I just don't know

[Happybtconfuse]

So I have one son from a previous relationship n my bf has 2 sons from a previous relationship, plus we have 2 together. Now my problem is I got invited to my cousins sons bday party her son n my son are only a week apart (we spent out pregancies together ) but she only has enough room n money to invite just my son. My bf says I can't go if she's only inviting my son. I'm torn, it's kind of not fair that my son gets to go to a bday party n not my step sons. Also had a situation where my bf thought that my dad only bought my kids Xmas gifts. But then again my step sons go see their mom n get gifts n stuff, I don't expect their mom to buy my kids stuff I don't expect my son to go to a party if her boys get to go. How do ppl work thru blended family situations ? It's like my bf doesn't like my family or doesn't refer to them as inlaws , I live where's bf from, I made friends with his family , his sister is basically my sister, but my family isn't worth his time idk it hurts , he wants to get married in the next few years I hope he'll start acting like my family is his family too

[shaynah]

I think that a lot of people don't know how to handle blended families and it can get very complicated. Obviously the best thing would be to include everyone and don't play favoritism with any one. However, that's easier said then done, even just based on resources alone. Some peoples feelings are going to get hurt, it's almost inevitable. I think these situations get better with time. Once people form bonds with the other children etc, right now it's all new to everyone involved. If you get married your family will be your boyfriends family whether he likes it or not. It may be one of these things that take time, relationships need to grow, and evolve. Hopefully he will put in an effort though, and perhaps telling him how important it is for you to know that he will if you were to marry eventually would be a good plan.

[rosephase]

How old is your son who was invited? Kids don't have to do everything together blended families or not. So parties are for kids of one age and others are for kids of another age. I think your boyfriend is being unreasonable. Your kids are going to have separate social lives more and more as they get older. You have 5 boys between the two of you that seems like hard enough work without making it harder. If your boyfriend doesn't want the other boys to feel left out then why doesn't he take them to do something fun? It's going to be pretty normal that someone inviting one of your boys to something isn't going to be inviting all five of them.