I think I’m starting to crush on my friends ex which is a bad thing, how do I turn it into a good thing?

[Targeted student]

Ok so I’ll just start from when they were still dating. My friend had dated a guy for some time and she had her life I had mine so we never really crossed paths. So when the new school year started it was strange. It was normal at first until her boyfriend joined the class, since we knew each-other briefly online I just started talking to him. He and my friend are one of the notorious couples. So I knew to keep my boundaries. But the more we started to talk the closer we looked apparently. One day he told me that someone in the class we were in had told my friend that he was cheating on her with me😳(he told me this). But I only had one class with him so it’s someone who is in that same class. I didn’t really find out what was really happening until I got closer to my friend. But that’s later. So he one day I wanted his help on the work ‘cause I was tired and wanted to fall asleep. He was gonna help me but he stood up to go to my seat, like bro first of all I could just face my work to you. Second, I see no reason you have to squat and hold on to my chair. At one point I get a question right but this is where I put a stop to it. My jeans were ripped right at the top of my thigh. And this mf tapped it like pat-pat on it. I told him to go to his seat after that but I told my friends in case it was worse than I thought. Although I regretted it because they confronted him about it. And we sat next to each other and we didn’t talk until I was moved somewhere else. Eventually he got moved next to me. It was awkward at first but then we started talking again. And at that point he broke up with my friend. They broke up because she found so many red flags. And I knew how bad he was so I knew I’m never going to date him. He literally follows like 127 strippers on TikTok. But then he started making little moves that made my heart flutter just a tiny bit. One day I got to skip a period and go to an ice cream party in that class. But he was there too. But none of my friends were 😭. So I just went on my phone . But he kept coming up to me asking if I wanted someone to talk to. I said I was fine cause I liked tiktok bro. Then he didn’t stop so after his last attempt I grabbed a game but then he came along. He guided my hand how to play. Like no need to hold my hand when there is instructions. So a couple days after we were talking but it wasn’t like usual we stared into each others eyes. He stared into mine. 😳 and I’m like thinking is this the guy who I’m supposed to hate? And today it was the worst I was just playing with my hair, putting my fingers through it. But I didn’t think he’d care because he was talking with the boyz since he invited them to our area bc why not. But yeah I played with my hair but he told me “Your hair is messed up” I’m like “*** what did you say 😐” cause I thought he was insulting me. He said “lean forward” I’m like “huh!???” Like dude *** do you want me to do THAT?! He just said it again lean forward but his hands were out like if he was praising someone lol. But he fixed my hair for me and said it was soft and pretty. So now I’m trying to figure out how to date him without my friends hating me.

[Wiseman2]

7 hours ago, Targeted student said:

. He and my friend are one of the notorious couples.

Why not date other boys? He sounds like trouble. How old is he?

Try to be more secure about your popularity and attractiveness. You don't have to chase boys this hard or run after your friends' exes.

What is "a notorious couple"? How long were he and your friend dating?

[Rose Mosse]

7 hours ago, Targeted student said:

