So there's this old friend who sent me a message.

[megumitheia]

Why not view silly immature high school cliques and dynamics for what they are? Immature people doing immature things. The longer you hold on to grudges and anger the more you reduce the quality of your own well being. Let go of these past resentments and move forward.

 

If you don't want to be on reunion lists or attend reunions, don't. It's that simple. Why get angry and upset about it? You are not obligated to be friends with or communicate with anyone. If people from your past bother you simply delete and block them and get off any email lists, social media, etc that involves reunions or high school classmates.

 

I think you're right. I will have to reflect on this.

[megumitheia]

What exactly are you so afraid of? This sounds like you are hiding from something? What is it? And why?

 

The awkwardness of all the how are yous and how it has been kind of thing. I'm afraid that they would invite me to hang out which is so hard to decline (i'm bad at turning down people). I'm afraid to hear all about of what's currently happening to them, these old friends are all connected to my ex who has been the root of all my painful experiences in the past. We were all classmates. As I've posted in my replies, I'm avoiding small talks with these old friends as I know a lot of past issues could be brought up again (with all the how are yous and what not) and I'm not in the best mood to go back with all of that. Like this guy has been seeing this girl. This girl who has been my old friend all along and that guy was my ex - kind of thing.

 

 

Would you be on your own in this other city? Or do your family and boyfriend live there? If they don't already live there, how often will you get to see them?

 

If ever, I will talk to them and be with me. Or it won't be much too far from them. This is still for discussion so I'm still not sure. But if you're going to ask me, I wish we can live in another city away from my hometown / school.

[Wiseman2]

Simply stop letting your ex control your life, your happiness and your future. Live your own new life and stop living your life around avoiding an old exbf.

 

Why not focus on your current bf, rather than staying hung up on some irrelevant old high school bf? If you can't get over it, consider some short term therapy to sort all this out so you can move forward and stop letting the past haunt you.

these old friends are all connected to my ex who has been the root of all my painful experiences in the past.