1899
-
Posts
222 -
Joined
Content Type
Profiles
Forums
Articles
Videos
Blogs
Store
Everything posted by 1899
-
I hope all women arent like this, if they are, im SCREWED!
-
I think thats a girl thought. Most guys dont like the idea of a guy in the picture. It is seen as someone in the way of their target. But, girls seem to get more competitive when they see a guy with someone. And Ive seen that with my own eyes.
-
The idea behind avoiding the friend zone is to keep your feelings from being trampled on, or used. If a girl dosent like you "like that" and you allow yourself to become her friend, doing favors, escorting in groups to places, buying gifts, flirting etc. when deep down inside you want more, well, you most likely are allowing yourself to be led on when doing these friendly activities. And if/when you see this woman(or whoever is doing the friendzoning) with someone else, you will have bad feelings. Not good. Thats why many here advise moving on to someone who reciprocates your feelings. I beleve in being clear about what you want up front. You have needs. They either want you or they dont. Its not allowing yourself to be drug around by your balls. Problem is, i believe most women are very rarely turned on by looks, but by personality so...... On the other hand, by looking at the women that have posted here, there may be some potential in being a womans friend in that she may look at you differently one day, but you have to be strong to put up with the emotional ups and dows of seeing her with someone else or being constantly rejected.
-
Yes, hes talking to you right now, and everything seems back to normal. Right now he: 1.probably feels like hes trapped in just having to make contact with you everyday or else you will freak, or hear about it through his friends. Somehow (and i know this may be hard but) you should find somthing interesting to do outside of just him. Besides, what happens if he dumps you? Seems like you would be pretty darn upset. Find youself somthing else interesting to do while you still have your sanity! 2.dosent want to be exclusive. Yeah he likes you but not being exclusive is buying him time to meet others. Us guys sometimes get curious about what else is out there when we see the great sucess we are having with just one person. (read: new confidence) Looks like from what you posted he's having his cake and eating it too. Why be exclusive when you can get everything without making a commitment? Face it, your not married to him. Try to slow the gifts/favors/initiations down IF you want this to work. Thats what I read out of it
-
The funny thing is, at the restaruant, when everybody told thier age, I was the oldest and everyone else was like 19 or 20 including herself. When I told my age she said "oh i thought you were the youngest guy here."
-
Do you believe in letting a woman get to know you a little at a time or telling alot about yourself when you ask her out. I think when most women see me, they blow me off because I look younger than I really am, and they think im just another nobody. But the question is, do you tell them up front about yourself, (basically bragging) or do you think, "hey if she dosent want to get to know me, thats her loss". Ive seen situations where people tell me that after they came to my house and found out what my hobbies were and what I do for a living they thought of me differently. But by this time they have moved on after rejecting me and we were just friends. I ask because I met this girl at a restuarant and she dosent know me that well, she was sitting with us in a group setting, we exchanged numbers and I know shes single. I called her 2 days later and asked her out, nothing extravagant, told her I think shes a nice person, would like to get to know her more, blah blah blah She said she didnt have any plans this weekend. She said to let her think about it and she would call me back. Imean, what is there to think about?
-
Yea, same here!
-
You know what? Maybe you should start being proactive and approach men that may not have the confidence to approach you. Some of those guys may like you for who you are and respect you and your boundaries. Dont sit around waiting for the right or wrong guy. Steer things your way. I agree with other posts stating to explain your boundaries up front, such as only being intimate with your future husband, however you would word that. That will get rid of the players real quick!
-
You are right, some guys like that, but some guys like me dont like that game. Dont assume every guy is like that. I dont know if it has to do with confidence but if you did that with me id assume you were not interested and leave you alone. Of course you wouldint care because it means less work for you to let the guy do all the work, right?
