Gf living with her daughters dad

[Stevetroe]

Hi, i have started dating a woman around 6 months ago. She has a 2 year old daughter from her previous relationship(terrible relationship). She has been broken up with him but continuing to live there even though there are options for her. She says its because she wont see her daughter every day, she has bills to pay before she can leave, etc.

She tells me she wants to marry my and she loves me and only me and there is no connection with her ex at all. She still cleans his house, does his laundry, cooks his meals, and takes care of her daughter when he isnt home. I have told her that this is not acceptable and i am unsure about how long i can deal with it. She says soon she will move out, for the past 3 months, i am still certain that i want to be with her as we have had an amazing connection and aside from her living situation it is the best love i have ever experienced.

How do i get her to leave her exes house and move on and make the commitment when she says she is there because of her daughter and knowing she wont be seeing her nearly as often?

[gebaird]

How do i get her to leave her exes house and move on and make the commitment when she says she is there because of her daughter and knowing she wont be seeing her nearly as often?

 

The "bills to pay" excuse is easy to solve, in theory. It's just a matter of coming up with the money. But the "won't see her daughter every day" is impossible to solve, and to me it indicates an unwillingness to EVER move out.

 

I'd give her an ultimatum. If she wants to be with you, she needs to move out by x date. I'm guessing she'll choose to stay, because I think she is playing with you (perhaps unintentionally). If you do nothing, she may still be living with her ex a year from now.

 

Right now she can have her cake and eat it to. Her romantic needs are fulfilled by you, and she gets to be with her daughter every day. But the fact that you are posting this tells me you aren't okay with the situation. I think it's important for you to take a firm stance; otherwise she'll continue to lie to you (and to herself) about what she really wants.

[Matt3939]

I don't know the age's of the people involved but I'd say if you are old enough to have a child you are old enough to take care of them. Alone if need be. How long ago was there breakup? I'd see if she's serious about moving out by herself. She might just be looking to leap frog into moving in with you. I'd caution against that. Breakups are horrible enough. Even worse with children involved. You would think if she was serious she wouldn't want to be near that guy and vise versa on his end.

[Wiseman2]

Sorry to hear this, but she's not ready to date, no matter how bad she claims their relationship is. So many red flags. Dating 6 mos and lives with bf!? Wants to marry you!?

 

They are a couple and you are sort of the other man. Surely you've never been to her house, except maybe when he's not around? Sorry but she's cheating on her bf/baby-daddy and stringing you along.

She has been broken up with him but continuing to live there even though there are options for her. She tells me she wants to marry my.She still cleans his house, does his laundry, cooks his meals, and takes care of her daughter when he isnt home.

[ShatteredMan]

Stevetroe: "this is the best love i have ever experienced"? in 6 months? This woman is playing you, man.

 

Leave this situation immediately. I don't know how old you are or what your background is but this is going to turn into an emotional @#$% show of biblical proportions.