what would your reply be?

[ftkdancer]

I am a female, that lives with my bf. One of my favorite bands, is coming to the city i live in. I ask my bf, one morning, can we go? He says sure! Later that day, my daughter texts, to tell me that band is coming. I say to my bf, " hmmmm its my daughter, telling me that band is coming, maybe they wanna go!"

 

Please let me know how you would respond to my comment.

Thank you in advance!

[annie24]

why don't all of you go together?

[1a1a]

Yeah, all go

[ftkdancer]

Thx for your replies. The reply i got was....so you want to go with a bunch of others, and i can go if i want, then. I could not believe that he would even think that! So i just said, the more the merrier. Am i incorrect in saying that he took that way out of context, and decided what it meant, on his own?

[Scoe141]

Did he say it or text it? Texting can be misconstrued. I'd ask for clarification before jumping to conclusions. Then after you discuss it, if it still makes you feel uneasy let us know and we can try and help you out.

 

Good luck.

[ftkdancer]

He said it, in person. And, let me tell you, it has gone from there, to " You( meaning me) could have fixed it, by saying it is only us going, when i said i thought it was just us going". ( which he did not say). And then proceeded to wave me off, like i had done something wrong. ( which i dont feel i did). Then it turned into that he doesnt even know me, and that i am someone different, from the day before, and just stop pretending that i care.

I dont think that i said or did anything wrong. Nor do i think that i should apologize.

[Mischa234]

Sounds like he's just having a moment. Lay low for a couple days and it'll sort itself out once he's had time to think. He probably feels awkward that your daughter might be there but he should really get over it...

[SpottiOtti]

Does he usually get insecure about time you spend with your daughter? Do they get along? His reaction seems like it's rooted in some sort of "I want her all to myself and resent the time her daughter takes away from me" reaction.

[ftkdancer]

Yes, they get al

[ftkdancer]

Yes they get along fine. The issue isnt the concert, or whi is/isnt going, the issue is that, once again, he has taken something that i said, and made it meansomething totally different. And then gets very angry why i would say something like that, no matter how many times i say, no!

[DancingFool]

Your comment can read as you asking him to go and then ditching him for your daughter and whoever "they" are. I can see why he would be upset. You are not even very clear in your posts here in terms of what you are getting at and what advice you are seeking. I had to read your post a few times to figure out what you are after exactly.

 

In short, yes, your communication skills are poor and something you should work on.

[ftkdancer]

Thx for your reply. What i was getting at, was to know how everyone would have reacted to what i said about the concert. I didnt say that i wanted them to come, nor did i state that i changed my mind, that i wanted to go with him. Only wondering if they wanted to go. Maybe it is me, that needs to think before i speak! Or maybe its him that needs to stop reading into things i say, and assuming they mean something else, without asking. Your right dancingfool, i will work on my communication skills, for sure