His mental health is affecting mine

[catfeeder]

Im not sure i want to be with him anymore anyway as we are not getting on and hes adding to my stress.

 

You're working awfully hard to exhaust yourself with negative spinning. Why not put all that energy to your advantage by identifying the good stuff?

 

You don't really want to be with the guy, and he's not positioned to move with you. Good, so move on and let him work out his own business. If it was ever a meant-to-be deal, he'll have no trouble catching up to you.

 

You're only 45 miles from loved ones, and that's a good testing point for learning how many more friends you can make and add to your mix. Meanwhile, there are phones and transportation to keep you in your old loop.

 

You're not committing to forever, you're committing to try this new area for the duration of your lease. Consider it an adventure in shedding unwanted 'stuff' and starting a whole new adventure.

 

Head high, you can do this.

[kathy679]

You're working awfully hard to exhaust yourself with negative spinning. Why not put all that energy to your advantage by identifying the good stuff?

 

You don't really want to be with the guy, and he's not positioned to move with you. Good, so move on and let him work out his own business. If it was ever a meant-to-be deal, he'll have no trouble catching up to you.

 

You're only 45 miles from loved ones, and that's a good testing point for learning how many more friends you can make and add to your mix. Meanwhile, there are phones and transportation to keep you in your old loop.

 

You're not committing to forever, you're committing to try this new area for the duration of your lease. Consider it an adventure in shedding unwanted 'stuff' and starting a whole new adventure.

 

Head high, you can do this.

 

Its not a lease ive taken out a morgage so i have commited.

 

Yes i do look at things negativley alot of the time but i think thats down to my depression. I do try not to but sometimes my thinking does get warped and i worry. I know its irrational alot of the time but im working on that.

 

I have written out all of my options for this move and a pros and cons list so hopefully i will come to a good conclusion

[catfeeder]

Its not a lease ive taken out a morgage so i have commited.

 

Yes i do look at things negativley alot of the time but i think thats down to my depression. I do try not to but sometimes my thinking does get warped and i worry. I know its irrational alot of the time but im working on that.

 

I have written out all of my options for this move and a pros and cons list so hopefully i will come to a good conclusion

 

Okay! Since you've committed, you can decide to invest in giving this your best mental and emotional shot by building all of your pro's UP, and trust that you'll cross any necessary bridges as you need to. The alternative is to drill a negative hole to climb out of for no good payoff.

 

Consider this a challenge and set a target date in the future to decide whether you'll want to stay or sell. In the meantime, commit to giving every aspect of this your best possible spin--and then aspire TOWARD that spin.

 

You get to pick your own lens and whether you want to make this experience easier or more difficult.

 

Choose wisely, and congrAts on your new home!

[kathy679]

Thanks catfeeder ive written my positives list, im looking at the good that can happen not the negatives and first thing im going to fo when i move in is put my stamp on it.