Wat to do?

[din_83]

In case u r wondering i m 20. I have been working at this place 4 a few months now. On the first day itself i saw a girl who caught my eye "THE 1" unfortunately i didn't have the courage to approach her much earlier despite thinking of her everyday until now(still think of her).... But recently(the past week) things have been going well (praise the lord). We talk regularly at work and spend time 2gether during our breaks. Well things have got a bit tricky now. I found out from one of my close friends at work who is close to the girl i like she said that she hates guys ever since her last break up!. Well 4get that, last night we had a good chat (icq) and all but, i found out that she will be going overseas for studies at the end of the june!!! She also said that my gf would be fortunate as i am so sweet (do u think she meant anything by saying that???) wat makes things worse is that i will be going to the army in abt 10 days!!! I tried to ask her out for a movie but she sort of declined. Mayb i asked her too soon??? Well wat should i do??? Do i confess my love for her? Her birthday is also around the corner.... I can't even imagine losing her. To tell the truth i have never felt sooo strongly of a girl until now! PLS ADVISE ASAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thanks!!!

[Birdman]

Hmm, i haven't been in that situation but i would tell her how i felt. Since you both will be leaving i think you should go out for coffee or somthin, and talk with her a bit and then give her a letter that tells her how you feel. That way she can open it up when ever she wants, read it, and think about you. I know what i am about to say probably seams like crazy monkey crap but if you two are meant to be together...you will be. It may take weeks, , months, or even years, but it will happen. If she won't go out for coffee or whatever then you could always give her the letter at work.

I think why she declined you for the movie is because he dosn't want to get attached to you if she won't see you in a long time. Tha doesn't mean she doesn't care for you though.

Also, are you going into the Army or another branch? when i turn 19 (17 now) i am going to go to BT and then try to get into West Point and from there to Ranger training. So good luck with your relationship, your BT, and HAPPY BIRTHDAY

[Gilgamesh]

Ok, ill get strieght to the point.

 

Yes do tell her how you feel, this may not change the situation but you wont have regrets about not have telling her this.

 

You say she is leaving in June? will she return after summer? or is this a permanent move?

 

You need to see things from her perspective, 1) She had a painfull breakup, and may not be ready (healed enough) to get into another serious relationship yet. 2) She is going away, and so are you, if she falls for you, that seperation will cause her sadness and sorrow.

 

So my suggestion is this, dont put the pressure on her, tell her that you have fallen for her, and would like to take your relationship with her to the next level, BUT that you understand that the timing is a bit bad, and would like to continue this when she returns, and that in the mean time youll be good friends.

 

so this way, she not in a position where she has to make a yes or no decision, you told her how you really feel, but told her youll wait till shes ready. and that youll just be friends for now.

 

So now, she will not feel bad about leaving, you left a door open, and she will have all summer to think about you waiting for her.

 

good luck

[Katelyn55655]

Din...was hoping to hear from you today although I imagine you won't write again until you've seen your girl. What I wanted to say to you last night was this: only tell her your feelings if you are sure you aren't married to an outcome. When there is freedom for you to speak and for her to listen she won't feel threatened. By the way, going away physically doesn't get people out of our minds. So, since you won't forget about her for a long time, maybe never, don't stress over the leaving part. Also, I wouldn't suggest telling her how you feel unless you are certain you won't come accross as clingy, needy, or insecure. These are feelings that are hard to hide and when other people sense them they generally want to run away. SO, pay attention to your feelings and what's going on inside. If while talking to her you suddenly feel like you are going into emotional overload (heart beating madly, palms sweating, hard to breath, etc.) back off...say something like..."Oh, I've got work to do. Let's talk later!" and try talking again later. Good luck and I just wanted to let you know I've been thinking about you and your predicament.