Heartbroken.. Seeking advice to help me move on?

[Pto29538]

It's lovely to hear that time has helped you. It's always so hard to believe in time when you're in the thick of the pain. There was a time my ex and I broke up for around 3 months a couple of years ago, and I remember being depressed the entire time. I think that is part of why I'm worried about how long it will take me to heal. But, at the same time, I am in a very different place than I was 2 years ago and have a lot more context for our relationship and what did/didn't work about it. I'm hoping that I have more wisdom, perspective, and strength than I did that summer in college, because I do not want to be depressed for 3+ months again.

 

I know, stay NC!!!!! I'm trying so hard. I need to get to the gym, too. I haven't been able to because I can't eat. And I don't want to work out when I'm already losing a few pounds per week.

 

Even go out for a short walk instead of the gym . Try and eat small bits even if it's food thats not particularly good for you . Someone told me that if you are not eating your body goes into fight or flight mode so you become even more anxious . Get a liquid multivitamin as well . Your appetite will come back. Mine has . I think everyone takes a different amount of time so don't put pressure on yourself . It depends on your situation the length of the relationship your self esteem etc etc but as long as you make some strides to improvement you are in the way . I'm assuming I'm a lot older than you but going on tinder wouldn't do me any good for healing . It would make me miss him even more . When I was younger I did think that you needed a new man to get over the last but now I think to use this time to really look after and do things for your self and appreciate being on your own again . At the moment I couldn't dream of dating anyone else in the frame of mind I'm in but that is just me 😊

[Radiate21]

I've been eating mostly carbs it's very rare that I can't stomach bread, pasta, or french fries!

 

Y'all, I had such a moment over the weekend. I was on my second date with a nice guy and he asked me the simplest question. He asked me what I like to do on the weekends during the day. And it STUMPED me. I mean. All I could think about was how I've been wallowing in bed, watching Netflix, crying with my cats and talking to my mom on the phone every weekend for the last month. And then how before that I spent every weekend sleeping in with my ex, waking up and going to brunch, maybe going to the park, being lazy together and playing video games.

 

I realized that it's been so long since I've simply pursued hobbies and done stuff that makes me happy. Such a simple concept but I suppose my relationship was so comfortable and easy that I just preferred to spend most of my time at home with him. So, today I've been making lists of ideas for things I want to try doing in my spare time. Riding horses again, learning Spanish, joining an indoor climbing gym. Once I feel a little bit more interesting, maybe I'll start to appear more interesting to other people as well!

 

I know you all are reading this and thinking, of course, duh, of course you shouldn't be dating yet, but it was just such a moment of clarity for me!

 

I hope you are all doing well today

[Helpmesavethis]

I've been eating mostly carbs it's very rare that I can't stomach bread, pasta, or french fries!

 

Y'all, I had such a moment over the weekend. I was on my second date with a nice guy and he asked me the simplest question. He asked me what I like to do on the weekends during the day. And it STUMPED me. I mean. All I could think about was how I've been wallowing in bed, watching Netflix, crying with my cats and talking to my mom on the phone every weekend for the last month. And then how before that I spent every weekend sleeping in with my ex, waking up and going to brunch, maybe going to the park, being lazy together and playing video games.

 

I realized that it's been so long since I've simply pursued hobbies and done stuff that makes me happy. Such a simple concept but I suppose my relationship was so comfortable and easy that I just preferred to spend most of my time at home with him. So, today I've been making lists of ideas for things I want to try doing in my spare time. Riding horses again, learning Spanish, joining an indoor climbing gym. Once I feel a little bit more interesting, maybe I'll start to appear more interesting to other people as well!

 

I know you all are reading this and thinking, of course, duh, of course you shouldn't be dating yet, but it was just such a moment of clarity for me!

 

I hope you are all doing well today

 

That's great that you have realized you need to do things for you!!

 

 

I ride horses. Did you show or anything or just leisurely ride?

