BostonLife Posted March 23, 2015 Share Posted March 23, 2015 My girlfriend seems to like another guy more than she likes me. I love my girlfriend, and I have no problem with her talking to anyone she wants to talk to, be it a guy or a girl. I have some female friends myself so it'd be hypocritical and simply irrational to get upset about her doing it. There is, however, a guy who is a little different. I'm friends with him as well and we all go to the same college. (I guess what will follow is a bit of a story but it's imperative that I tell it or else you won't quite be able to understand my view point) we all met at roughly the same time and stayed together in this friendship group most of the time, now we split up but me my girlfriend and this "guy" are still close. My girlfriend always seemed to like him a bit more than me,even as a friend.she would always sit by him, talk to him more and be much more open with him (she definitely wasn't shy or anything like that towards me as she did things no shy girl would do to a guy she likes). However, we found out that we live near each other and started hanging out outside of college. (me and her) after a while we started dating and I was hoping her behaviour towards our "third" friend would change. I was wrong, nothing changed and I found it upsetting to watch, there were many situations in which I was the third wheel (every time it was just the three of us) and it got to a point I'd.start making excuses not to be with the two of them at the same time (I'd rather let them go somewhere together than stay and watch them). I suppose I should give an example to show what I mean. One day she was really miserable, I tried my best to cheer her up, dancing,running up and down the stairs, telling jokes.etc...she smiled but soon after she would turn grumpy again. In class I carried on but nothing worked.she was quiet and didn't do any work. Our lecturer split us up into groups and she was put in a group with him.before he could even utter a word she was overjoyed, smiling from ear to ear and just looked fresh.and happy.things like this happen A LOT, almost every day. I could bring up more examples like her Skyping him on valentines day and telling me.she can't talk on Facebook because she's watching a film etc. But I think I've summed up the problem (or lack thereof) i'm having. What are your thoughts? Am.I just being paranoid? Does she like him as more than a friend? Does she like him.more than.she likes me? (I spoke to her.about it but her behaviour towards him didn't change) thank you for.any input! Link to comment
mhowe Posted March 23, 2015 Share Posted March 23, 2015 Are you sure she is dating you? Because I am not sure she knows. And it would appear she does like him more than you. Link to comment
BostonLife Posted March 23, 2015 Author Share Posted March 23, 2015 Thank you for the quick reply we have been together for 5 months now... But yes we I'm pretty sure she knows, although sometimes I question that myself, it is her first relationship so the first few 'slips' i treated as lack of experience or not knowing what you shouldn't do etc. But it's getting silly now. And I can't say it doesn't hurt. Link to comment
Mari Posted March 23, 2015 Share Posted March 23, 2015 Thank you for the quick reply we have been together for 5 months now... But yes we I'm pretty sure she knows, although sometimes I question that myself, it is her first relationship so the first few 'slips' i treated as lack of experience or not knowing what you shouldn't do etc. But it's getting silly now. And I can't say it doesn't hurt. Is he available to date her? If it's only been a few months of dating her perhaps its best to let those two be together. Better that then go years dating her, marry her, and then have her realize she's not happy and perhaps should've gone for that other guy but was too young to figure it out. I'm actually aware of someone that went for that other guy that she liked like 10 years after being married and having kids, it's just ridiculous. Anyway, you're in college, is there a girl you like more? Link to comment
BostonLife Posted March 24, 2015 Author Share Posted March 24, 2015 He's single yes, there isn't another girl but even so if thats the common opinion I suppose it's better to break up with her (I don't understand why she's still with me if she doesn't like me). I don't like being treated like that and nor do I want to be a wall between them ^^ thanks Link to comment
patterned Posted March 24, 2015 Share Posted March 24, 2015 I'm not sure interpreting her actions is helpful. 'Inexperience' is an excuse you make for yourself. The question is whether or not this is working for you, whether or not this is something you want. You've answered it in your post. You're not happy with how you perceive you're being treated, regardless of interpretation, this isn't workig for you. Link to comment
Mari Posted March 24, 2015 Share Posted March 24, 2015 He's single yes, there isn't another girl but even so if thats the common opinion I suppose it's better to break up with her (I don't understand why she's still with me if she doesn't like me). I don't like being treated like that and nor do I want to be a wall between them ^^ thanks Good to see you're not clutching on to her and being controlling I hope your breakup goes in a more mature way and is less emotionally explosive. I guess the worst way it could go is both of you yelling at each other and each of you being very hurt. I hope you eventually get someone real good too after her Link to comment
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