Ex Girlfriend

[baseball211]

I've posted about this a lot but I just keep having questions and problems about it. Anyways, me and my ex have been broken up for 4 weeks (she broke up with me because she "lost feelings for me" despite me being "the perfect guy"). The two weeks after the breakup we texted just a tiny bit like maybe a total of 20 texts between the two of us. I haven't talked to her in 2 weeks (no contact) and my first question is how long should I continue NC? My second is when we do start talking should I try to build up here attraction to me for several months and then ask her out? Or is there something that works better?

[SkellyWoozle]

Indefinitely. She broke up with you. Don't pester her - it won't do you any favours. If she wants to get in touch, she will.

[Wiseman2]

Unfortunately you can not 'build her attraction" if there isn't any and she hasn't contacted you.

 

The more you follow the PUA and "get your ex back" propaganda, the only thing you will "build up" false is hope and be hurt again and again.

My second is when we do start talking should I try to build up here attraction to me for several months and then ask her out?

Same girl?

[moodindigo91]

Stay no contact unless she contacts you, and even if she contacts you, I'd say stay no contact. You can't build up someone's attraction for you intentionally. Attraction build up happens organically, and her attraction for you have done the opposite. It completely broke down. There's nothing for you to build up even if you could.

[dave_1966]

No contact is for you to heal to meet another woman, not to get her back. It's over, forever. You stay no contact with her for the rest of your life. The next woman you meet will want you to be over your ex, and not have her sniffing about.

[SheGoneMan]

Hey man I've been in your shoes. Our situation is literally exactly the same (read your other posts) except we didn't get back together after the break up like you guys did. She wanted to be friends saying she didn't want to lose me and maybe we can try again in the future and all that BS. My mind was an absolute mess for a good 2 months if not more.

 

When summer break came (about a month after the break up) I didn't have to see her anymore. Didn't send one text to her (actually deleted her number too) and it was a pretty good time especially since I spent the whole summer with my friends.

 

I'm gonna be honest man. Just let it go. Go NC and let the whole thing go. I guarantee in about a month or two you will look back at this post and have a different outlook on it. Live your life and realize that she doesn't want you. Which is totally fine because if she doesn't want to be in your life then let her go. And if she wanted to, she would try to get back in contact again. But you have to realize that might not even happen. She walked out on you so why bother trying to chase her anymore.

 

Time heals all wounds. I'm gonna admit it's been 5-6 months since the breakup (I'm back in school btw, no classes with her), and whenever I catch her looking at me on campus and our eyes meet its like a shock going through my body. But everything else is fine. Im not always laying in bed thinking about her all the time, etc.

 

Trust me I was coming up with ideas of how me and her should hang out and how I would build up her attraction again. But then I just dropped it because I'm not in the position to be asking those things anyway. Just don't worry about it man. Let it go and move on. Good luck