feellikeafool Posted September 25, 2011 Share Posted September 25, 2011 so i have known this is going to come but i never expected it to be like this. there are so many emotions involved, i'm so up and down, i love him, i hate him, i want to see him, i never want to see him, i cry every 5mins, get angry at myself for crying, get angry at him, i want to scream in his face, want him to explain his behavior, ask all the whys to make me understand, i want to beg him for another chance but i dont want to be in a relationship with him! so the pain begins today and i just want it to stop Link to comment
Bethanyy Posted September 25, 2011 Share Posted September 25, 2011 Sounds like your really confused and regardless of what happens with him you need some time to think and decide what it is that you want Link to comment
northpickle Posted September 25, 2011 Share Posted September 25, 2011 Awwww feel I'm thinking of you, it's still so early on for you, I remember well those early days, I was absolutely sick to death of him being in my head. He still is now! Don't feel bad about any emotion you're feeling. Just let it out and try your very hardest to look after yourself. Link to comment
Airbag Posted September 25, 2011 Share Posted September 25, 2011 so i have known this is going to come but i never expected it to be like this. there are so many emotions involved, i'm so up and down, i love him, i hate him, i want to see him, i never want to see him, i cry every 5mins, get angry at myself for crying, get angry at him, i want to scream in his face, want him to explain his behavior, ask all the whys to make me understand, i want to beg him for another chance but i dont want to be in a relationship with him! so the pain begins today and i just want it to stop I know exactly how you feel It feels like a manic depression. Best thing to do is give it time, and if you really need help, please go see a psychiatrist, like I did. Plus I'm on medicines to help me survive through the days. Then again, I was already diagnosed with depression since I was 15, so "depression + heartbreak = insanity". Link to comment
loulou37 Posted September 25, 2011 Share Posted September 25, 2011 aww honey i know how you're feeling, it's the same for me.....i feel all the same that you're going through right now, i think we all are... i nearly contacted my ex last night and i am so glad i never now. try to focus on other stuff, you've been doing great so far x Link to comment
digdug Posted September 25, 2011 Share Posted September 25, 2011 Today, I wish I had something for the pain to go away for you, but I am in a funk too. I'm trying like crazy to get out of it, but until I hear when she's coming, or if she's coming over, I am still so uptight. I think it's more that I just want this to get this over with, as I know it's needed. Hang in there feel, we knew we had days like today, and you just have to ride it out. Keep pumping yourself by saying "I can do this!" I've done it a few times this morning, and although brief, it helps. Even made me laugh one time thinking, if someone next door hears me they'll think I've lost it ... and, for today, perhaps I have. Stay strong today, and take comfort from knowing you're not alone. We all got your back. Link to comment
BlueAngle Posted September 25, 2011 Share Posted September 25, 2011 Yah I understand of the back and forth feeling. It's like you don't want him but you do and you will want to run and hug him if you see him. But when you run to him, you will halt right in front of him and all the bad memories of the breakup will come back. Then you will look at him and take a while to contemplate whether I really want to hug and be with this man or not. That means you have to forgive him for everything that he has done. But again how can you? He hurt you too much. How can you lower yourself for this piece of sh...t? You can do better. Link to comment
feellikeafool Posted September 25, 2011 Author Share Posted September 25, 2011 Sounds like your really confused and regardless of what happens with him you need some time to think and decide what it is that you want no im not confused just an emotional wreck, i know exactly what i want and it definitely is not a relationship with him again, we were no good for each other Link to comment
feellikeafool Posted September 25, 2011 Author Share Posted September 25, 2011 Awwww feel I'm thinking of you, it's still so early on for you, I remember well those early days, I was absolutely sick to death of him being in my head. He still is now! Don't feel bad about any emotion you're feeling. Just let it out and try your very hardest to look after yourself. hey north, how you feeling today? its been a bit of a rollercoaster day for me, just been trying to keep myself busy, works in small doses before you find yourself back to square one i know it will take time, wish there was some way we could fast forward through all this lol Link to comment