 

I'm feeling great this week. I think I MIGHT have gotten a lot out of my system last Friday after doing so well then having a bad day... Like maybe it was my last... I hope... He's still crossing my mind but nothing crazy like before. Shew... It's such a huge relief to feel this way when just a few weeks ago, I felt like life wasn't worth living anymore.. and not necessarily just because of him but from all the failed relationships and heartache from the past... This one was unexpected so it was like how do I deal with another one and how great he was and why did it end etc. Etc. Etc. You will all get here. Set your minds to it and go for it!!

[Pto29538]

I've been eating mostly carbs it's very rare that I can't stomach bread, pasta, or french fries!

 

Y'all, I had such a moment over the weekend. I was on my second date with a nice guy and he asked me the simplest question. He asked me what I like to do on the weekends during the day. And it STUMPED me. I mean. All I could think about was how I've been wallowing in bed, watching Netflix, crying with my cats and talking to my mom on the phone every weekend for the last month. And then how before that I spent every weekend sleeping in with my ex, waking up and going to brunch, maybe going to the park, being lazy together and playing video games.

 

I realized that it's been so long since I've simply pursued hobbies and done stuff that makes me happy. Such a simple concept but I suppose my relationship was so comfortable and easy that I just preferred to spend most of my time at home with him. So, today I've been making lists of ideas for things I want to try doing in my spare time. Riding horses again, learning Spanish, joining an indoor climbing gym. Once I feel a little bit more interesting, maybe I'll start to appear more interesting to other people as well!

 

I know you all are reading this and thinking, of course, duh, of course you shouldn't be dating yet, but it was just such a moment of clarity for me!

 

I hope you are all doing well today

 

That's very positive that you are making a list and had that self revelation about yourself . I think everyone is different so I wouldn't judge you on dating . I couldn't date yet as I would probably cry in front of him after a glass of wine and no matter who he was I know he would only make me miss my ex more but you might get something from it so that's just your approach . I prefer to just hang out with family and friends for now . I hope this hasn't scared me completely off me but I know I will be a while this time before I venture out again . This one hurt me real bad and I didn't expect it

[Pto29538]

That's great that you have realized you need to do things for you!!

 

 

I ride horses. Did you show or anything or just leisurely ride?

 

I'm feeling great this week. I think I MIGHT have gotten a lot out of my system last Friday after doing so well then having a bad day... Like maybe it was my last... I hope... He's still crossing my mind but nothing crazy like before. Shew... It's such a huge relief to feel this way when just a few weeks ago, I felt like life wasn't worth living anymore.. and not necessarily just because of him but from all the failed relationships and heartache from the past... This one was unexpected so it was like how do I deal with another one and how great he was and why did it end etc. Etc. Etc. You will all get here. Set your minds to it and go for it!!

 

You are such an inspiration to us all . Sometimes though I compare myself to you too much as I think we both split up around 7 weeks ago but I am no where as good as you . He still think lots of him and cry every evening for a good while and still talk too much about him to friends . Maybe it's just the way I'm built. I know I will get over him but it's go to be slow . I do a lot and keep myself busy but don't find too much fun in anything at the moment .

[Helpmesavethis]

Yes I are such an inspiration to us all . Sometimes though I compare myself to you too much as I think we both split up around 7 weeks ago but I am no where as good as you . He still think lots of him and cry every evening for a good while and still talk too much about him to friends . Maybe it's just the way I'm built. I know I will get over him but it's go to be slow . I do a lot and keep myself busy but don't find too much fun in anything at the moment .

 

The difference is the NC... Give yourself 7 weeks from when you text him last week and I bet you're in my position at that time... It'll take time but you'll get there. I can't imagine speaking, texting, etc at any time would have helped me in any way... That's why I'm doing so well...

[Radiate21]

That's great that you have realized you need to do things for you!!

 

 

I ride horses. Did you show or anything or just leisurely ride?

