Weird stage of my relationship that I’m scared of

[Mason Parsons]

Try finding a balance where you both can work on yourselves while still being there for each other. Counseling could be a good idea too, to help navigate this tricky stage.

[Jibralta]

On 3/12/2024 at 3:57 AM, MissCanuck said:

Girl, you need to start looking for alternate accommdations. 

I agree. I know it sucks, but this is your way out. 

On 3/11/2024 at 7:09 AM, Advice4888 said:

He said he’ll message me and see me after he has some time to himself. What does this mean everyone I’ve never been in a situation like this and I’m really confused.

This means the relationship is not important to him. Bottom line. 

On 3/11/2024 at 7:09 AM, Advice4888 said:

When we woke up he said that the night made him feel so much better and that he’s glad we finally had a conversation were we didn’t argue.... He said that for now we won’t be together but he will visit me and we are gonna work on it until perhaps hes less confused.

Translation: He feels better because he got some sex. Now that he knows he can still have sex with you outside of the relationship, he'll stop by when he wants more. 

You have to protect your heart because he's not going to. He is all about him. I am sorry that you feel hurt, but he is not a good partner. You will just feel even more hurt if you let this go on. 

[rainbowsandroses]

I'd love to hear the boyfriend's side to this story.  

I think it's quite telling that OP stopped desiring to have sex with him when he was there, IN the relationship, but NOW that he's moving out and distancing himself, she suddenly craves him sexually? Because she wants to feel "connected"?

Shouldn't it be the other way around?

OP, I'm not quite buying that you stopped wanting sex with him because you were "hurt."

And what, you're NOT hurt now?  He's moving out!  Doesn't that hurt you?  But yet you sexually desire him and crave him..

Something is missing. We (I) need more context and I think there's more to this situation than what what you've thus far shared. 

JMO

 

[Wiseman2]

On 3/11/2024 at 6:59 PM, Advice4888 said:

I offered it because I wanted to feel connected to him as well. Maybe a part of me did hope that he would realise something by it as well. What do you think? I feel like perhaps he would have left by now but he’s sticking around I’m not sure 

It seems like you are hoping reintroducing sex will make him come home and stop camping at his sister's. It's possible it may work, since shutting him out and arguing was the reason he wanted space and relief from that. 

This has nothing to do with "craving" him or silly pickup artist push-pull theories. This seems like you want him to come home. 

[rainbowsandroses]

Wiseman, craving sex or anything else has nothing to do with "pickup" or "push-pull" theories. 

"Craving" was MY wording for what you posted below which I agree with.  It's also true, it does appear like she is desperate for sexually intimacy with him, now that he's moved out.

Desperate = craving.  Which is what I meant, to clarify. 

36 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said:

It seems like you are hoping reintroducing sex will make him come home and stop camping at his sister's. It's possible it may work, since shutting him out and arguing was the reason he wanted space and relief from that. 

We are in agreement about this^.