LOSING YOUR VIRGINITY ? A BIG THING OR NOT ?

[Chelseablue]

Is losing your virginity a big thing for a girl ?

 

I know a girl who says that she really, really would like to sleep with me (we go out clubbing etc.) but she's really nervous and says that she doesn't think she's ready. She says that sometimes she wants to but more often than not doesn't want to because she isnt "up for it". Personally as an 18 year old I'm up for it 95% of the time, it's probably my hormones !

 

Is losing it a big thing ? because personally I don't think it is, your opinions please

[Chelseablue]

1 thing I forgot to mention - she's a virgin, I'm not and she's 17.

 

 

Cheers

[San123]

to me it was a very big thing... I think it probably varies with girl to girl though. I think it definantly makes you feel more "attatched" to the guy, but that could just be me!

[Chelseablue]

I think the main problem with her is that everybody at school knows she is a virgin and there seems to be pressure on her to lose it, she is very shy.

[mymelancholysoul]

Losing your virginity is HUGE! No girl wants to regret her first. I mean, lets face it we only get so many firsts in our lifetime. Sex needs to happen for all the right reasons and if she has any doubt, then I suggest waiting. I was 14 when I lost mine and I wish I could reverse time to un do what I did. Just give her some time and explain that you will wait because you want it to be right for her. Make this girl feel comfortable in knowing she doesn't need to compete or be pressured into having sex. She needs to make the decision for herself and with the right person, whether you are that person or not.

[Sexychiick16]

ITS A REALLY BIG DEAL....According to the bible ur not supose to have sex until marrige and stable...I havnt yet but latley ive been wanting to im pretty much a rebelling christian tho...

 

I hope u decide its way to special and u should wait until u knwo the guys going to be there through thick n thin...No matter what! make sure he cares a great deal about u and u care a great deal about him.. Take care sweets!

[kate111]

it isn't compared to world famine.

 

Personally I don't think sex gets very good for a girl until you have at least some experience.

 

If you have sex with her she will probably get attached to you. Be ready for that.

[shes2smart]

It wasn't a big deal for me (I was 16 at the time)....I viewed it more as something that was going to have to be done sooner or later. It didn't take place in the context of a relationship. The only regret I had about it was that my parents found out and just embarrassed me to hell and back and made a much bigger deal out of it than it was.

 

I learned my lesson after that and kept my journals in a padlocked metal box until I moved out of their house. I felt more "violated" by that intrusion than losing my viriginity.

[Mix Maxster]

Ok this is a bit of a touchy subject for girls. Honestly sex is a part of life, we wouldn't be here if PEOPLE DIDN'T HAVE SEX!!! Seriously how do you think kids are born, God??? and it REALLY IRKS me that society labels sex as some kind of crap we shouldn't be doing. I understand the whole unwanted pregnancies, but BE SMART ABOUT IT!!! It's societies fault for making a big issue about everything and don't you notice how it's the girls who have troubles because THEY KNOW IF THEY SLEEP WITH SOMEONE everyone will call her a s*** where as when a guy does it they'll be like "yo dawg!! Man you're one of us now, off the hook"

 

I mean you get the idea. I don't think losing ones virginity is a big deal because what does it symbolize? That they're a part of you? You're sharing some kind of mystical bond??? Things happen, couples break up and sex should not be the thing to keep them together because it's sacred or something. Listen, I blame all the stupid parents and politicians out there who make sex sound like it's such a horrible thing and yet none of those freaking idiots would be here if their parents didn't do it. Really it's time to grow up a little and NOT LABEL girls as some kind of s*** and then label the guy as some kind of male hero.

[shes2smart]

Listen, I blame all the stupid parents and politicians out there who make sex sound like it's such a horrible thing and yet none of those freaking idiots would be here if their parents didn't do it. Really it's time to grow up a little and NOT LABEL girls as some kind of s*** and then label the guy as some kind of male hero.

