Confusing girl..

[HelpAware]

Basics:

 

Girl and me, said we loved each other, she said she needed space, gave her space for 1 month, she broke the silence by sending me a I said she was beautiful and to tell me what she wanted, only friends, nothing more. I then messaged her saying I missed her.

 

I heard nothing from her until Saturday (3 weeks later) when she dropped me a message, we started talking, but the whole conversation revolved around her and her problems. She asked nothing directly about anything I had been doing apart from her initial message of 'How are you?'

 

As soon as I mentioned something to do with myself she didn't reply...

 

It's now 3 days later since our convo. I really loved this girl, I don't feel that strongly now cause she has really hurt me. I want to speak with her but she wants everything on her terms, I don't want to message her for her to not reply (again!).

 

It's as if whenever I want to speak she won't reply but as soon as she messages me, she expects me to reply to her and her problems.

 

I want to help her and I do care about her but I feel she is using me, as she knows I'm gonna be there.

 

I am here because I want to go out for drinks with her, I want to see her in person, I am still pining over her. Reluctantly she has a piece of my heart. My head knows I shouldn't care and should stay away but my heart

 

My question is really, how do I message her and ask to meet without sounding desperate? I don't think I am desperate, I just probably feel rejected as I gave her so much of me. Rollercoaster ride but I wanna hang with her!

 

Cheers

[mhowe]

You would seem desperate and kinda a wimp. She is treating you like dirt.

[Dottieflanogon]

I don't think there is anything confusing about her. Her actions clearly indicates that she isn't interested in you romantically, but she also does not like you as a friend- Nor does she respect you.Do yourself a huge favor and distance yourself from her and find people who are worthy of your friendship.

[HelpAware]

You would seem desperate and kinda a wimp. She is treating you like dirt.

 

I know man. It sucks.

[HelpAware]

I don't think there is anything confusing about her. Her actions clearly indicates that she isn't interested in you romantically, but she also does not like you as a friend- Nor does she respect you.Do yourself a huge favor and distance yourself from her and find people who are worthy of your friendship.

 

How does she not like me as a friend? I don't get why she bothered to chat with me for a couple hours and the next day. What are her reasons?

[Dottieflanogon]

She's exhibiting the typical signs of a false friend

 

-whole conversation revolved around her and her problems

-she wants everything on her terms

-As soon as you mentioned something to do with yourself she didn't reply(Doesn't care about your well being )

 

She's demonstrating what "users" do to control people that they truly don't care about or are so self-absorbed that they cannot comprehend the fact that they only think of themselves. You're clearly being taken for a ride. She's using you. Ignore her and let her fumble her way through her needs. Move on

[HelpAware]

She's exhibiting the typical signs of a false friend

 

-whole conversation revolved around her and her problems

-she wants everything on her terms

-As soon as you mentioned something to do with yourself she didn't reply(Doesn't care about your well being )

 

She's demonstrating what "users" do to control people that they truly don't care about or are so self-absorbed that they cannot comprehend the fact that they only think of themselves. You're clearly being taken for a ride. She's using you. Ignore her and let her fumble her way through her needs. Move on

 

This is so true. Thank you so much for this!

[JeckyllNHyde]

If she really loves you, and you love her it shouldn't be that confusing. Her actions are speaking loud and clear.

I would just give it time or walk away. By giving it time, I mean: keep busy and do your own thing (work/school/friends/hobbies) until you feel her intentions are more clear. Also, a relationship should be 2 people both interested in each other. If you're feeling used, you probably are OR she is way too self absorbed. I don't think being with someone like that is fair on you in the long run.

[JeckyllNHyde]

How does she not like me as a friend? I don't get why she bothered to chat with me for a couple hours and the next day. What are her reasons?

She could be lonely. No one else available to talk about her problems with at that moment. She knows you will really listen and make her feel heard. Then when she gets what she wants she ignores you.