-
I have asked her out on 3 occasions, but that was before she broke up. She got dumped about a month ago. I would not ask her out to go to the lake with me if I didnt really like her. She should see that. I know 3 other girls that I could do that to, but i dont want to lead them on. Id rather go by myself than do that. She is polite, but there is no reason to be shy, she knows all about me, shes been to my house with a bunch of friends and I asked her out to a graduation party after she got dumped. Maybe she is not ready for anything right now. I dont know why my friend would talk about her to me if shes not ready. When our friend called to tell me she broke up,The friend is like "I just wanted to let you know that she dosent mind you knowing that shes single but she wants no commitments. she does ask about you etc.. " I then said i was kinda over her after I saw her with her boyfriend when we all went bowling. he said, you should give it a chance,You should just talk to her as a friend. I said ok. My point is she dosent initaite anything. I feel it is a waste of time even telling me that if shes not going to tell me (or show me) shes interested.
-
Im a guy and I think she shouldnt reply. Dont allow your emotions to be played with. He knows what he did wrong. Let him figure it out if he dosent. Hes acting like he did nothing wrong.
-
It started out me asking this girl out 3 times before, and all i got was "im seeing somone". Ok, i can handle that. but now that she got dumped by her boyfriend, our mutual friend calls me and tells me everything about it and that she is single and that she asked if I knew she was single. instead of telling me. The friend had to almost force her to give me her phone number, but i ended up asking for it by the time she gave it to me.I say Joyriding because theres she will go out with me, but only in a group, like her 2 sisters, and 2 other people. And when we go out, she dosent have much to say to me. And I hear about her asking about me through a friend. So I asked her to go to the lake with me once, she did do that, with like 4 other people in the the car. But When I asked (thru text) her to go to a graduation party where everyone knew us, I get a response of "im coming with my family and i think we are going to be late" I was like What?? She calls me back 2 days later with some lame excuse and says she will go, but that was after i had made plans to go somewhere else. So Ive initiated several times, shes been jetskiing with me 2 times, (with friends), came to my house to watch movies 3 times (with friends), yet never calls me and initiates anything. In fact the only time she will initiate is when we see each other at Church on sunday, and its just "hi, hows things going? do you like six flags? Me and my girlfriend are going, but we dont know exactly when" But notice she will never ask me to go with her. Now this weekend im going to the lake all day, and I just dont want her coming along for the ride with the rest of our mutual friends if she dosent want to initiate anything with me. Whats the point of 1 on 1 dating if you get the benifits of being just friends? As I write this, she calls me and asks me for directions to the nearest skating rink thats open at 9:33PM with her cousin and friends from where she currently is on the road and didnt ask me if I wanted to join her?? What am i to think? What am i going to say this weekend if she asks thru another friend to come along? Who knows maybe she wont.
-
Man, rutgerhauer im 22 yrs old and I could have wrote that post myself! Just this weekend I stopped by a friends house by myself for thier BBQ gathering and everyone thought I was someones son that was there and this lady (about 40) asked for my age and said she thought I was 16! No wonder I dont have a gf! The only reason Id like a girlfriend is just to go places with, like restaurants, malls, etc. My family thinks I should go to the gym, but im already in shape! I can do about 15 pullups, 25 pushups in 2 minutes. (training for police) Im just really slim, 140Lbs. Ive got almost 100 Hrs of vacation time, but I know if I leave I would not want to come back to this boring town/job. Im still checking the HR sections in other areas of the country, because if I could move, I would! My life is very boring and repetitious.
-
It was hard for me at first also. The BEST thing you can do is not just fill out an application, but ask to speak with a manager. Talk to the manager/owner, show intrest, ask him questions about the job, details, pay, etc.. Speak as though your shopping for a job and that your labor is very valuble. Dont come off as desparate. Sometimes employers will see that your not just another teen looking for a job. Some will ask for your name and phone number or tell you to give the app to them personally. Employers are looking for motivated people with a personality they can get along with. Show them that you are motivated to help thier company. You would not believe how many times ive been offered a job by just showing intrest in the work at hand, instead of saying "got a job application?" Oh and when you get the job, stay for atleast a year, that looks good to future employers.
-
So guys DO like it when you make the first move, eh?