feellikeafool Posted September 25, 2011 Author Share Posted September 25, 2011 aww honey i know how you're feeling, it's the same for me.....i feel all the same that you're going through right now, i think we all are... i nearly contacted my ex last night and i am so glad i never now. try to focus on other stuff, you've been doing great so far x hey lou, i feel terrible i still have not read your thread thanks for your kind words and support, well done for resisting the urges, thats a big achievement Link to comment
feellikeafool Posted September 25, 2011 Author Share Posted September 25, 2011 Today, I wish I had something for the pain to go away for you, but I am in a funk too. I'm trying like crazy to get out of it, but until I hear when she's coming, or if she's coming over, I am still so uptight. I think it's more that I just want this to get this over with, as I know it's needed. Hang in there feel, we knew we had days like today, and you just have to ride it out. Keep pumping yourself by saying "I can do this!" I've done it a few times this morning, and although brief, it helps. Even made me laugh one time thinking, if someone next door hears me they'll think I've lost it ... and, for today, perhaps I have. Stay strong today, and take comfort from knowing you're not alone. We all got your back. hey dig, sorry your going through a tough time, hopefully once its all over you will have a more positive outlook has she contacted you about meeting yet? I CAN DO THIS!!! Link to comment
feellikeafool Posted September 25, 2011 Author Share Posted September 25, 2011 Yah I understand of the back and forth feeling. It's like you don't want him but you do and you will want to run and hug him if you see him. But when you run to him, you will halt right in front of him and all the bad memories of the breakup will come back. Then you will look at him and take a while to contemplate whether I really want to hug and be with this man or not. That means you have to forgive him for everything that he has done. But again how can you? He hurt you too much. How can you lower yourself for this piece of sh...t? You can do better. hey blue, you hit the nail on the head i think, i already know there is no future, not for now anyway, i want to heal and grow from this and then see wat i feel, i'm still emotionally connected to him, so many feelings still there but the pain of the break up and bad memories are also still there Link to comment
digdug Posted September 25, 2011 Share Posted September 25, 2011 hey dig, sorry your going through a tough time, hopefully once its all over you will have a more positive outlook has she contacted you about meeting yet? I CAN DO THIS!!! Yes, she contacted me. I started a thread. It went as good as it could go for now. How are you? How is your day going? I think about you and wonder how you're doing when you aren't on here. I hope you're doing well. Keep grinding, you so deserve it!! Link to comment
northpickle Posted September 25, 2011 Share Posted September 25, 2011 hey north, how you feeling today? its been a bit of a rollercoaster day for me, just been trying to keep myself busy, works in small doses before you find yourself back to square one i know it will take time, wish there was some way we could fast forward through all this lol Yo! I'm feeling the best I have felt for a long time today. Maybe it's because I know I haven't quite lost him, there is a chance of recon but we both need time, space and to work on things. I'm not going to contact him, I'll wait at least a week (we kind of agreed to check in on each other about once a week, but no hard set rules, just whenever we both wanted to but nothing too heavy). I am making plans to carry on with my life, and where I'm going to go next. I just so want him by my side! But I have to do this alone, get myself back together without him. I agree, a fast forward button would be so handy, haha! But we're getting there one day at a time. Look after yourself Link to comment
feellikeafool Posted September 25, 2011 Author Share Posted September 25, 2011 Yes, she contacted me. I started a thread. It went as good as it could go for now. How are you? How is your day going? I think about you and wonder how you're doing when you aren't on here. I hope you're doing well. Keep grinding, you so deserve it!! hey dig, means a lot to know people think about you and wonder how your coping, you have been on my mind a lot today as well, was keeping my fingers crossed for you Link to comment
feellikeafool Posted September 25, 2011 Author Share Posted September 25, 2011 Yo! I'm feeling the best I have felt for a long time today. Maybe it's because I know I haven't quite lost him, there is a chance of recon but we both need time, space and to work on things. I'm not going to contact him, I'll wait at least a week (we kind of agreed to check in on each other about once a week, but no hard set rules, just whenever we both wanted to but nothing too heavy). I am making plans to carry on with my life, and where I'm going to go next. I just so want him by my side! But I have to do this alone, get myself back together without him. I agree, a fast forward button would be so handy, haha! But we're getting there one day at a time. Look after yourself hey north, i'm so pleased that you had such a good day, i hope the hard part is over for you now and so glad you can have a positive outlook and see a clearer future for yourself and start making the effort to reach your goals, makes me happy that you had a happy day Link to comment
