He says he will never speak to me again

[Dazz]

Dazz,

 

The guy who dumped you reacted in an impulsive and extreme manner. I've encountered personalities similar to your ex-boyfriend which is alarming and those types of people are red flags to me. I don't like people who are so abrupt to the point of cruel. Since your ex-boyfriend had no qualms breaking up with you via text, you're better off without him. Some people's personalities are unreasonable the way they're so Draconian and drastic with their reactions. They're the types who never foresee its harsh consequences.

 

I prefer people who are mature, who talk it out, who wish to resolve issues in a calm manner and peaceful types. Hot heads are omitted from my life FOREVER.

 

Whenever I've had people block me or react with extremely harsh cruelty towards me, the next time they were nice to me, it was my turn to give them the cold shoulder and I made sure that I exited their life forever. Granted, should our paths cross, I'm polite, respectful yet blunt and frostily distant. Note strong enforced boundaries. I don't give second chances once I find out what people are capable of because I know they'll be mean to me again. It's only a matter of time. I don't trust them anymore. Once bitten, twice shy. Live and learn the hard way.

 

As for you, always observe a person's personality and character. If they're the type who easily ghosts or blocks you, cuts you off, breaks up suddenly whether in a relationship or friendship, excludes you from their social events or life, dismisses you easily or discards you if they're moody, you should bail immediately and when I say "bail," I mean you should exit their life permanently. These types of volatile temperaments are unpredictable yet predictable. They're complicated, gaslighting personalities so run for the hills. I've since learned this harsh lesson the hard way. Ever since I've learned how to pick and choose who deserves to be in my life due to following the respect rules, I've never been more content and secure. You ought to try to change the way you think. It's the best thing I had ever done.

 

That was extreme, wasn't it! Just cut like I angered him and his armies. It felt cruel indeed to just get cut like that with no option to resolve/fix and move forward. But I gave him his perfect ammunition to blame his intended exit all on me.

 

I'm so happy you've found a new you. Much respect. Bless all the women who never had to endure such personalities because if they are not strong, this can take one to the abyss. I have been on the fence as I am accountable but also torn, but this forum has been really helpful. Thanks for your kind words.

[Dazz]

Yes. I have been meditating and praying for me to get back to normal. I hate this feeling.

I'm only on day 4. I just can't wait to leave 2020 behind. I do not plan to call. His ego will not let him call. I hope to have evolved to higher grounds when and if he calls/texts. My integrity would be lifted tremendously I feel.

 

Honey, they all come back.

 

But you have to take care of yourself first. It doesn't sound like he was treating you well at all. This person is showing you how little he cares. What you do is you keep walking and you start taking better care of yourself. Be around people who love and care about you.

 

You do not have to call or text him anymore. Leave him alone. Be careful if he texts or calls you again or if you run into each other again. You should remember that when someone shows you what they think of you through their actions and words, you look long and hard and you listen exactly to what they're saying. Leave this for a few days, minimum one week, and wait for the withdrawal or panicky feeling to subside. You'll have a clearer head then and then take a good hard look at what's been happening between the both of you.

[Wiseman2]

Yes indeed...it's been a nightmare for so many and it has wreaked havoc with so many lives and relationships. Absolutely look forward, not back.

I just can't wait to leave 2020 behind.

[Cherylyn]

That was extreme, wasn't it! Just cut like I angered him and his armies. It felt cruel indeed to just get cut like that with no option to resolve/fix and move forward. But I gave him his perfect ammunition to blame his intended exit all on me.

 

I'm so happy you've found a new you. Much respect. Bless all the women who never had to endure such personalities because if they are not strong, this can take one to the abyss. I have been on the fence as I am accountable but also torn, but this forum has been really helpful. Thanks for your kind words.

 

Yes, it happens. It's a great big world out there and all sorts of unsavory personalities and characters. It's your turn to have the freedom of choice and only choose the best people in your life because going this route will make you happy and secure.

 

Whether there's ammunition or not, it's a red flag when someone is so impulsive and abrupt without nary a concern about the consequences. I prefer people who wish to resolve issues in a mature, calm way as opposed to cutting a person off just like that. You're actually better off without your ex-boyfriend because he's very selfish, self-centered and doesn't think about anyone except himself. The world is full of people like that. However, you are in the driver's seat and you can decide who is worthy in your life and who isn't worth your time of day.

 

Much respect to you, too. Thank you. Bless you and what he did to you was a blessing in disguise. Now you know the real him, his true colors and you've lost respect for him. You will get through this. It was not all in vain. Consider it wisdom gained for you for life.

