Larajuan Posted January 29, 2018 Share Posted January 29, 2018 A couple of days ago my girlfriend grabbed my phone out of the sudden and I took it back. She said I was hiding something I told her I wasn’t I just didn’t like that. I gave her my phone and she went through all of it and She found out that one of my friends had commented on a Snapchat story I had posted and she took it in the wrong way. She was complementing my brother and we even had a conversation about him but she said how this all played out. She later checked our text messages between me and my friend and she got upset because I would ask her for advice on our relationship. My girlfriend said I did her dirty and she does not care about me anymore. I want to make it right. In my head I never did her dirty so how can I make her see that? Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted January 29, 2018 Share Posted January 29, 2018 Unfortunately her grabbing your phone is wrong. Why are you confiding in this friend about your relationship? It sounds like the phone grab is the tip of the iceberg of problems. What else is going on here? A couple of days ago my girlfriend grabbed my phone out of the sudden and I took it back. She later checked our text messages between me and my friend and she got upset because I would ask her for advice on our relationship. Link to comment
Larajuan Posted January 29, 2018 Author Share Posted January 29, 2018 Unfortunately her grabbing your phone is wrong. Why are you confiding in this friend about your relationship? It sounds like the phone grab is the tip of the iceberg of problems. What else is going on here? She’s gone through similar experiences as me. So I feel like she can give the best advice. My girlfriend and I have gone through a lot. We’ve have our break ups and it’s mostly for dumb reasons. One time it was because one of her coworkers talked bad about her and I didn’t “defend” her take in mind I do not work with her and I was nowhere near her to “defend” her. When this last problem happened I told her if I was hiding something or doing something wrong I would not have given you my phone at all but I did. Link to comment
Larajuan Posted January 29, 2018 Author Share Posted January 29, 2018 Just last week she got mad at me for not replying to her “lol” message and she ignored me for three days Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted January 29, 2018 Share Posted January 29, 2018 How long have you been dating? the frequent breakups and other manipulations like silent treatments etc. may make you want to rethink this.Just last week she got mad at me for not replying to her “lol” message and she ignored me for three days Link to comment
Larajuan Posted January 29, 2018 Author Share Posted January 29, 2018 There’s more to it. She’s says I did her dirty for not telling her about my friend and opening up my feelings to my friend. I then tried to bring up the fact that she has guy friends that like her and want to be with her and she will still text them knowing that but she bring ups the fact that it’s different because they talk about games and cars. Link to comment
Larajuan Posted January 29, 2018 Author Share Posted January 29, 2018 We’ve been going out for 8 months now. Every time we break up she brings up her ex and how he wouldn’t do this or he wouldn’t do that. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted January 29, 2018 Share Posted January 29, 2018 Sorry it just keep getting worse. Were you the rebound guy?Every time we break up she brings up her ex and how he wouldn’t do this or he wouldn’t do that. Link to comment
Larajuan Posted January 29, 2018 Author Share Posted January 29, 2018 Sorry it just keep getting worse. Were you the rebound guy? She tried dating before me but it didn’t work out. I’ve told her multiple times if you haven’t moved on from your ex it’s just best to leave it here. She always says she has. It’s been almost 2 years since they broke up. We have a nice relationship it’s just little things get to her and she makes a huge deal out of them. She always makes me feel like the victim but in most cases I feel that our problems can be solved by us just talking and she never wants to do that Link to comment
DancingFool Posted January 29, 2018 Share Posted January 29, 2018 ....We have a nice relationship.....when she is not going psycho, grabbing my phone, accusing me of insane things, giving me the silent treatment over absolutely nothing, otherwise acting out like a manipulative psycho, etc. If this psychotic chaos is your definition of a nice relationship, I'd be totally terrified to see what you would define as a bad relationship. Dude, it's only been 8 months. Dump this psycho chic before you totally lose your own sanity. Never ever put up with the kind of crazy behavior that you are describing. I don't even care how low your self esteem is and how hot this psycho is or how great in bed, get your balls back from her and get rid of her. Today. Link to comment
Larajuan Posted January 29, 2018 Author Share Posted January 29, 2018 ....We have a nice relationship.....when she is not going psycho, grabbing my phone, accusing me of insane things, giving me the silent treatment over absolutely nothing, otherwise acting out like a manipulative psycho, etc. If this psychotic chaos is your definition of a nice relationship, I'd be totally terrified to see what you would define as a bad relationship. Dude, it's only been 8 months. Dump this psycho chic before you totally lose your own sanity. Never ever put up with the kind of crazy behavior that you are describing. I don't even care how low your self esteem is and how hot this psycho is or how great in bed, get your balls back from her and get rid of her. Today. There was a time where I was helping her pay bills and she dumped me because I was adding too much stress in her life. Three days later she was talking to another guy and they guy and her talked bad about me. Later that month she apologized to me and of course i took her back. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted January 29, 2018 Share Posted January 29, 2018 It's up to you to decide not to be a glutton for punishment. Plenty of nice girls out there once you extricate yourself from this.There was a time where I was helping her pay bills and she dumped me because I was adding too much stress in her life. Link to comment
