Wasting 20s so far

[Lotusavx]

i feel like I have been wasting my 20s so far...and I'm only just turned 21 a month ago. Here's why I feel i have wasted being 20 and potentially going to waste 21..at 18 I moved in with my boyfriend (now ex) of 4 years. We just broke up. I didn't go to college right after high school, since I didn't know exactly what I wanted to do. I had lots of friends in high school but after graduating they all went to schools far away, so I just had my 2 closest child hood friends to hangout with through my relationship. So basically I feel like I put everything into my relationship and forgot about myself and even my close friends. I basically just worked for the past 3 years after high school, lived with my boyfriend, and had a rocky relationship with him, and with myself as I struggled badly with self esteem issues. So this is why I feel like I haven't lived up to the full potential of being young..I feel like I wasted it so far being in a difficult relationship, neglecting my own needs and goals. Which I had no idea what my goals were, but so far, are just to try college for a year (1 year program) and see if I have any direction in what I want to do from there, and have a steady group of friends. And gain more confidence. I feel happy I have these small goals so far, but I'm afraid time will go so fast. Any advice? Thanks a lot

[Wiseman2]

Now that you are rid of him and wasting money playing house, you can attend uni, advance your career or do whatever you want. The sky's the limit now without this ball and chain. You can't go backwards and regret is a huge waste of mental energy and time. Look to an exciting new future.

at 18 I moved in with my boyfriend. I basically just worked for the past 3 years after high school, lived with my boyfriend, and had a rocky relationship with him

[lostandhurt]

My advice is not to be so hard on yourself. Do you know there are people in the 40's and 50's in the same boat as you?

 

You haven't wasted anything because you have learned a great deal over these last few years. Would have it been better to rush off to college not knowing what you wanted to do or the direction you wanted your life to go? I don't think so. That would have been time wasted as well as a lot of money.

 

You have a great plan laid out so write it down and post in the fridge or bathroom mirror so you see it every day. Look into fields that interest you so while you are getting your general education knocked out the first year of college you can be researching careers. Once in college you can also speak to a counselor about possible careers.

 

Rebuilding friendships and making new ones is always a good thing. Your life should never be just about one thing.

 

I think you are doing great

 

Lost

[DoF]

Make yourself priority. That's #1.

 

Forget about your friends, friends come and go (clealy your friends went to better themselves).

 

Write it off as a mistake, you should've went to school. But it's not too late, start now.

 

Stay away from yoru Ex FOREVER, it's done and over with. Actually, working on yoruself/education will be a great way to get your mind off him during healing/recovery.

 

Put ALL of the effort into yourself.

 

Set your mind to "I can and will do it". Never forget what Henry Ford said "Whether you think you can or whether you think you can't, you are right"

 

Good luck