1899 replied to Twilight777's topic in Dating Advice
Twilight777 Let me just say this: Guys that make the first move and go through what you just went though all the time. Its called rejection. But life goes on and they have to keep trying. I guess what Im trying to say is, dont assume just because your a girl that made the first move and it didnt work out that it wasent a good idea. Hes just a fish that didnt take the bait. Theres more fish out there. Put your bait back in the water and stop thinking about it. And as you can see on here, alot of men like it. -
To make a long story short, I know these 4 girls that are all from one family and we know each other from church. I know ive been friendzoned/rejected for various reasons from them. Well, I usually get invited out to hang out with them on the weekends from a guy who is like in his mid 40's (hes got kids in thier mid teens) and at first it was cool, seriously these girls all look like somthing off a music video, 17-22 yrs old. but now I feel like Im being teased, one has a boyfriend, one has 2 kids, one is like 5 yrs younger than me(im 22), and one flat out rejected me. He says "hey lets go to....." They hop in my car (cuz my car can carry all of them, and the girls dont have one) we go places and we do things as a group, but i get no 1 on 1 action. I kinda feel like im being used, but i know its just for fun and relaxation. I dont know what to do. I feel like if I talk about it to the guy who gets us together, I think he will say "well you gatta be outgoing and just hang out" Which is true, BUT, it goes no further than that. I dont want to hang out with girls that rejected me. Its getting old. Perfect Example: This weekend Im going jetskiing. Now the guy and his son came with me last time and really enjoyed it. Now they are talking about getting the girls to come along next time. I didnt invite the girls, except the one that rejected me (she never said she was interested, she just smiled, i told her to get back in touch with me before she left for the afternoon, but she didnt). BUT the guy offered to help with gas.. Whats your thoughts?
-
I think people like you and me need a wingman..someone you trust that can help you with your shyness and encourage you to start conversations with women you see out on the town, because you know nothing wont happen waiting for the ladies. When I think of approaching a woman, all these negative feelings about myself pop up and I feel better just being in my comfort zone. Sometimes i just need some encouraging words from another male friend to help me make a move. Sometimes they say "look, you have a good job, your own place, your own transportation, whats the problem?? There she is, say somthing!"
-
Hmm, didnt think about it like that.
-
Annie24 does sound right. Personally, i keep just enough distance to keep my feelings from being hurt, I just playfully flirt, I see this girl every Sunday anyway.....Do what you think is best.
-
I think it depends on how strong she is. It may end up in tears for her, but it may not. I say atleast be nice to him. I would not force him to make up his mind either. It would suck though if he suddenly announced he was engaged....
-
The problem here is that you are scared you are going to get hurt. What if, after some time hanging out with you he likes YOU more? Then he cuts it off with his girlfirend? You could be the winner or the looser here. But you cant be afraid to find out. They arent engaged are they? Also remember that you could be in his girlfriends position down the road, him looking at other women. If i were you Id keep talking to him casually. You must not let your imagination run wild. Dont get your hopes up. It may lead nowhere. Im kind of in the same situation you are in with a girl. I take every opportunity to talk to her. Shes stuck on this one guy, but shes still nice to me, so i think of her as just a friend until further notice. The way i see it is, the bid has been placed, but the auction is not over!
-
Let us know how it goes, I had a situation like that, and turned the girl down. I figured she was playing me since she rejected me twice.
-
Best thread ive read on this site, clears up some misconceptions.
-
stark future for the single male posters in this forum?
1899 replied to dlplight99999's topic in Dating Advice
Man, I went there, that stuff is pretty good, These guys are serious. They use acronynms, and they even have a "troubleshooting" section when you get in a bind. Time to do some reading, I may actually get some structure in my dating life. Its kinda like learning HTML. There are rules. -
stark future for the single male posters in this forum?
1899 replied to dlplight99999's topic in Dating Advice
I certainly cannot agree more. Im one of those who was not allowed to date before college. And I think thats what put me behind socially, but I think at this point all I can do is work on my personality and be more open and laid back around attractive women, let them see my fun side. Not take myself or my position in life so seriously. My assignment is to start joking with women or "teasing" them in order to make them feel like I dont put them on a pedistal, get rid of that OMG im gonna mess up feeling. If anything its a way to break the ice and open them up to conversation.