 

I'm feeling great this week. I think I MIGHT have gotten a lot out of my system last Friday after doing so well then having a bad day... Like maybe it was my last... I hope... He's still crossing my mind but nothing crazy like before. Shew... It's such a huge relief to feel this way when just a few weeks ago, I felt like life wasn't worth living anymore.. and not necessarily just because of him but from all the failed relationships and heartache from the past... This one was unexpected so it was like how do I deal with another one and how great he was and why did it end etc. Etc. Etc. You will all get here. Set your minds to it and go for it!!

 

Thank you Today is one of my stronger days and I know that there will be weaker ones ahead.

 

I've actually never done a show, but I've been riding on and off since I was about 9 years old. Hunter/jumper. I was on the equestrian team all four years in college but I never wanted to compete because I didn't like the idea of the pressure. I just adore horses and riding does a wonderful job of taking my mind off of things. I've always wanted to own horses. I saw earlier in the thread that you got/are getting a new horse? That's so amazing!! I don't know how I would logistically ever accomplish that but it's such a dream of mine. Don't you just love them???

 

I'm glad that you had a negativity detox the other day. Sometimes you just have to let it out! I think that's perfectly okay. My therapist told me, as long as you're going to work and being functional during the week, there's nothing wrong with spending a Saturday in bed. It's all about moderation and balance. It's okay to have those days. Hopefully it will indeed be one of your last

[Radiate21]

That's very positive that you are making a list and had that self revelation about yourself . I think everyone is different so I wouldn't judge you on dating . I couldn't date yet as I would probably cry in front of him after a glass of wine and no matter who he was I know he would only make me miss my ex more but you might get something from it so that's just your approach . I prefer to just hang out with family and friends for now . I hope this hasn't scared me completely off me but I know I will be a while this time before I venture out again . This one hurt me real bad and I didn't expect it

 

Thank you PTO

I think part of why I'm doing it is because...well...I think that more of the pain of this breakup comes from the fear of never finding someone as good/"better" than from actually missing him. Which is a weird thing to think about! We really weren't getting along towards the end and honestly a lot of my memories of him are pretty negative, so I'm not really thinking about all of our great times and feeling sad. I'm more thinking about his objective qualities and feeling sad. So seeking those qualities out in other people helps ease my mind in a way.

 

Regardless, I'm probably not ready to date yet.

 

Also, PTO, I agree with you that Helpme is such an inspiration, but you are an inspiration to me, too. Everyone heals at their own pace, and there are so many variables that play into how long it takes to recover, NC definitely being one of them, also self esteem, how whole you felt before the relationship, how much time you spent together, etc. There's just no way to compare two people's recoveries and I don't want you to think that you're failing in any way whatsoever. To me, you come across as very strong, mature, and wise, and I know that you will heal.

[Helpmesavethis]

Thank you Today is one of my stronger days and I know that there will be weaker ones ahead.

 

I've actually never done a show, but I've been riding on and off since I was about 9 years old. Hunter/jumper. I was on the equestrian team all four years in college but I never wanted to compete because I didn't like the idea of the pressure. I just adore horses and riding does a wonderful job of taking my mind off of things. I've always wanted to own horses. I saw earlier in the thread that you got/are getting a new horse? That's so amazing!! I don't know how I would logistically ever accomplish that but it's such a dream of mine. Don't you just love them???

 

I'm glad that you had a negativity detox the other day. Sometimes you just have to let it out! I think that's perfectly okay. My therapist told me, as long as you're going to work and being functional during the week, there's nothing wrong with spending a Saturday in bed. It's all about moderation and balance. It's okay to have those days. Hopefully it will indeed be one of your last

 

Yes, having horses is amazing. I have owned, ridden, and shown my entire life. It is my life. And they are the BEST therapy in the world. Definitely get back into it!! My daughter saw a therapist for 2 years after my divorce and she constantly raved about how good it was for her to have horses. They've helped ole mom out a lot too. Haha.

 

I do feel great. I know I'm "allowed" to have bad days and they more irritate me now than anything because I've been doing so well... So I'm going to try my best not to have another! Keep pushing forward!

