Rude ?

[Lito]

Could it be that you're p.off about this mostly because you *didn't* say anything at the time, and you now regret it?..

[tadpole3]

Could it be that you're p.off about this mostly because you *didn't* say anything at the time, and you now regret it?..

 

Possible but I don't think so. Like I said, there was no civil way of saying anything due to the circumstances. I originally posed the question to this forum, because I do know myself to sometimes be overly sensitive to some things...

[Batya33]

I'm not sure what you would have said but you could have just told him nicely "I have to go now", and left and explained why later.

[SoulTaker]

The more I read responses about the venue, and who's responsibility it was; I feel more strongly that it was just plain rude. Because it made me think, what if we were at a nice quiet place, and a co-worker of his came over and just started whispering to him? Same difference. Or if a co-worker of mine came over to me, and started whispering, and I just allowed it to keep happening. I would have been guilty. Remember, this didn't happen just once, but several times. Now maybe if it had been quieter, I might have said something like, "Excuse me, you do know we are on a date" in a normal decibel, because screaming it (like it would've been necessary) would've seemed possessive.

 

I agree. There are two issues. The first is the venue, which I've already discussed. One thing that comes accross is the laziness or ineptitude of the man for accepting his friend's invite for a first date. He treated the first date as a hangout situation which is unacceptable.

 

The second issue is what happened at the venue, which you've noted is rude, and a definite red flag. It's like a person who answers their cell phone on the date, and talks at length without any regard to the person they're with. If anyone does that to me, then there wouldn't be a second date (personality flaw).

 

In your case, there should have been a deep apology coming from the guy (friend, or no friend). Maybe i missed it, but I didn't see anything mentioning a sincere apology in your updates, which is troubling.

[Sportster2005]

Rude at worse, lacking in social graces at best.

[IAmFCA]

It is different than your whispering example, because whispering indicates a choice to exclude. In this case, the venue was loud, and conversation difficult, and it was just more than anyone had the ability to overcome.

 

Rude, unfortunate, but nothing I would take personally. More, a poor choice and then an ill-fated attempt to manage through it.