Is Giving Up Too Easy On One Woman A Bad Thing? Should I Try Harder?

[KlearKut]

Recently I've been developing this abundannce "Plenty Of Fish" mindset, where If one girl I'm texting shows any sign of what I think is disinterest or if I think I'm investing way more than she is, I'll promptly give up on her and move on to the next... "If this one doesn't want me, another one will... Just gotta keep moving forward..."...

Signs like dry, one-line replies, taking several hours to respond, leaving me on read... or the dreaded one-word answers...

Should I try harder?

[bluecastle]

12 minutes ago, KlearKut said:

Should I try harder?

No, the opposite. 

If there is a theme to your threads here it is manic thirst. Woman shows a flicker of interest and you’re flying a spaceship to Mars; this interest wanes and you’re in a tailspin, searching for the best rocket ship. Ever try to enjoy the scenery on a drive where someone only floors the gas and then slams on the brakes? It’s not possible.

Texting is meaningless, a lame way to gauge interest, especially with people you barely know. It’s like emotional pornography: fast, easy, and potentially dangerous if you start subbing it in for the real thing. Are you not able to set up a date, do your thing until that date, see how the date goes, and then take it from there? 

 

[LootieTootie]

3 hours ago, KlearKut said:

 

Should I try harder?

No. 

Always go with your gut. If your gut is telling you this woman isn't that in to me, be willing to say "next!"

[Wiseman2]

5 hours ago, KlearKut said:

Signs like dry, one-line replies, taking several hours to respond, leaving me on read... or the dreaded one-word answers..

You should try asking them out. Texting is not dating. Texting data is not a sign of interest.

[Wiseman2]

Quote

A 2015 survey from wireless carrier  shows that 9 out of 10 people bring their smartphone with them to the bathroom.

Just think, how many times have you brought your phone into the bathroom? Daily? Multiple times per day?

While it may be fun to kill time scrolling Instagram or checking email while pooping, using your smartphone on the toilet has some real dirty consequences for your health.

All that sitting and scrolling is actually pretty bad for your butt, too, it turns out.

Prolonged sitting, which can happen if you get very absorbed in your smartphone, can up your risk of hemorrhoids. There’s no concrete research yet (although a clinical trial is in the works), but still, experts are concerned.

This is why paying too much attention to how much, how fast, how often someone texts does not indicate interest.

[boltnrun]

Phone in the bathroom? That's so unsanitary! I don't want poop or pee on my phone!

Your date is tonight, right? Forget trying to start an insta-relationship or overemphasizing texting. Learning to relax and enjoy the dating experience is key. Otherwise, if you're anxious and miserable why bother?

[Batya33]

I had my list of dealbreakers and moved on right away if any were broken -especially when communicating through a dating site.  I exchanged one or two emails, had one phone call of about 20 minutes and then we decided to meet if we were interested in meeting and typically met within the week.  I moved on if the man was not interested in meeting in person in the near future, if he'd lied about his age/marital status/educational background, if he said anything sexual, if I didn't find him well spoken or having appropriate manners and in general if I didn't think I'd enjoy meeting him in person for an hour or so.  

I met over 100 men in person but received and sent hundreds of messages, etc -I deliberately lived in the middle of a city teeming with singles in my age range so that I had a better chance of finding someone to marry.  

I agree with moving on but have a sense of what your personal dealbreakers are.  

[catfeeder]

On 4/17/2022 at 8:51 PM, KlearKut said:

Should I try harder?

The only accurate thing to be learned from messaging is how much a person likes to message and how good they are at it. 

Not exactly reliable info that has anything to do with you. 

Instead of measuring people this way, why not ask them to meet for a quick coffee to check one another out?

If they don't respond well to that, then they've screened themselves out. You won't need to decide a thing about them until after you meet them.