[Pto29538]

The difference is the NC... Give yourself 7 weeks from when you text him last week and I bet you're in my position at that time... It'll take time but you'll get there. I can't imagine speaking, texting, etc at any time would have helped me in any way... That's why I'm doing so well...

 

That's a very good point . I still don't regret the texts as I needed to do it for me but I'm sure it didn't help alright . Hopefully I will come to that good place where you are soon .

[Schockobaerin]

Hi! Well for me it have been 8 weeks since BU and after LC 5 weeks of NC, the exbf has a new job, but had been very passive on fb, I miss him very much and still have hope.. BUT I must say that NC is the best choice, I had grown a lot, and slowly Im getting better and Im forgetting him, lets see what the future has for me, but one thing is for sure, I need to love myself and this experience is making me stronger, and if doesnt come back, well his loss.. Just stay NC and dont accept breadcrumbs, its going to get better, nobody is worth our suffering, this is for us, to grieve properly and to come stronger and better This situation is not linear, I advance 3 steps to fall down 2 back... Allow yourself to be sad and grieve, take your time for it.. Im still grieving, but slowly Im healing.. Just keep doing it !

[Helpmesavethis]

That's a very good point . I still don't regret the texts as I needed to do it for me but I'm sure it didn't help alright . Hopefully I will come to that good place where you are soon .

 

I totally understand why you did it. I did it too but mine didn't reply at all so.. I had nothing to give me any type of false hope etc. You'll get there. I'm not 100% by any means but I'm a good 75--80... Well on my way!!

[Helpmesavethis]

Hi! Well for me it have been 8 weeks since BU and after LC 5 weeks of NC, the exbf has a new job, but had been very passive on fb, I miss him very much and still have hope.. BUT I must say that NC is the best choice, I had grown a lot, and slowly Im getting better and Im forgetting him, lets see what the future has for me, but one thing is for sure, I need to love myself and this experience is making me stronger, and if doesnt come back, well his loss.. Just stay NC and dont accept breadcrumbs, its going to get better, nobody is worth our suffering, this is for us, to grieve properly and to come stronger and better This situation is not linear, I advance 3 steps to fall down 2 back... Allow yourself to be sad and grieve, take your time for it.. Im still grieving, but slowly Im healing.. Just keep doing it !

 

You're doing great and I totally agree. To heal and work on ourselves. To love ourselves and know our self worth... You have to go NC. If he comes back and things can be worked out great. And you're a better person on top of it. Keep on trucking forward!!

[Radiate21]

Well I just worked out for the first time since the BU. It was tough because we used to work out together. Or if I worked out alone he'd be there when I came home, run to the door like a puppy to greet me all cute and give me a hug. I guess a lot of firsts after a BU are hard. I cried the first time I went to the grocery store. I actually have been too scared to go back since then. I didn't think working out would bring up so many thoughts it's the first time I've genuinely missed him and his cuteness in a while.

[Radiate21]

Ooh also, Helpme, I am so interested in your knowledge on owning horses! Do you think it's something a single 23-yr-old living across the country from her family in a small apartment could do?? Obviously I'd board it somewhere else

Maybe we could DM about it? If you're willing

[mcnugget]

Well I just worked out for the first time since the BU. It was tough because we used to work out together. Or if I worked out alone he'd be there when I came home, run to the door like a puppy to greet me all cute and give me a hug. I guess a lot of firsts after a BU are hard. I cried the first time I went to the grocery store. I actually have been too scared to go back since then. I didn't think working out would bring up so many thoughts it's the first time I've genuinely missed him and his cuteness in a while.

 

I'm sending you hugs. I feel that way all the time. There are so many things that I did with him and places that we went together. Everything triggers a memory. Sometimes I find myself crying over the silliest things.

