sweet gesture towards ex gf, may ruin chances? :s

[ned2010]

i ordered 2 tickets to a concert where famous bands and singers are playing, i was planning on taking her to it, but things ended, and i had a choice to sell them on or do something else with them, as they aint refundable

 

the bands and singers aint really my type of music, i originally got them because 3 of her favorite boy bands are playing and would of made her very excited and happy

 

so to my topic... i was thinking oh hell gonna have to sell them (disapointment), then i noticed a friend of my ex on facebook, and i asked her what she was doing on the date this concerts on, she asked why? i said i can send you 2 tickets to go to this concert but only if she takes my ex with her, and her friend said yes of course she will and she got very excited

 

her friend wants to surprise my ex few days before the concert so my ex dont know about them yet, and my ex wil proberly know they were from me as she knew my plan was to originally take her to it

 

i thought about selling them but its a once in a life time thing and if you know it will make someone happy how i could i sell them to anyone else.... am just worried this will counteract my NC

[thekid55]

Sell the tickets.

[ned2010]

i kinda already said id give them to her friend now, i did it a while over 15 days ago

[DN]

I think it's a nice thing to do. Go ahead.

[CrapAtNC]

I think it's the perfect thing to do. Most guys would use this as a desperate way to get their ex to hang out with them, but you're not; you're saying "You go have fun; I'm cool."

 

I'm sure this won't harm your chances at all. Just keep on being the man and don't expect anything in return for your kind gesture.

[bish0p2004]

It's cool to give her the tickets, but only if you're not expecting her to say, "Oh, ned is such a nice guy to have given us these tickets....I want to try again with him!"

[woodc5]

I agree with the above posters. It's a nice gesture, but don't expect anything in return from it.

[Ariel85]

Give the friend the tickets. It's a very selfless gesture. I'd be touched.

[ned2010]

I agree with the above posters. It's a nice gesture, but don't expect anything in return from it.

 

i have never asked anything in return from her for anything tbh dno what that makes me!

[LanceVanceDance]

It's a nice gesture and it's not really "breaking no contact". It's not like you're going to talk to her or anything. She should appreciate the gesture.

[ned2010]

she is gonna find out tomoz, hmm... should i expect a thank you?

[ned2010]

she found out and was thanking me loads for it

[ned2010]

ok the concert was today, and i didnt really hear from her much at all, i was hoping to at least hear about her day, but she didnt give me the benefit for some reason, maybe she has a new guy interest

[thekid55]

ok the concert was today, and i didnt really hear from her much at all, i was hoping to at least hear about her day, but she didnt give me the benefit for some reason, maybe she has a new guy interest

 

You are truly reaching for crumbs at this point. The point of you giving her the tickets was to be 'nice'. You need to stop being so 'nice' with her. She has a new man. Let her go.

 

If you gave her tickets this time, she'll be expecting more for you in the future.

 

Would you give her more tickets if she asked/begged you to do it for you?

[ned2010]

no i wouldnt give her more, it was just to make her happy

 

and she dont have a new man, she is trying to get one though

[thedude27]

ok the concert was today, and i didnt really hear from her much at all, i was hoping to at least hear about her day, but she didnt give me the benefit for some reason, maybe she has a new guy interest

 

 

You shouldn't expect any response at all(She did thank you), you did it to be nice right not to hear from her and have a chance to talk?

 

It doesnt mean she has someone else or not(if she didnt before she probably still doesnt now), but it really doesnt matter if she does. You are WAY overanalyzing this and there is no possible way you can talk to her in a heathy manner right now. You need to let her go at least for now. Dont even think about calling and using this as an excuse to talk to her, you're going to ruin the gesture.

 

Time to work on moving past this, maybe in the future she'll start missing you, but until(or if) that happens you have to start moving on. I know how you feel right now and its REALLY going to suck for a while, but you need to work hard to move on.