Still Can't Heal - Counseling with ex????

[MrMikeWikowski]

I am at such a loss.

 

I just can't keep my ex out of my head. It has been a very difficult last year and a half. She cheated on me. She got back together with me and broke up with me several times. In Feb she found someone else. And even though we had been broken up for 6 months, that is when she finally said it is over. I had been replaced.

 

I did NC for months. I got a lot better. It was still hard, but better. However, just weeks ago I went for coffee with her. Now I am back nearly at sqare one. I miss her so much. Even though I know she has moved on and is living with her new boyfriend, I still wish she was back in my life. I miss her. She asked if we could be friends. I told her no.

 

I just can't seem to move on. I am so confused as to why she contacted me again. It sounded like she really wanted to see me.

 

I am wondering if it might be a good idea to see if she would want to go to counseling with me. If she really wants to be my friend.... I don't know. I just need peace. I have looked everywhere for it, and maybe I need some help to find it. I just want to be at peace with her. Not to be longing for somthing I can't have. Anyone have experience with this? Anyone think it is a good idea. Terrible idea? I don't think she will even go for it, but I was wondering if I should ask.

 

I have been strong lately. Besides an email asking if she was thinking about me, I haven't contacted her and told her how bad I have been feeling.

 

comments welcome

 

Thanks

[bleeder]

Hi MrMike,

 

I do empathize with your situation. Remember that in times of breakups, it's the getting over part which is the hardest.

 

I do not advice you to opt for counselling with her, for I am sure that she would be remotely interested in that. Focus on yourself for now. Spend more time with your friends or family, and occupy your hours to the fullest. As much as we might love someone, it is senseless to pursue a one sided love affair.

 

I wish you a speedy recovery.

[HCI]

Why go to counseling with her? Go yourself if you want but why with her? When you got together for coffee, what did you talk about? How did you present yourself?

[Clarabelle]

I don't recommend you go into counseling with her, because it will open up a lot of your wounds in front of her, and that is not going to be good for you.

[JohnnyTable]

Go to counseling for yourself. It really does help.