Need input from women and men. Please help!

[elbandido]

It's me again. Since my last post I have more news. On Wednesday, my ex and I went to get a tattoo for her. it took like 3 hrs and we didn't get out of the place until about 1:40am. We then went to my place and she stayed another hour because she needed to clean it. I helped her clean the thing and then she left. Everything felt better as if cleaning her wound and being there for her all night somehow made her feel good and loved. The next night she came over at around 7pm. We again cleaned her tattoo and then she got undressed. Completely undressed and put on a t-shirt of mine. I told her how hot she looked and I could see her smiling like she liked it. She then told me we are just friends and if I can't handle it, she will put her clothes back on. I said no and we proceeded to lay together in my bed. We were both so tired from being up so late the previous night, that we decided to take a nap. I undressed down to my boxers and decided to give her a massage. I rubbed baby oil all over her. I rubbed her butt and legs and she had no problem. Mind you, she is naked the whole time. Well eventually (after like an hour or so) we cuddled in bed and slept for a while.

Later that night, around midnight, she got up and started getting ready to leave. Before she left I asked her to take the ring (the one I think I mentioned in my previous post. If not then here it is: I bought her a ring a week ago. I proposed to her and she said no. Got mad and said not to ask her that again). This time though, she took the ring, but said only as a friend. She wanted to make it clear that it was only as a friend. I agreed. Now, that was Thursday. This weekend she is at her brother's house dogsitting for the weekend. Friday night we spoke briefly and she didn't seem as jolly as before. Today (Saturday) she came over with her brother's dog.

When she walked through the door I went to greet her and give her a hug. She stepped back and said that we are just friends and if I can't accept it, then she will just leave. She was so cold. I asked why are you being like this, she said because she doesn't want me to get the wrong idea. She said if the ring was an intent to try and get her back, then I can have it back. I said no. We exchanged a few more words. I got ready and we left. We took the dog back to her brother's home and then we went miniature golfing. We had a lousy time because I wasn't into the game. I was just moping around. Eventually, she just dropped me off back at my house.

I don't know what to do or think. One day I am feeling good, then next I am lousy. She keeps insisting that we are friends and there is no way we will get back together. She says she can't put up with my crying about the situation and says no one else would be so nice; they would have just ended it and wouldn't want to be friends. When I tell her not to call me, she gets mad and says she doesn't want me out of her life, but then says if that what I want then fine. She seems so cold and unloving. She says I can call her. Says she needs time for herself and says she is sick of our relationship, but not sick of me. Says she has outgrown "us" and just wants to be friends.

I know I am overwhelming at times. I write her letters and then read them to her, but the fact is I don't want to be without her.

Can someone make any sense of all this? I hope so. Does anyone think there is still a chance, or is all hope gone? Help!

[Vlycero]

she doesnt know what she wants...let her make the next move on you, or make a mistake like I did.

 

 

Last week my fiance told me she wanted to be alone but we would still live together until the end of June, she let me hold her at night when we shared the same bed etc... but then every day she would tell me its over and that I still have to move out.

 

Wednesday was our 3 yr anniversary...I tried to be loving, she got mad, I had a drink...and she says that she got scared because I grabbed her arms and kept telling her that I love her, I wasnt drunk but she said I was because I woke her up at 3am to tell her that im still in love with her and want to try and work on things and see what happens in the next couple weeks

 

She never came back home or got in contact with me since then, now yesterday a police man came to our apartment and served me with an injunction and forced me to leave my home, and all my stuff behind...and have no contact with her whatsoever for 15 days until the hearing.

 

Whatever you do, dont pressure the situation...let her make up her mind, or you will end up homeless like me... Fortunately a buddy took me in for now...but my fiance has all my money and I will probably never see it again

[RedWolf]

Shes leading you on. Get away from her and stay away no matter how much it hurts. I would get your ring back too. Just get away from her, you know shes using you. Good luck!

[bzborow1]

with a girl like that, you have a better chance at getting her back (assuming you would even want to) by playing hard with her. Tell her you want the ring back, friends don't give each other rings. Also, if she plays games with you next time like she did. Tell her to put her clothes on and leave.

 

Be strong man. Her actions are daring you to be strong, she's practically challenging your strength.

[hopeful_heart]

Wow, I may have missed a lot not having seen your other posts but from this one, all I can say is WHAT? What in the world are you doing? You sound like a caring guy who is holding on to a dream, not reality. Sounds to me like this girl doesn't deserve a single breath of air you have to give her. I hope I don't sound mean here but I used to be you, I used to hold on to dreams, let men walk all over me and come back for more. While this situaiton is reversed, there is someone out there who would have taken that ring, thrown their arms around your neck with eyes full of tears and realize how lucky they are to have you in love with them. If you showed this girl that you were able to move on, it may become an alarm to her that she's about to lose you and make her move back towards you at which point you hold the ball in deciding if she's worth another go. On the other hand, you decide to move on and leave her in the dust, finding that girl. Either way, you come out the winner, not the broken-hearted guy you sound like now. Easier said than done, I know! But ultimately, life is what you let it be. The first several months will probably be incredibly painful but aren't they painful now? At least enduring pain of letting go is propelling you in a direction where you get a fresh start with someone who will ultimately be what you need. Believe in you. That's my advice...

 

Melissa

[NNIgelb1]

i think you should check out a thing called doc love , it's on link removed, in brief he says that women will always dump men that cling to them and don't leave them alone, buy flowers the first couple dates etc. you have sealed your doom by chasing her. never do this man