 

Today I woke up feeling numb. I go through moments of numbness and I don't know how I feel about it. I want to reach out and invite him to get together, but I'm terrified that he might say no. I feel if I wait too long everything will slip away and he will forget how wonderful we were together. I was in such a rush for us to move to the next phase... get engaged, married, and have kids. If it isn't with him, I no longer care about dating, marriage, or anything. I'm just over it. I feel abandoned by my best friend of 18 years who has hardly answered my calls and pretty much blew me off when I flew across the country to see her. I feel completely rejected by my cousin who I was always close to, who won't even return my calls because he knows I'm going through a breakup and doesn't want to "deal with it." I've been keeping busy and to the outside world it looks like I'm having a blast, but I feel nothing at all. I just go between emptiness and complete sadness. I've lost my soulmate, partner, best friend, and family member.

[Helpmesavethis]

Ooh also, Helpme, I am so interested in your knowledge on owning horses! Do you think it's something a single 23-yr-old living across the country from her family in a small apartment could do?? Obviously I'd board it somewhere else

Maybe we could DM about it? If you're willing

 

Yes, I absolutely think it's something you can do. Feel free to pm me.

[Helpmesavethis]

I'm sending you hugs. I feel that way all the time. There are so many things that I did with him and places that we went together. Everything triggers a memory. Sometimes I find myself crying over the silliest things.

 

Today I woke up feeling numb. I go through moments of numbness and I don't know how I feel about it. I want to reach out and invite him to get together, but I'm terrified that he might say no. I feel if I wait too long everything will slip away and he will forget how wonderful we were together. I was in such a rush for us to move to the next phase... get engaged, married, and have kids. If it isn't with him, I no longer care about dating, marriage, or anything. I'm just over it. I feel abandoned by my best friend of 18 years who has hardly answered my calls and pretty much blew me off when I flew across the country to see her. I feel completely rejected by my cousin who I was always close to, who won't even return my calls because he knows I'm going through a breakup and doesn't want to "deal with it." I've been keeping busy and to the outside world it looks like I'm having a blast, but I feel nothing at all. I just go between emptiness and complete sadness. I've lost my soulmate, partner, best friend, and family member.

 

I have been fortunate to have tremendous friend support. I'm sorry that the people you feel closest to have shut you out. I was afraid of mine avoiding me and that's part of the reason why I came here.

 

I still think you need to leave your guy alone. Give him time to think, time to miss you. Allow yourself to heal some. Become a better you. I too would put on a happy face and let the world think everything was ok when it wasn't... But eventually it became ok... Keep going out and doing what you're doing but also allow yourself to grieve all you need. I'd go out and then come home and cry myself to sleep. It will get better. You can get thru this. Stay strong!!!

[Pto29538]

Well I just worked out for the first time since the BU. It was tough because we used to work out together. Or if I worked out alone he'd be there when I came home, run to the door like a puppy to greet me all cute and give me a hug. I guess a lot of firsts after a BU are hard. I cried the first time I went to the grocery store. I actually have been too scared to go back since then. I didn't think working out would bring up so many thoughts it's the first time I've genuinely missed him and his cuteness in a while.

 

Yes the first time you do everything is so hard and it may even be monotonous stuff . There is places I have avoided going since as I know it will be the first time there without him . There are reminders everywhere but the more we face and do these things I hope I the second time won't be as bad . I was lucky my guy lived in a nearby town and then didn't live with him so a lot of the places and things we did there I will never have to do my own so there is a lot of those first things that I can avoid . Today I'm very down and crying a lot . I think for the last number of weeks I was focusing on us having a breakup conversation so even around his fathers sickness and death we weren't in touch but there was the hope of knowledge that we would be in touch afterwards. Now that's gone and there is nothing only the reality that he isn't coming back . It's just so different being single and I was only with him 10 months . I'm lucky I've friends and family but there is a loss and a gap there in my life that I'm grieving for . This is the worst day I've had in weeks . I'm hoping I'm just hormonal and that it will pass. I'm going to go for a walk this evening to clear my head and hopefully cheer me up

[Pto29538]

I'm sending you hugs. I feel that way all the time. There are so many things that I did with him and places that we went together. Everything triggers a memory. Sometimes I find myself crying over the silliest things.