 

This double standard has been around since the beginning of time. Much as each generation would like to think it will change, it doesn't. It was going on long before you were born, long before I was born and I suspect it will still be around long after we both are gone, no matter how unfair and wrong it may be.

[kate111]

luckily my country is quite liberal.

 

we can do what we like

[Goddess4ever]

I think one of the biggest problems that we have right now in "society", is that we completely advertise and demonstrate sex everywhere, but no one is TALKING about it realisticly. I have seen so many girls in high school that make a big deal about their "first time"....but when it is over and done with, they sleep with everything. Not that their is a huge problem with that...but they make such a big deal out of the first time, and not the 12th or 22 time they have done it. Maybe every partner that someone has should be "special" in their own way. My first time was 16...and it was kinda a "one night stand". My first "real" boyfriend was at the same age...we dated for 4 months....but he dumped me when he found out that I was a virgin....because he thought I would get all "clingy". So when I went on vacation a few months after the break up...I met someone and we slept together....I didn't tell him that I was a virgin until much later.

 

Point being...I chose to have sex for the first time that way because I didn't want to have sex with a person that I loved, to have them dump me after it was done (which I am sure would have happened with THAT boyfriend in high school)...so I did it with someone who wasn't. We were both honest with each other about what we wanted, so it wasn't a problem. I must say as well that we did keep in touch years after, even though he lived in another country....and I did go to visit him once. I don't regret it at all. That was what I chose at the time. And not to knock anyone's personal choice about when they choose to have sex, but I feel that it should be when someone is emotionally ready for it, and my personal opinion is those who wait for the perfect person may be setting themselves up for disappointment. That of course doesn't mean to run out and sleep with anything.

[Shinobie]

Wow dude if u r up to sex 95 percent of the time u really think with ur small head a lot.Control ur gosh damn hormones and learn to respect girls not everythign is sex.Id love to be in ur position with having women who like me because i would use it in such a better way that ur using it it sounds like.Using it to pleasure ur small head and ur hormones which is totally retarded it is so much more mang.I mean some of u people who have gf's all the time and get way more girl interaction then us.Are actually arogant to the true meaning of love and women then u when ur around them all the time come on!It sounds like ur pushing sex on this chick in the way ur talking and that is just not respectful u gotta learn how to respect women.

[Chelseablue]

To Shinobie I'm not pushing anything onto her, I've been waiting for 3 months for her - granted you do have a point about thinking with my small head. She isnt my GF she's a good m8 who told me that she wanted a "sex buddy" and I offered and she said "yes". She's the same as me she doesnt want to be in a relationship and have sex as we both like being single.

 

To Goddess4ever I think your ex BF who dumped you because you were a virgin was a complete fool, you could have experimented together and become closer.

 

I think she's building sex up on a pedistal to make it something it isnt and will be disappointed after her first time, I'm just saying that I think its less of a big deal than she's making it out to be. I dont want to b her first time I want to just add her to my list, as I already have a GF 8) !

[tobereleased]

She isnt my GF she's a good m8 who told me that she wanted a "sex buddy" and I offered and she said "yes". She's the same as me she doesnt want to be in a relationship and have sex as we both like being single.

 

Hmm.. anyone else see that seinfeld episode? where jerry and elaine tried to have sex and just stay as friends?

 

 

Good episode.

 

Well Chelseablue, good luck with just being "sex buddies".

 

I kind of wish that i could have one of those, heh.

[1899]

She isnt my GF she's a

 

Hmm.. anyone else see that seinfeld episode? where jerry and elaine tried to have sex and just stay as friends?

 

 

Good episode.

 

Well Chelseablue, good luck with just being "sex buddies".

 

I kind of wish that i could have one of those, heh.

 

 

The world is going to turn into a big AIDS germ.

[Shinobie]

I dont believe in that whole "sex buddies" nonsense it takes all the meaning out of it and degrades it.

[Prezkot]

In a way it very much does... as attested by Jerry & Elaine... but I can see where certain people would like to have those liberties...