She broke up because she doesn't trust me , but loves me

[Levi821]

Hey,

 

So here's our relationship summed up a bit.

We have been together for a year and almost 3 months now. We broke up a few times there , but always ended up getting back together.

 

What bothers her I was in okay relations with my ex , as in friends. Now I told her once my ex tried to kiss me , but did not manage.

 

Then she started getting jealous about it. It got worse and worse. Then I was chatting with my ex at some point.

 

After I've told her I don't want to do anything with her , we're only friends. She said "I miss you" only that , to which I replied "I miss you too girl with the most beautiful eyes on the world".

 

Now you're probably confused why I said that to my ex , but I said it because she used to call me before "boy with the most beautiful eyes on the world" while we were together.

 

It really had no meaning when I said it , I just said it. My gf sneaked into messenger , saw the messages and stuff.

 

 

Point is my girlfriend lost my trust and it's been like that for like 8-10 months. It's been eating her , devastating her , she broke up a few times because of it.

 

This time she broke up saying I'm jealous too much , I just can't do it anymore. We break up , we get back together , break up and so on.

 

 

Now the hard thing is , I run track and so does she. We see each other every day. On that training session. And it's always like that.

 

 

We've seen each other few nights ago , to say the last words so to say. And we cried so much , both of us.

She knows I love her , and she loves me. We kissed so much as well. We just cried in a hug.

 

She knows I love her , but doesn't know if she's the ONLY ONE I want. And she truly is , I'd give the world to prove it.

 

Yesterday , we're walking home from training and she says: " Kiss your girlfriend" And I was confused , and I said "Girlfriend , really?" And she replied "Maybe.".

 

We went on home , and so on.

 

Today I told her in chat , I've got to tell you something , I miss you.

She says " Don't do this to us , don't torture us".

 

She is forcing herself to forget me and to not love me anymore.

 

She has said her herself.

 

 

Give me some advice what to do. Be there , or just stay away , which way will she realize that she cannot fight love. Because damn it I can't , I won't force myself to give her up. No matter how much it hurts me.

[ButterflyWrists]

You disrespected your relationship. Your ex tried to kiss you, yet you still thought it was fine to be friends with her. Your ex had feelings for you, you shared a compliment referring to when you were together. Damn right your now ex doesn't trust you. You should have ended the friendship when ex tried to kiss you.

[Levi821]

I did do it a month after , I really didn't end it because it was almost non existent at that point. My old ex and I had barely any contact at that point.

Then I started ignoring her around school and she did the same. That got my girlfriend even more mad. But yet I did it rather to make her feel better.

[Honeycomb8]

W t f. You screwed up and now your ex is hurting. Leave her alone. -_-

[Levi821]

See now you think the only one that is hurting is her.

 

I've never cheated on her , only thing that ever existed was my honesty that my ex tried to kiss me and that message.

 

But my recent ex , cheated on me. Broke up 5 times , 2 of those times she had another boyfriend and then left them for me.

 

Not once did I give up on her , so you cannot say she is the only one hurting.

[MissCanuck]

You lack insight into your own behaviour by minimizing and justifying it.

 

It's better for both of you this way as things were clearly not so good between you. You two should not have had multiple break-ups; your relationship just doesn't work and has met its inevitable end.

 

You both sound very young; how old are you?

[yatsue]

But my recent ex , cheated on me. Broke up 5 times , 2 of those times she had another boyfriend and then left them for me.

 

Not once did I give up on her , so you cannot say she is the only one hurting.

 

Yikes, and you want THIS back? I would face the music, because it's about time someone put an end to the madness that was your relationship.

[Levi821]

You lack insight into your own behaviour by minimizing and justifying it.

 

It's better for both of you this way as things were clearly not so good between you. You two should not have had multiple break-ups; your relationship just doesn't work and has met its inevitable end.

 

You both sound very young; how old are you?

 

We're both fairly young , I'll be 18 in May , she'll be 16.

[breener]

Levi, here's a bit of advice (coming from personal experience). An ex is an ex for some reason. When you are with someone else, all correspondences with ex's should end as all that leads to is conflicts and hurt feelings in your current relationship. If you have friends that are opposite genders, tread lightly and if you want to remain friends, don't keep that friendship hidden from your significant other. Again that leads to hurt feelings and conflict. If you can, introduce them to your new significant other and retain transparency ALWAYS.

 

When people break up and say "we can still be friends," that rarely works unless it is a special circumstance. And if you remain friends, be aware how much tension and conflict that may add to your existing relationship because it will happen.

 

If you are truly committed to your new significant other, then you should keep ex's in the past where they belong and don't give your new partner anything to worry about. Even if they perceive it as a threat and there isn't anything there.... that perception has been made and will be hard to shake.