 

Today I woke up feeling numb. I go through moments of numbness and I don't know how I feel about it. I want to reach out and invite him to get together, but I'm terrified that he might say no. I feel if I wait too long everything will slip away and he will forget how wonderful we were together. I was in such a rush for us to move to the next phase... get engaged, married, and have kids. If it isn't with him, I no longer care about dating, marriage, or anything. I'm just over it. I feel abandoned by my best friend of 18 years who has hardly answered my calls and pretty much blew me off when I flew across the country to see her. I feel completely rejected by my cousin who I was always close to, who won't even return my calls because he knows I'm going through a breakup and doesn't want to "deal with it." I've been keeping busy and to the outside world it looks like I'm having a blast, but I feel nothing at all. I just go between emptiness and complete sadness. I've lost my soulmate, partner, best friend, and family member.

 

I'm so sorry that your friend and cousin are not supporting you . I'm lucky to have supportive friends and family although I do know at times they want to shake me as we can often repeat ourselves and feel sorry for ourselves and can't talk about anything but our ex. We often don't ask or really care what is going on in their lives . That is me I'm talking about anyways . I have become quite self absorbed as I can't see much outside my grief . I've had some friends as well who have avoided me and I think they just can't handle me or my emotions . I think they don't want to be dragged down or something or maybe they just don't understand. I have tried not to judge them too much as one of them is a girl who doesn't go out much with men so I know she doesn't understand why I would grieve so much . You do have this forum don't forget and you can say what you want on this and without judgement . You mention that you don't want to meet or marry anyone else . For now that's fine . I don't want to date anymore either . For now that is fine and if in the future one day we are stronger we might change our mind

[Schockobaerin]

I'm sending you hugs. I feel that way all the time. There are so many things that I did with him and places that we went together. Everything triggers a memory. Sometimes I find myself crying over the silliest things.

 

Today I woke up feeling numb. I go through moments of numbness and I don't know how I feel about it. I want to reach out and invite him to get together, but I'm terrified that he might say no. I feel if I wait too long everything will slip away and he will forget how wonderful we were together. I was in such a rush for us to move to the next phase... get engaged, married, and have kids. If it isn't with him, I no longer care about dating, marriage, or anything. I'm just over it. I feel abandoned by my best friend of 18 years who has hardly answered my calls and pretty much blew me off when I flew across the country to see her. I feel completely rejected by my cousin who I was always close to, who won't even return my calls because he knows I'm going through a breakup and doesn't want to "deal with it." I've been keeping busy and to the outside world it looks like I'm having a blast, but I feel nothing at all. I just go between emptiness and complete sadness. I've lost my soulmate, partner, best friend, and family member.

 

Ahh Darling, I feel like you, there is not a day where I dont think about him or miss him, but slowly im getting better, at the very deep of my soul I think he is coming back, BUT I want to get rid of that hope, because if he would come back and I hadnt change, I would get hurt again, and its not fair to myself.. I understand you, I published today some pics on fb, expecting a like and he did it, everybody was praising my beauty, I just hope he could see really not only how beautiful I am, and I dont mean outside, but inside and regret what had he lost.. I shouldnt care, but still do and really need to get indiferent of him... Im still not yet there, but Im not crying as much as before, its going to get better, I really hope, Im going to trust another person in the future to open my heart, because I deserve better.. And if comes back, he needs really to see that Im not the same idiot as before and that he has to compromise, and not only that, but I must learn not to give my heart away so easily and get a little "cold".. We dont know what the future has for us.

We are living the same experience, and this was my first ever BU, my first love died and I never doubted his love, and now after so many years and fears, when I thought I opened my heart to a man who was ready, well he wasnt... My exbf has still a lot of baggage of his past relationship and need some growing up to do, and for that he correctly guessed he needed to be alone. Its sad because I can see our potential, but if he doesnt, I just must give him up... Its hard, but somehow Im going to do it.. About yours, give it time to heal, you must heal and then lets see what happens, and remember you are not alone on your way, we are millions, who got our heart broken, and we are going to survive A big hug!