Larajuan Posted January 29, 2018 Author Share Posted January 29, 2018 It's up to you to decide not to be a glutton for punishment. Plenty of nice girls out there once you extricate yourself from this. She just makes me feel really bad. Like it’s all my fault. Every time I get blamed for everything instead of us both talking. Link to comment
MissCanuck Posted January 29, 2018 Share Posted January 29, 2018 Why are you still dating this girl? This isn't a "nice" relationship - it's far from it. It's dramatic, volatile and unstable. You shouldn't even need to utter the phrase "every time we break up" because they shouldn't even be multiple break-ups, OP. Is that what you think love really looks like? Link to comment
DancingFool Posted January 29, 2018 Share Posted January 29, 2018 She just makes me feel really bad. Like it’s all my fault. Every time I get blamed for everything instead of us both talking. You can't expect a crazy person to be and act like a sane person. You are never going to sit down and talk about anything. She will always blame you, manipulate you, and guilt trip you for as long as you stick around. It's on you to recognize that she is psycho, that her behavior is completely outside the bounds of sanity and to walk away, block her and get rid of her permanently. Once you do that, you do need sit down with yourself and examine carefully what possessed you to put up with that kind insanity and abuse. Yes, she is mentally and emotionally abusing you. Link to comment
boltnrun Posted January 29, 2018 Share Posted January 29, 2018 Name some good things about the relationship that cancel out all the BS you are required to put up with in order to stay with her. I'm guessing porn-star level sex and "she's hot" as two of the things you'll name. Link to comment
Morello Posted January 29, 2018 Share Posted January 29, 2018 It doesn't matter if she says she is over her ex, she is not. A person who is truly over an ex just doesn't mention them that much, if at all. I just mean she hasn't fully healed from the ex and is projecting her needs from previous relationships onto this new one. If she's truly doing that, you'll never win, trust me. If you do like her exes did, she'll feel she's making the same mistake by dating someone who acts like the ones who didn't work out for her. If you do differently, she'll accuse you of not doing like her exes did (like you mentioned). The fact she's even comparing you to him just makes it crystal clear in my opinion. It appears she lost feelings (if she ever had them anyway, being it a rebound) and just used a silly excuse to leave the relationship. Alto, the fact you broke up many things Link to comment
Larajuan Posted January 30, 2018 Author Share Posted January 30, 2018 A couple of days ago my girlfriend grabbed my phone out of the sudden and I took it back. She said I was hiding something I told her I wasn’t I just didn’t like that. I gave her my phone and she went through all of it and She found out that one of my friends had commented on a Snapchat story I had posted and she took it in the wrong way. She was complementing my brother and we even had a conversation about him but she said how this all played out. She later checked our text messages between me and my friend and she got upset because I would ask her for advice on our relationship. My girlfriend said I did her dirty and she does not care about me anymore. I want to make it right. In my head I never did her dirty so how can I make her see that? Update: today she apologized for everything and said we could be friends. Link to comment
MissCanuck Posted January 31, 2018 Share Posted January 31, 2018 And I hope you refused that ridiculous offer? Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted January 31, 2018 Share Posted January 31, 2018 Did she go back to this ex she's always talking about?said we could be friends. Link to comment
Larajuan Posted February 1, 2018 Author Share Posted February 1, 2018 And I hope you refused that ridiculous offer? Yes I did, she apologized for hurting me but she still blamed me for everything and said we were good as friends. I told her I did not want her friendship because I know that would open back the doors to get back together and I just can’t. Link to comment
Larajuan Posted February 1, 2018 Author Share Posted February 1, 2018 Did she go back to this ex she's always talking about? No she just told me she was sorry for everything she did to me although she till blamed me for doing her dirty. She said we were good as friends but I know this would open doors for us to get back together and I don’t want that. Link to comment
boltnrun Posted February 1, 2018 Share Posted February 1, 2018 Do your other friends blame you for everything too? Link to comment
Larajuan Posted February 2, 2018 Author Share Posted February 2, 2018 A couple of days ago my girlfriend grabbed my phone out of the sudden and I took it back. She said I was hiding something I told her I wasn’t I just didn’t like that. I gave her my phone and she went through all of it and She found out that one of my friends had commented on a Snapchat story I had posted and she took it in the wrong way. She was complementing my brother and we even had a conversation about him but she said how this all played out. She later checked our text messages between me and my friend and she got upset because I would ask her for advice on our relationship. My girlfriend said I did her dirty and she does not care about me anymore. I want to make it right. In my head I never did her dirty so how can I make her see that? Another update: she’s already talking to someone else. She told me this after telling her I do not want to be friends. She said I was a mistake from the beginning and that I was a liar. I did not reply but it did hurt deep inside Link to comment
MissCanuck Posted February 2, 2018 Share Posted February 2, 2018 OP, you need to cut this woman-child off. She is bringing you nothing but grief. Stop allowing her to contact you. Unless and until you commit to going to No Contact, you're your own worst enemy. Link to comment
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