Ok so I’ll just start from when they were still dating. My friend had dated a guy for some time and she had her life I had mine so we never really crossed paths. So when the new school year started it was strange. It was normal at first until her boyfriend joined the class, since we knew each-other briefly online I just started talking to him. He and my friend are one of the notorious couples. So I knew to keep my boundaries. But the more we started to talk the closer we looked apparently. One day he told me that someone in the class we were in had told my friend that he was cheating on her with me😳(he told me this). But I only had one class with him so it’s someone who is in that same class. I didn’t really find out what was really happening until I got closer to my friend. But that’s later. So he one day I wanted his help on the work ‘cause I was tired and wanted to fall asleep. He was gonna help me but he stood up to go to my seat, like bro first of all I could just face my work to you. Second, I see no reason you have to squat and hold on to my chair. At one point I get a question right but this is where I put a stop to it. My jeans were ripped right at the top of my thigh. And this mf tapped it like pat-pat on it. I told him to go to his seat after that but I told my friends in case it was worse than I thought. Although I regretted it because they confronted him about it. And we sat next to each other and we didn’t talk until I was moved somewhere else. Eventually he got moved next to me. It was awkward at first but then we started talking again. And at that point he broke up with my friend. They broke up because she found so many red flags. And I knew how bad he was so I knew I’m never going to date him. He literally follows like 127 strippers on TikTok. But then he started making little moves that made my heart flutter just a tiny bit. One day I got to skip a period and go to an ice cream party in that class. But he was there too. But none of my friends were 😭. So I just went on my phone . But he kept coming up to me asking if I wanted someone to talk to. I said I was fine cause I liked tiktok bro. Then he didn’t stop so after his last attempt I grabbed a game but then he came along. He guided my hand how to play. Like no need to hold my hand when there is instructions. So a couple days after we were talking but it wasn’t like usual we stared into each others eyes. He stared into mine. 😳 and I’m like thinking is this the guy who I’m supposed to hate? And today it was the worst I was just playing with my hair, putting my fingers through it. But I didn’t think he’d care because he was talking with the boyz since he invited them to our area bc why not. But yeah I played with my hair but he told me “Your hair is messed up” I’m like “*** what did you say 😐” cause I thought he was insulting me. He said “lean forward” I’m like “huh!???” Like dude *** do you want me to do THAT?! He just said it again lean forward but his hands were out like if he was praising someone lol. But he fixed my hair for me and said it was soft and pretty. So now I’m trying to figure out how to date him without my friends hating me.

Aw hell no. He did not go for the hair. 

Leave him alone. You mentioned seeing red flags as did your friend so move along.

[Jibralta]

I'd steer way clear of him. He's drama city.

[Targeted student]

Thanks guys! I’ve honestly tried figuring out ways we could date but gladly I couldn’t find a way. We only have 1 class together and he only communicates through Instagram. Also I don’t have Instagram due to drama previously in the year. But although he made my heart flutter, I’ll have to ignore it knowing it might not end well.

[Targeted student]

On 1/21/2022 at 1:12 AM, Wiseman2 said:

Why not date other boys? He sounds like trouble. How old is he?

Try to be more secure about your popularity and attractiveness. You don't have to chase boys this hard or run after your friends' exes.

What is "a notorious couple"? How long were he and your friend dating?

I really would like to 😄! But most boys see me as weird because I don’t wear two inch lashes and apply lipgloss every two seconds. And by “notorious couple” I mean everyone knew they were dating.

[Targeted student]

On 1/21/2022 at 1:47 AM, Rose Mosse said:

Aw hell no. He did not go for the hair. 

Leave him alone. You mentioned seeing red flags as did your friend so move along.

Actually, he has more red flags than I could count but I'll try listing them out but first I’ll tell you one of them in detail. Ok so when my friend was still dating him, she was dancing or something idk. And she had brushed his stomach also he’s like 5’6? She’s like 5’2? Anyways she apologized, but he said to “make it up to him” if he could touch her stomach. 🚩

[Wiseman2]

4 hours ago, Targeted student said:

 most boys see me as weird because I don’t wear two inch lashes and apply lipgloss every two seconds. 

That's nonsense. You need to be friendly approachable smile and get involved in your classes, school events, clubs, groups and sports.

Don't be jealous and insecure. Get off ridiculous social media that is poisoning your mind into thinking you need to be overly dolled up to date boys.

Work on your personality, that's the problem.

 

[Rose Mosse]

8 hours ago, Targeted student said:

Actually, he has more red flags than I could count but I'll try listing them out but first I’ll tell you one of them in detail. Ok so when my friend was still dating him, she was dancing or something idk. And she had brushed his stomach also he’s like 5’6? She’s like 5’2? Anyways she apologized, but he said to “make it up to him” if he could touch her stomach. 🚩

That is not a red flag. They were dating. Why would she apologize for that in the first place? 

The problem with this guy is he flirts with you while dating her and overtly too.

Date someone else who has his head screwed on straight and doesn’t womanize every walking female body in school. 

And you are not weird for not wearing fake eyelashes and lipgloss. I’ve never stuck on a single pasty on my eyes and my hair gets stuck in lipgloss (gross). Be confident in your own natural beauty.

[smackie9]

Go ahead and date him…..you take your chances that he’s gonna monkey branch on you and break your heart. That’s how he rolls hun.