[allisonnm]

So honestly, I'm in the same position as you, but it's been a little longer for me. Me ex broke up with me out of the blue about 3 months ago. When it happened, it was the worst thing that had ever happened to me. I cried myself to sleep and never thought I'd find someone like him ever again. i asked on here, just like you, and everyone told me the same thing "it gets better." i didn't believe them, until it happened. it got better. it just takes some time. i stopped checking his social media. he missed my graduation and my birthday and then realized he's not worth it. someone will come into your life that IS worth it and is there for you and cares about you. i haven't found anyone new, but i have enjoyed being on my own for a little. i hope you do the same and realize there is someone out there that will care for you and make you happy. my friends probably got tired of me as well but when something happens in their life, you will definitely be there for them and that's the point of friends

[Radiate21]

Hi all I haven't gone through and read the most recent messages yet but I just had to post right now because it's late here and everyone is asleep and I am livid.

 

I came across my ex on tinder and he is using a photo of the two of us at his brother's wedding, didn't even crop me out.

 

?!?!?!????!!?!?!?

 

HOW CAN THIS MATTER SO LITTLE TO HIM THAT HE CAN JUST DO THAT WITHOUT FEELING ANY SORT OF GUILT OR SADNESS OR ANYTHING???

 

I can't believe he's parading a photo of us in front of a bunch of girls as bait.

 

Jesus.

 

Rant finished. Hope you're all doing better than I am.

[Helpmesavethis]

Hi all I haven't gone through and read the most recent messages yet but I just had to post right now because it's late here and everyone is asleep and I am livid.

 

I came across my ex on tinder and he is using a photo of the two of us at his brother's wedding, didn't even crop me out.

 

?!?!?!????!!?!?!?

 

HOW CAN THIS MATTER SO LITTLE TO HIM THAT HE CAN JUST DO THAT WITHOUT FEELING ANY SORT OF GUILT OR SADNESS OR ANYTHING???

 

I can't believe he's parading a photo of us in front of a bunch of girls as bait.

 

Jesus.

 

Rant finished. Hope you're all doing better than I am.

 

Ok, so why are you on Tinder? For yourself or to see if he's on there? I hope for yourself... Otherwise, stay off of there!! Regardless, he's dumb, insensitive, stupid to think another girl will be interested with you there, etc. I'm sorry you saw that but I hope you weren't looking for something... When we look, we are likely most of the time not going to like what we see... So why look?!?! It hurts more. And.... I've said it a hundred times and I'm going to say it again.... I'll never understand how people can do other people like some of these have done us. Hang in there..

[Pto29538]

Hi all I haven't gone through and read the most recent messages yet but I just had to post right now because it's late here and everyone is asleep and I am livid.

 

I came across my ex on tinder and he is using a photo of the two of us at his brother's wedding, didn't even crop me out.

 

?!?!?!????!!?!?!?

 

HOW CAN THIS MATTER SO LITTLE TO HIM THAT HE CAN JUST DO THAT WITHOUT FEELING ANY SORT OF GUILT OR SADNESS OR ANYTHING???

 

I can't believe he's parading a photo of us in front of a bunch of girls as bait.

 

Jesus.

 

Rant finished. Hope you're all doing better than I am.

 

You are on tinder as well and that doesn't mean you are happy or over him so I wouldn't be assuming that he is in great happy place either, As for using a photo of you in it is very insensitive and stupid , No woman on tinder wants to see a man with a photo of his ex . I would suggest you get off tinder and focus on yourself , Facebook tinder and all these social media things only serve to worsen our heartbreak , I would only go back on Tinder at a point in time when I know it I saw my ex on it I wouldn't be devastated. I am sorry you had to see this, I can't imagine how heartbreaking it is to see but it may help you get a bit annoyed at him and push you to get over him a bit quicker