Asking for any form of direction/advice

[OneRainyDay]

This has been a rough year for me. My grandmother passed away. Broke up with my girlfriend, and I lost my job. I'm back home with my family in attempt to piece myself back together, but I'm battling a few demons since a lot has happened at once, for me. I've always struggled with depression/anxiety, and recent events have really triggered these inner struggles. My grandfather will pass soon as well, and it is really having an impact on my parents and I'm slightly unable to provide support since I'm so lost in my own sorrows. I'm not really sure what to do with myself as of now. I went on a trip recently which was fun, but now that I'm back, I'm unsure if I should maybe get a part-time job, or continue to utilize my time off to heal myself. I struggle with mindfulness and meditation sometimes, and I'm a bit of a drinker. I like to have a few beverages at the end of the day, which I'm also aware of as not being the healthiest of choices. I've had a couple posts recently in another topic, and the responses have been wonderful. I guess I'm basically just wondering how different people cope with loss, misfortunes, depression, anxiety, etc. I understand that the path to feeling better is a long back-and-forth road, but part of me feels like I'm just doing something wrong with myself. Is too much free time polluting my thoughts? Will a job make me feel too stuck back at home? What are some helpful ways to better oneself while they have the freedom to do so before thinking about future jobs, relationships, locations, etc.? Depression is tricky, but I don't want to fall victim.

[SooSad33]

I hit my 'rock bottom' a couple of yrs ago when I lost 2 grama's and a cousin. Also, I was working in a VERY emotional kind of job where I witnessed many people 'losing' their loved ones and seeing those stuck in wheel chairs etc. was quite a difficult job- but I did enjoy 'helping' them all.

Eventually it all took it's toll on me when my partner was caught lying & cheating and my depression & anxiety sky rocketed and i lost it.

 

It has taken much time to work on 'me'. I ended up in my dr's office more than once, broken and she put me on anti depr and anxiety med's. As well., i attended therapy. Single and group. (for about a year).

 

Yes, it does take time.. but sometimes we DO need to back away from things and work on our own 'mental health'.

 

I think it's pretty much up to you to figure out what it is, YOU need to do.

Maybe you do need some mental down-time to keep working on yourself. To have your life settle down a bit, again, in order to be able to move along at a better pace?

 

I do suggest you look into talking with your dr about some prof help.. therapy? Even group therapy is good. We worked on mindfullness, dealing with our emotions How to cope with anxiety..etc.

 

Think about it.. how do you feel?

 

Tc

[mhowe]

Focus on something other than yourself. You can heal while working. Stop drinking as it adds to depression and anxiety.

Eat healthy, exercise and meditate.

[abitbroken]

Definitely work. The longer you sit out, the harder it will be for you to get back in. Sometimes getting into a routine helps us with grief. The simple act of HAVING to get up in the morning to report to someone else keeps us sane. If you are using free time to drink beer and wallow - yes, free time is polluting you.

 

Also, is grandpa coherent? Can you find some pleasure in going to visit and reading him his favorite news columns or books, or talk about when you were little?

[jobelle]

I know this is hard to remember when you hit rock bottom but you CAN take charge of your own life. It seems that you are feeling powerless and out of control. But regarding the drinks for example, you can choose not to drink everyday. Not to drink at all. Or to just drink less. I say this with good intentions, please don't give up control of your own life.

 

You can't tell beforehand if a new job will make you feel stuck. I think you should go for it for several reasons. It would give you something else to think about, it would reduce the strain on your family (if they're supporting you), it could potentially enhance your social life and you could feel overall better just having new a new goal. And the better you feel, the better equipped you are to help your family.

 

Also, remember that just being there means a lot for them.

[OneRainyDay]

Thank you all. Things are slowly picking up, I'm just still having nightmares about recent events which is hard to combat.