STL Posted December 27, 2017 Share Posted December 27, 2017 Hey guys, I just went through a breakup and I don't know what to do. Sorry about the huge post. I was just in the best relationship of my life. Both me and my boyfriend were. Let's call him D. We had the best connection to each other and were both very happy together. We are both in our twenties and I thought this guy was going to be the one I ended up marrying and he told me the same thing a week or two before we broke up. I've known that he's been struggling with bipolar depression for quite a while. There was recently something that happened to a family member of his which sent him on a downward spiral and he ended up breaking up with me about a month and a half ago. His reasoning was that he cared way too much about me to see our relationship go to while he was busy dealing with his own issues. He said he couldn't give me the affection and care that I deserve and didn't want to make his issues my issues. While he was breaking up with me, he said he really wants to see us get back together and that he would be sad if I just stopped talking to him. So I stayed around because I wanted to be there for him through this rough time. We would still tell each other 'I love you' and acted as if nothing happened. Now, I feel like I'm pushing him away and I'm not sure how or why. We don't talk as much or as in depth as before and the breakup has been eating away at me. I couldn't stand to not talk to him every day. It would be a different story if we ended on bad terms, but we didn't. I know the fact that he is seeming distant is due to what he is going through, but I can't help but to feel like I am doing something wrong too. He is hesitant to see me in person and he just doesn't seem the same anymore. I'm not sure exactly how I should talk to him, which does seem stupid, given the fact that we had such a good connection and communication before. I confided in a friend of both me and D, J, telling him that I'm in a very low point of my life too, who then turned and told D that I said D was treating me badly. This made him mad at me for sucking him into drama that he has no energy to deal with and that made things worse. All of our friends (we have the same friends) have told him that it was stupid of him to break up with me, someone who they thought would be there for him 100% of the time. His reasoning is always, "well they don't know what's going through my head. I'm sure it makes no sense to you." I keep hearing from them as well that they think we will get back together, but I'm just so unsure about everything. How do I help him? How do I understand exactly what's going on? Or how should I even deal with this? It's eating me alive. He's too special to me to let go. He is perfect to me, and I know he cares about me the same. It's all just confusing. Again, sorry about the long text. Link to comment
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