PLEASE HELP.....NEED ADVICE

[juz4storm]

I'm thinking about getting involved with a man that has been divorced twice and has custody of 3 children from his 2 ex wives. Now I have a child and I don't care that he has children. He says the first marriage was because he was too young. The second marriage his wife left him and the children. Now it's hard for me to believe that he has custody all of the children from 2 wives. Is there any logical reason why his second wife just got up and left? Can he be abusive? Thanks in advance.

[RayKay]

If his second wife left because of abuse, I find it hard to imagine the child was left with him.

 

I think it is very believable she up and left...reading the posts around here, it is pretty common for women OR men to have these sudden changes of heart

[Mun]

Hi there,

I think you should go slow with him and get to know him--this way you will find out for yourself what kind of man he is.

 

More men are getting custody of the children these days. It's not unusual anymore to find single dads who are devoted to their children.

 

For now I would say: believe him and keep your eyes open.

[avman]

Why would it be hard to believe he has custody? Being a good father shouldn't be seen as a negative.

[juz4storm]

Thanks for the advise. I'm just worried because he seems like a nice guy but you never know. Now is it possible for a man to find 2 women who don't want their children in his life time? I'm the type of person that analyzes a lot and I admit that I thought maybe he's abusive, the ex was just too scared and the reason why she left the kids was because he's great with them. Or maybe he's a lazy person and the wife just got fed up with it. What I'm looking for are opinions, from men and women, to why he has all 3 children from 2 ex's. If you have any ideas please tell me? I'm the type of person that will accept the good and the bad.

[juz4storm]

Also, is it common to be married to someone for 6 years, have 2 children and just get up and leave? To me it sounds strange. Anyone else?

[RayKay]

Also, is it common to be married to someone for 6 years, have 2 children and just get up and leave? To me it sounds strange. Anyone else?

 

Yes. Read around the forums. People do just up and leave, for sometimes very minor reasons. Even my own father left my mother after being married for 7 years, 2 children, and one 2 months away from being born. Why? He decided he was not ready for commitment.

 

Of course, he re-married a year later and had another child

[Mun]

I know a man whose wife left him and their 2 children after being married for about 6 years.. so yes it does happen that a wife will up and leave. He has custody and he's a great father.