worries can put them into perspective and proportion. And some of them you may realise aren't really important at all. Or that one that you thought was not, is the root cause of many or all of the others.

[anonymous_presence]

If you feel like what you're dealing with emotionally is too much or concerned that there may be an underlying problem, then maybe you should see someone about it. What exactly is bothering you? Are you suddenly confronted by an event that's causing you a lot of stress, and now you're simply reacting to this stressor, which will go away with time? Or are you suddenly acting out of character and you can't identify the source of this change in behavior?

 

If you're leaning more towards the first option, then read about stress coping strategies on the web or buy a book. Like DN said, make a list and prioritize things, and maybe make another list of the things that are troubling you and ways to deal with them. Write in a journal and set aside some time for reflection.

 

Overanalyzing things is not necessarily bad. On the one hand, if you have an upcoming event and you're thinking a great deal about it, then you'll come off more than prepared to deal with it.

 

On the other hand, it can be a huge chunk of unnecessary stress that just leads you to go in circles. I don't know if you have some sort of conflict with someone or if you're regretting things, but regardless, try and make this analysis a period of constructive reflection.

 

Say you're worried about something in the future. It's okay to consider all the possible outcomes of this event, and it's good to consider what you can do to make a favorable outcome ensue. But once you've done that, enough is enough. There's no need to go overboard and go into stress mode. If you have trouble taking your mind off the topic, then occupy yourself with work, physical activity, hobbies, whatever. Just don't think about it too much or else this event will come off as a looming monster.

 

If you're regretting something, do something similar. Identify what you shouldn't have done and think of ways that you can rectify it. I know it's hard to deal with it, but realizing that you've done something wrong is sufficient, and you shouldn't beat yourself up about it. Also consider possible ways to prevent what you did from happening again. If you're feeling shame about something and it's not really something "wrong", then learn to let go of this regret.

 

If you're still worrying too much, then maybe you should consult someone to learn better coping strategies. Hope this helps a little bit!

[Finchabald]

what was your intent? did you intend to hurt?