SAA,cyber/POrn addiction do any men here have it?

[GothicLolita]

Hi,

I'm just curious to speak to anyone here who is either a porn addict or ex porn addict or someone who has dealt with one before.

 

 

I've been with my boyfriend for 1 year and 5 months and he has had emotional affairs both over cyber space and on the phone (phone sex ,local escorts) and i was crushed when i discovered the emails,hotlines and phone bill i went into a frenzy.

 

naturaly...

 

my ex was the same way,but because i love my current boyfriend that much i decided to get to the root of this demon and understood the problem wasn't my own but his hes suffers from Porn addiction (not to be confused with sex addiction) but they was no physical one person..right now after the worst discovery of his affiar we're both working on him staying "clean" i made him change his emails and i deleted his phone sex account and told him this is his last chance..I want to help him get over this so we can grow,if not for us then his future as a good boyfriend.

 

(also we watch porn together we have a very open minded sex life,which i'm fine with its just when he does stuff behind my back or he ignores my needs thats when i become upset )

 

even though i want to trust him i still have low self esteem from what has happened and i need some surport or someone who understands what he or i am going through.

 

where interacial i'm spanish and he's black but i noticed alot of the porn and operators he was looking at where white thinner then me and had D cups and up .and i'm only a B-C and moderately plus sized.because of this i feel less and less wanted by him even though we have a great sex life i feel that i don't pull him in the way those women did physicaly its just i don't know how to recover and feel that i'm not attrative to anyone.

he things he wrote in his emails to those women felt like he was another person.

 

if anyone knows some SAA meetings in northern NJ OR better yet a good hotline to call,and if you have any stories to share please let me know. thanks.

[shes2smart]

Try this website. There are many others there dealing with the same issue.

 

main page of site: link removed

 

message board: link removed

[Minty80]

I found this for you...

 

Sunday 7:00 PM - Hoboken SAA

Type: Mixed/Closed (

click here for explanation)

Location: Hoboken Evangelical Free Church (Downstairs Entrance), 833 Clinton St

For information call Dave L. at 201-459-8858

Or contact Jose P. at 201-563-0456

For email write Dave l. at email removed

Or write Jose P. at email removed

 

The problem is Mixed/Closed means it's only for those who are actually sex addicts. Maybe not so great for you but could be a good resource for your boyfriend and it's pretty darn close to you (I'm in northern NJ as well).

 

Maybe you could try e-mailing and ask if they have any resources available that could help you?

 

O/NS Wednesday Jersey City (7:00) St. Paul's Episcopal

 

Church, 38 Duncan Ave.

 

That's an al-anon open meeting. While your problem isn't alcohol addiction, it IS an addiction and an open al-anon meeting might be a good thing for you.

 

I hope some of these helps. Oh and as far as comparing yourself to the girls in porn, I'll share something my boyfriend told me. *Referring to me calling a birthmark a fault* "They aren't faults, they are what makes you unique and beautiful to me."

[GothicLolita]

Thank you for the information 8) .

i'll definatly look into it now just wish we had a car to just drive to hobo hehe

[ScreenagerX]

Hi,

I'm just curious to speak to anyone here who is either a porn addict or ex porn addict or someone who has dealt with one before.

 

I am a recovering porn addict still going through counselling & trying to deal with a marriage dissolution. Perhaps I can offer some insight from the addicts side.

 

(for those that remember me, yes I am comfortable admitting I am an addict now)

[emny]

I am also dealing with the same issue. I caught my boyfriend through myspace trying to hook up with girls when he was going out of town. He swears that it is purley for the thrill and that he had no intention of meeting up with them. I do believe him as the email exchanges were short, but it has really affected us and my trust. My confidence is also low now. I thought we had the greatest relationship and we've been together 3 years! He is now persuing porn addiction therapy which is very expensive. He won't allow me to talk to myt friends about it because he is sooo embarrassed, but I feel alone now. He was the one person that I could always trust. I am so frustrated. I am 27 years old he is 39. I am a professional broadway dancer with a great body. We are totally open with each other. Watch porn together try everything in bed. What else is he looking for and why? He has deleted his accounts and doesn't look at porn anymore, but how do I know it won't creep back in? I am in the NY area as well.

[candy604]

whiterrabbit, sorry to hear what is happening. please don't have sex with ur husband b/c of health reasons! ( and he's also a cheater).

 

can you take him to see a psychotherapist or someone?