[Dazz]

Yes, it happens. It's a great big world out there and all sorts of unsavory personalities and characters. It's your turn to have the freedom of choice and only choose the best people in your life because going this route will make you happy and secure.

 

Whether there's ammunition or not, it's a red flag when someone is so impulsive and abrupt without nary a concern about the consequences. I prefer people who wish to resolve issues in a mature, calm way as opposed to cutting a person off just like that. You're actually better off without your ex-boyfriend because he's very selfish, self-centered and doesn't think about anyone except himself. The world is full of people like that. However, you are in the driver's seat and you can decide who is worthy in your life and who isn't worth your time of day.

 

Much respect to you, too. Thank you. Bless you and what he did to you was a blessing in disguise. Now you know the real him, his true colors and you've lost respect for him. You will get through this. It was not all in vain. Consider it wisdom gained for you for life.

 

Amen! Working on shutting down the little voice in my head that's saying he'll be back. I did notice the crumb I was getting and should have been gone but I guess I was trying for a baby it was better to stay then to start all over meeting new people. In the end, meeting new people it would be so I should have led with that.

I like the driver's seat. Destination to anywhere with no shackles or chains. He did free me. No more walking on eggshells and praying every beep that comes thru is him. I need to start celebrating this. I gave so much to him, I'm sure he'll miss that. I need to start a new channel on red flags!

[Dazz]

Yes indeed...it's been a nightmare for so many and it has wreaked havoc with so many lives and relationships. Absolutely look forward, not back.

 

I'm feeling better already!! Yes, forward. It's ok that I was played, my integrity left in shambles. I will make it up. I will do better. I will focus on me. He never wanted me anyways and the disrespect to not get a mere goodbye. I could understand if I had cheated, rob or beat him but wow over this??! It only tells me that if this happened 2 years down the road, he would still cut and leave because if it's not forgivable now, I doubt it would be down the road and I would have had way more invested by then.

[MissCanuck]

I did notice the crumb I was getting and should have been gone but I guess I was trying for a baby it was better to stay

 

With this guy, that would have been a huge mistake.

 

Your relationship was nowhere near strong or healthy enough to bring a child into. It's a good thing it didn't happen with him. You almost surely would have wound up raising that baby on your own, and it doesn't seem that's the sort of family you envision for yourself.

[Dazz]

With this guy, that would have been a huge mistake.

 

Your relationship was nowhere near strong or healthy enough to bring a child into. It's a good thing it didn't happen with him. You almost surely would have wound up raising that baby on your own, and it doesn't seem that's the sort of family you envision for yourself.

 

I was ok with the single mom idea. I would have a kid to focus on and not a guy. We don't live together or in the same state. I figured I would be spared.

[Cherylyn]

Amen! Working on shutting down the little voice in my head that's saying he'll be back. I did notice the crumb I was getting and should have been gone but I guess I was trying for a baby it was better to stay then to start all over meeting new people. In the end, meeting new people it would be so I should have led with that.

I like the driver's seat. Destination to anywhere with no shackles or chains. He did free me. No more walking on eggshells and praying every beep that comes thru is him. I need to start celebrating this. I gave so much to him, I'm sure he'll miss that. I need to start a new channel on red flags!

 

Always be kind to yourself by treating yourself to self-respect. Never settle for anybody no matter who they are. Always focus on the quality of character because at the end of the day, a character worth admiring is most enduring.

 

Don't have regrets nor wish for people who are not good because they don't deserve to be in your life. Only be with a secure person who has integrity, empathy and morals. Everyone else doesn't qualify. Become very picky and choosy because it will pay off later. Bad people are nothing but headaches for you so stay away from them. (Avoid selfish types, unempathetic types, gaslighters, those who lack 'emotional intelligence' and manipulators / sociopaths. Google those words and learn about the evils of human psychology.)

[Dazz]

Always be kind to yourself by treating yourself to self-respect. Never settle for anybody no matter who they are. Always focus on the quality of character because at the end of the day, a character worth admiring is most enduring.

 

Don't have regrets nor wish for people who are not good because they don't deserve to be in your life. Only be with a secure person who has integrity, empathy and morals. Everyone else doesn't qualify. Become very picky and choosy because it will pay off later. Bad people are nothing but headaches for you so stay away from them. (Avoid selfish types, unempathetic types, gaslighters, those who lack 'emotional intelligence' and manipulators / sociopaths. Google those words and learn about the evils of human psychology.)

 

I need to print this and post on my mirror 😍