is she acting like this because of disinterest or does she like me?

[qwerty0987]

There's this girl, we go to the same college and met at the beginning of this summer when we both were taking summer classes there. I don't see her all that often, especially after the fall semester started. At first, when we met at the library, we sat close to each other and talked quite a bit, and this went on two more times over the next 2 weeks at the library and we seemed to get along quite well. After that, we stopped seeing each other for a while, since we don't actually share classes or anything. About 2 weeks later, I went to a guest speaker lecture (for fun) and it turned she was there too. When we took our seats but before the lecture started, I noticed that she turned her head and looked at me, twice, but didn't say hi or acknowledge me either time even though our seats were close enough. After the lecture, we lined up to get free food from the event and I saw her walking towards me then passing right by me but completely avoiding any eyecontact towards me. However, when I started eating, she walked behind me and said hi to me, and when I turned around, she was already walking away and approaching to talk to someone else. About a week or 2 later, we passed by each other on the street (in opposite directions) once, and I saw her smiling but looking down as she approached. A few days after that, we ran into each other at the intersection walking in the same direction. She said hi to me, asked how my birthday was (she knew since we are facebookfriends by now), but after we're done talking about my birthday, I try to talk to her about other stuff and all of a sudden her she turned incredibly awkward and started answering me in short one word responses. We then walked together quietly for a bit before she went inside a store and abruptly said bye to me. So all of this seems like positive signs to methat she likes me but is just shy.

 

BUT, when I approach to talk to her on facebook, she gave really short responses. First time, right before class started for the fall semester, I asked her how the week before went, since it was the week between summer session and fall semester and she went home and went on vacation. Her replies were very curt and didn't make an effort to keep the conversation going. So I thought she might be busy or something. A few days later, I decided to ask her how her semester was going, again very short reply, and then when I asked her what classes she's taking, it was marked as "seen" but she never responded.

 

I haven't ran into her once on campus since fall semester started.

 

Now, one thing I realize is that girls can act weird and awkward around guys for 2 almost polar opposite reasons. Either she is doing so because she likes you but is shy, or she knows you like her but is not interested. In her case, the facebook messages seem to imply that she's not interested. But if she was really disinterested but just trying to be polite, why would she go up behind me and say hi to me from there when I can't even see her? And I saw her smiling and looking down when we passed once,which I also know is an indicator that she might like me, though of course, it's possible she was thinking of something else.

 

I do plan on asking her out around next week since I saw on facebook that she's going to an event that I'm also going and I'll try to talk to her there.

In the meantime though, do you guys have any thoughts on this? Do you guys think that more likely than not she

A. like me

or is she

B. awwkward around me because she doesn't like me back (but probably somehow knew i like her)?

[SooSad33]

I'm not sure IF she has the same interest as you do?

I'd suggest you give it a little more time before thinking of asking her out.

 

Because if you do and she turns you down.. dont you think it'd be somewhat awkward.. friendship wise?

[qwerty0987]

I'm not sure IF she has the same interest as you do?

I'd suggest you give it a little more time before thinking of asking her out.

 

Because if you do and she turns you down.. dont you think it'd be somewhat awkward.. friendship wise?

 

I don't see her that often (in fact not AT ALL this semester so far) and this is her last semester in college. If she turns me down, then we'll go our separate ways.

[tracyis300]

If things really went the way you described it? Then you are completely clueless!

She's clearly not interested in you. You can't even have a casual conversation with this girl, and that's a clear sign of not having any interest, regardless of "if" she is shy or not.

But since you don't really bump into her, and it being the last semester? Then go for it! What do you have to lose?

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[bluelagoon]

She may be clueless. Try a direct approach: ask her out on a date (just the two of you). If she says no, she isn't interested. If she says yes, she is interested.

[qwerty0987]

She may be clueless. Try a direct approach: ask her out on a date (just the two of you). If she says no, she isn't interested. If she says yes, she is interested.

 

IDK what you mean by clueless. She acted pretty odd after the first few times we've talked, and we've seem to hit it off pretty well those first few times we met. Like not making eye contact when she walks right past me but clearly able to see me, but then saying hi to me a few minutes later when she was behind me and I couldnt see her. Or being awkward the one facetoface conversation we had out on the street. I figure from that that she couldn't just see me as "just" another friend or an acquaintance, that is something is up. Which are, most likely, the two options I listed in the title.

[bluelagoon]

Some people (including me) are pretty clueless with discerning whether a guy is interested or simply being friendly. Thus, she may be interested but playing it cool (which may come off as awkward instead) as she may not know how you feel about her.

 

I have done the walking right past someone I like plenty of times before, mainly due to either genuinely not seeing them (being too focused on whatever I was doing at the time) or being nervous. Being directly asked out has worked best IMHO whether by phone or in person.

 

Hey, qwerty0987, one last thought: has she asked whether you want to do something together? If she has, she is interested.

[Massari]

why didn't you initiate some contact? I mean she is giving you very good hints that she is interested or at least wants to get to know you. looking at you and making eye contact. You have to initiate some at the beginning once the ball gets rolling you will see her initiating hi(s) and hello(s) and longer sentences on Facebook.