Help Please?

[happyguy23]

Sorry if this is long but i really need help.

Alright so im new to this but here we go. I dated a girl for a month treated her very well as all my friends said always was there for her. I always sent good morning text's. I left her video messages on her facebook. We didn't get to see each other on halloween so i brought her in candy before class. I never talked to any other girl other than her. She always told me i treated her the best ever. I told her i didn't want to have sex with her till i could look her in the eyes and tell her "i love you" This girls past is insane with the running back to her ex and what not. So it was close to our one month and i wanted to spoil her and show her that i care about her. So i gave her a dinnner at my house and i took her to the movies. She broke up with me a week later. We were going through a rough patch but i wasn't gonna give up she told me that things werent going well but to not give up on her. so i didnt give up on her. She broke up with me two days later and i was destroyed. I finally fall for someone and it ends early. So i go no contact for four or five days and i break it because she is destroyed. I told her that i gave her four days with out me in your life and for her to see what life would like to be without me. I eventually let her come back and we were working on things. One day we were in my car kissing and she told me she was hanging with this guy and not to worry hes nothing and not to worry, but i worry when they say not to worry. So that night i got pissed cuz i was going through a hard time and she made me feel like ****. I blew her off cuz her messaged pretty much read go **** urself find someone who cares. So i was like **** it then we fought some more and i was like this is terrible i don't want to hurt her i just want her to be happy. So i took her to dinner a week later and we had fun we kissed at the end of the night and she told me she would text me later. She never did and i was kinda pissed but it was what it was. So i helped her with one of her classes and she said all this good stuff and said she wanted to hang on thurs. I was tired so i went to bed and the i called her and she didn't answer and so on till thurs. Thursday came around and i was like i take it were not going and she was like we didn't make plans and im like u didn't pick up ur phone. So she went no contact. TIll my friend sent me a message asking if my ex was dating and to look at this pic and he sent me a photo of her kissing another guy on the cheek. I was so p.o. it wasn't even funny and the sad thing was it was with the guy she said there was nothing there. So i did digging cuz i care and everyone told me hes a manipulator and a dbag and a scumbag. I left a message which i shouldn't and she took it the wrong way and told me to **** myself and that i had no business which she was right but i just wanted her to tell me that she liked him so i could move on and know there was nothing there. So classes started up again and i ignored her and was happy as hell. She saw this and texted me i know this is random but i hope ur doing well and to tell me that she didn't have a problem with me. I didn't respond then my friend told me he ran into her and she was like hey and then she asked how he was doing she asked him how she was doing than asked if he still lifted with me and how i was doing. I was in awwe cuz it was really weird so i was like whatever. So like she would walk behind me and stuff during class. She made the photo of her and that guy her photo and she never did that when she was with me. She made an album of him playing his sport and made that the only thing publicly. Im just wondering why? I started dating someone after all that and we broke up the day after i hand wrote my ex a letter saying i was sorry for the way i acted and changed during the break up. I said i was sorry for the way i acted and owed her new bf and apology and her family. I said i wasnt going to bother her with this and hoped she way happy. She texted me saying apology accepted and she was sorry for her part and she was happy. Then she texted me later saying that i have a big hear and to never change that. I have deleted my facebook and its been almost a month since i have seen her. I have started to fix myself because she told my friend the reason we broke up was that i was clingy. So i have started to fix this for me and for my next relationship for if she comes back or if someone else comes along. I really want her to be happy but i also miss her am i doing the right thing to get her back? Do you think she will come back? I kinda gave up on the thought that she will come back because i know that when u least expect it someone will come along be it ur ex or someone new. What should i do?

[Silverbirch]

She might come back later, but I think you need to remain NC for a while. That will give you time to work on yourself. I think that also maybe you were seeing too much of her too soon, and unfortunately, with both sexes, when it is obvious one person is REALLY, REALLY keen on the other, it can cause the other person to distance themselves, and I wouldn't be surprised if this is what happened. I'm not saying don't be nice, but just cool it a little and let her come to you, and maybe even chase you a bit.

[MaxPayne19]

You should have just ignored her and left it at that. You shouldn't have texted her saying you were sorry for the way you acted. You have every right to act that way since she pulled a 180 on you and probably was lying to you for a while. I think you were being too nice about it and should have just been laid back and cool. She will continue to think you are clingly if you appologize for stuff you are not guilty of. Let her go with this guy and learn the hard way of the kind of d-bag that he is.

[happyguy23]

silverbirch. You are right i am a nice guy that is why i have gone no contact with alot of people. Since college ended like a month ago i have done alot to better myself. I dont know if going back to facebook would be a good idea. I just wanted to build up the thought of me be going for her to miss me because i never gave her the essential miss me for a while then come back. I was really good to her and i know she will miss me as u will miss people who come into ur life and make a positive impact. I was just suprised it ended so soon because all her friends liked me but they all agreed that i was to into her to much. I told her though what would u want to be with someone who is gonna treat u like a princess and is going to do something to make u smile or someone who treats u like * * * * . She obviously will learn the hard way it just sucks that she is not smart enough to realize the good guys are the way to go. I just dont know if shes smart enough to come back. I have kinda started giving up hope and am barely hanging on everyone tells me as soon as u give up they come back or they always come back just takes longer for some then others.

Maxpayne19 i did ignore her for a long time after she blew me off i was p.o. as u would be. Your right she did pull a 180 on me and there is no excuse for that, but when i saw the photo flipped like i said and found stuff out about him then i ignored her for like a couple months. Then i felt bad because im not a bad guy i look for the good in everyone. I have a strong catholic upbringing and thats why i treat people so well. Yes there are people i dislike as anyone. I apologized and then went complete no contact i deleted my facebook and that has been it. Your right her actions spoke way louder than her words. I even told her that because we were talking and all she was doing was hanging out with that guy. I asked her why she never wanted and she was like he always call i thought, "uh huh right he called u with my head nodding." I shouldve stayed no contact because at the beginning it was working. Shes not the brightest tool in the shed when it comes to dating either. I just want the best for her and i know the best thing i can do right now and for the time being is just distance myself from her. Let the fond memories of how great i was to her flood her thoughts when she gets into a fight with him.