northpickle Posted September 26, 2011 Share Posted September 26, 2011 How you doing today, feel? Link to comment
feellikeafool Posted September 26, 2011 Author Share Posted September 26, 2011 How you doing today, feel? hey north, i'm not doing to bad today, thank you so much for asking i spent some time with family last night and that seems to have done me good, even though they dont know of the break up yet. i cant bring myself to tell people yet, i just want to get my thoughts and emotions together without people feeling sorry for me and having to go through all the details i was made redundant on friday so will be concentrating on finding a new job, i wasnt happy in my previous job anyway so they have done me a favour and i can look for my ideal job now how r u feeling today? i got told by DN (moderator) that i was using too much short cuts and text speak in my messages, its made me so conscience and have to go over what i write to make sure i dont make a mistake and get kicked out lol Link to comment
northpickle Posted September 26, 2011 Share Posted September 26, 2011 Hello Aw, you're different to me, nearly the first thing I did was tell some of my family members what was happening, I thought my head was going to explode with all the thoughts that were constantly running through my mind! I needed tell a few people as soon as possible (and have bugged them ever since!). I'm sorry you were made redundant but yes, this can also be a positive in disguise and make you think about what you really want to do in your life. I'm doing OK today (I'll update my thread a bit later), I've taken on some new responsibilities with my local political party which I'm a member of, so have plenty to get stuck into now. I'm still a tiny bit sad, of course, and thinking about him from time to time. And how I hope we truly can sort this out. But I'm already making steps in the right direction, I think. Hope you have a good day Link to comment
feellikeafool Posted September 26, 2011 Author Share Posted September 26, 2011 thats really good, your doing so well, i feel like a proud mother lol being sad is not a bad thing, its a reminder that your human and of the feelings you have for each other, if you stopped feeling at all and got over him you wouldn't want that either Link to comment
digdug Posted September 26, 2011 Share Posted September 26, 2011 thats really good, your doing so well, i feel like a proud mother lol being sad is not a bad thing, its a reminder that your human and of the feelings you have for each other, if you stopped feeling at all and got over him you wouldn't want that either ... it is sooooo good to hear you talking like that!!! You're doing good, keep grinding. How are you doing today? Link to comment
feellikeafool Posted September 26, 2011 Author Share Posted September 26, 2011 ... it is sooooo good to hear you talking like that!!! You're doing good, keep grinding. How are you doing today? hey dig, today is definatley one of my better days i must admit, even thought we had contact it has in fact been 2 weeks since we broke up, i wish in a way we did break contact a lot sooner as i would be a bit further down my road to recovery by now my thoughts still wonder a lot to how he is doing but i am so glad that i accepted that it is over, it has allowed me to heel, i couldn't deal with living in hope, whatever the future holds it holds, maybe we will be together maybe we wont, in the mean time we both have a lot of work to do on ourselves Link to comment
loulou37 Posted September 26, 2011 Share Posted September 26, 2011 hey dig, today is definatley one of my better days i must admit, even thought we had contact it has in fact been 2 weeks since we broke up, i wish in a way we did break contact a lot sooner as i would be a bit further down my road to recovery by now my thoughts still wonder a lot to how he is doing but i am so glad that i accepted that it is over, it has allowed me to heel, i couldn't deal with living in hope, whatever the future holds it holds, maybe we will be together maybe we wont, in the mean time we both have a lot of work to do on ourselves well you done amazingly well to get this far! my ex and me also split 2 weeks ago...i just couldn't give up hope...maybe i'm just alot weaker as i've been through this before not so long ago Link to comment
feellikeafool Posted September 26, 2011 Author Share Posted September 26, 2011 well you done amazingly well to get this far! my ex and me also split 2 weeks ago...i just couldn't give up hope...maybe i'm just alot weaker as i've been through this before not so long ago dont worry lou it was very hard for me to accept too, these things take time and every one has their own way of coping, you are doing just fine, dont be so hard on yourself and hang in there Link to comment
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