Naomi99 Posted August 18, 2011 Share Posted August 18, 2011 Here is some background. We have an incredible history together. Boyfriend and I have known each other since we were in the 7th grade. We were high school sweethearts, then he broke my heart when we were 19, he wanted to go traveling, and I never saw him again. Nine years later, I ran into him at a party. We're both 28 at this point, and we immediately jumped into a passionate relationship. Never got married, but we bought a house together. First five years were a fabulous relationship...the last five had a lot of ups and downs. We are now 38. We sold the house and are currently living apart. He broke up with me because he said the relationship was stagnant, we both were not growing together, and we lost our identities due to the relationship. He said he wanted to learn new things, revive his old passions like photography and traveling and meeting new people and exploring the unknown. At first I put up a fight, but I let him go. After a lengthy telephone call, he sent me an email saying that he cares about me and wants to be my friend, but he wants us both to be happy and to move on. I never responded to his email and went NC for two months. I never heard from him at all during this time. So the other day, I had lunch with a mutual friend, and she told me that my ex was leaving the country at the end of this month for an undisclosed amount of time. I was shocked. I don't know if I should contact my ex to say something. I have no idea how he feels about me at this point. If I had an inkling that he cared, I would call, but I'm so afraid of what I am going to hear. I have been in love with my ex for nearly 25 years. I believe he is my soulmate. I still love him and I miss him so much, the pain I feel is like battery acid in my blood. Every day I tell myself that he will never meet anyone with a stronger connection or incredible history than the one we shared, and I just keep hoping that he will realize this after he goes through his midlife crisis. My friend tells me I should stop being so stubborn and call him because this trip he takes could be the end of any hope of getting back together. She believes that this could be a life-changing trip for him, and once he's gone anything could happen; he might stay there, he could die in a plane accident, he could meet somebody. She also believes he's leaving because he trying to forget about me, and hearing my voice before his trip might be a good thing. In my heart, I do not want to contact him because, yes, I am stubborn. I feel like I would have lost my self-esteem and all the hard work I put into NC for the past two months. I feel like HE should be the one to contact me, if he truly cared to say goodbye. I have no idea when he is leaving, just "at the end of the month," so I have to act quickly. (or not act at all) 1. If I do not contact him and wait to see what he does, this will really show his true colors if he doesn't call to say goodbye. 2. If I call first, I will never know if he intended to say goodbye without my prompting. Please please please, your input. Should I get off my high horse and just call him, or let things be and play out on their own? Link to comment
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.