A little advice, or perhaps an opinion

[potato]

I don't normally post stuff like this on the net... I don't really know why I am now; it's just that I would prefer to have a second opinion. And, everyone on here seems to have pretty good advice/views to give. There's a lot of typing, it seems like I'm rambling slightly… I don't know I'm just trying to get all of the thoughts about what's going on and what's happening out of my head.

 

There is a girl that I know, we go to school together and I've known her for about five or six years. We've always been really good friends, ever since we first met each other at a fairly young age (about grade 5 or so). Ever since I first met her, I've always had the strange ability to talk to her and trust her no matter what (and vice versa). We always seem to get along well and she does really bring out the "best" in me (I don't know why that is or how to explain it, but it seems that I'm always doing the right thing around her, and that I have no worries in the world). I suppose the best word for how we act around each other is 'comfortable'. Last semester (we're in high school now) we sat beside each other in art in our own little table group (just the two of us). She came in and sat accross from me the first day. At first I thought nothing of it; it was just because we were friends I figured. In the first week, some of her friends in the class asked her to sit with them. She said something like "no, I'm happy where I am". I thought it was odd, but figured maybe she was being nice because I would be sitting by myself otherwise. I was forced to move – the teacher needed our table group for some presentation or demonstration – a little later on in the year, so I moved to a group away from the rest of the class (I'm a shy person, but not with her). Automatically, she came and sat in the seat beside me (this occurred one other time during the semester) and stated that she liked it better here - where we stayed for the rest of the semester.

 

At one point, she sat in their table group for only one period. I don't understand why that was, but I noticed that she always seemed to be glancing at me occasionally – I thought perhaps it was some kind of a test and that maybe she wanted me to come it beside her I decided not to, I don't really get along with some of her friends that well and, I would have preferred to work alone then sit next to some of them. I dont enjoy getting into fights with her friends - even though she supports me in the fights usually.

 

It was about the middle of the semester that she first mentioned doing some stuff in our spare time. I was interested in doing stuff with her outside of school – she's actually very cute and I must admit that I like her enough to consider asking her out… If I had the guts… I noticed throughout this period that she was acting differently then she use to even a few weeks/months before. (Note, I'm not exactly the "best" at picking up signals but I believe that I might have found some. Maybe you guys can find some from what she did). She first suggested (over MSN) that I go to a summer camp with her and be a leader She described it and I thought it would be great. She was adamant that I go with her and that it would be the most fun I've ever had in my life. I thought it was a great idea, so I asked more. I was told that it was a 6 weeks slightly church oriented (I'm not very religious, which was a slight problem) camp. (I asked her friends if she had invited them to the camp and they replied with no At the camp, you would teach the children for about an hour to two hours a day and then you could do whatever else you wanted for the rest of the day. This was a fairly big shock to me; I don't really know what I thought at the time. She really wanted me to go, and we talked for about an hour to two about what was there and what it was like. At this point in time, she invited me to go to her church and some other stuff outside of class. She is a fairly religious person, I'm not so religious – I haven't attended church in years but I do believe in god and I did go to Sunday school. I would agree to go with her - and I promised that I would attend atleast one session of at her church - but I feel as though that is some how wrong in a way. Using a church and her beliefs to better my standing with her seems wrongto me - what do you guys think?

 

I decided that I could go to the camp, but, I unfortunately didn't meet with the requirements for being a leader (I will next year though). Her friends constantly badgered her during this time to sit by them in class, and she constantly refused saying that she would rather sit where she was. Later on in the year I heard her talking to one of her friends – I wasn't eaves dropping by any means, it was just an idle conversation outside of the class room while I was inside and I could hear it. Anyways, her friend asked her "Joes a weird kid, you know that right? What do you like so much about him? Just come sit next to us." She replied with something like "because he's cute and a nice guy and I like him" What this means, I don't really know But, it's a given that she thinks I'm an alright guy.

 

During this time, I noticed that she was taking an interest in my life (and vice versa). I also noticed that she was being playful and, what I would call, flirting - I was probably flirting myself as well. I would catch her staring at me out of the corner of my eye occasionally, and when I looked at her she would blush slightly and look away. She would also always glance at me several times during the class. During this time she also developed a slight habit of drawing on me with paint and "testing" parts for her clay head out on me (ie the ears for the head she was making) by slapping the clay onto me and then cutting out the required sizes/shapes. She cut me once – it was just a scratch but it was bleeding slightly – while she was doing this, and acted protective and almost "motherly" to me about it

 

Before the end of the year, she was disappointed that I couldn't go with her to the summer camp - I was as well, it would have been a great chance to spend more time with her outside of school. Spending time with her almost all day, every day for six weeks? Thats sounded (and still sounds) great to me! It was a really big thing to her, I guess. I feel bad for not being able to go, and I really would love to be there rather then here working all summer.

 

I don't know what you guys think. It seems that she likes me in some way, maybe as a good friend, I don't really know. I do know that I wish I was at that summer camp with her… I would ask her out, but I'm afraid that it's too strange, us being good friends and all - I'm sure she doesn't have a boyfriend. But, what do you guys think? Do you think she likes me in some kind of way?

 

Thanks for any input at all!

[sisterlynch]

Yes she likes you. I read all that so I had to answer just to let you know that I read it...

 

It is natural that more assertive people will hang out with less assertive people, that is just the way of the jungle.

 

Also I don't see any real problem with going to her church just to see if you like it or get to know her better, but if you feel a sense of hypocrisy about that then follow your own best judgement.

[Francis]

For sure you're not very fast at picking up signals! It seems that this girl likes you A LOT and you should DO SOMETHING before she meets someone else!!!!!

 

She seems to be rather patient with you but her patience may run out. Do something and let us know!

[Jerseygirl]

yea she DEF. likes you. i agree with francis, do something about it while u can. I understand you are a shy kid, but it looks like a great opportunity for you. I doubt she will turn you down, you should ask her out immediately!

[Alabama]

She likes you. a lot. It seems that she gets embarrassed around you, and blushes too. Also if she admitted that she likes you through a friend, then that also answers your question. I would definetly talk to her more, and maybe if you wanted too, ask her out on a date or something. Good luck!

[Shinobie]

Ya man id love to be in the situation ur in right now... its sounding very good for u man it sounds like some pretty serious stuff that u should go after right now.It sounds like some tight bond that can maybe happen for a lifetime but iono it just sounds very good but iono how old u r?Cause u might be at that early age but things definitely sound great go for it man go for it.

[potato]

Im 17 years old. Shes 16 and a half, well probably about 3/4 now. I wish I could talk to her right now (or even see her for that matter ) - but shes at the summer camp you see... Its been about two-three weeks though, so its nearing the half-way point But, when she gets back I'll be sure to talk to her, maybe I'll even go to her church and ask her out depending on how things go. It might seem weird - since I havent gone to church in so long - but I'm sure it will be fun. Man... I wish that dang summer camp would end soon! I forgot to mention that she also suggeste doing some volunteer thing after school as well.

 

Thanks for the replies - maybe there will be some more.

[Shinobie]

Ya man good luck and i hope everything goes well.

[potato]

Thanks

[potato]

Well, I was just talking to her on MSN for about 45-50 min... She gets this weekend off for the civic holiday in Canada but shes going up to her cottage so we cant do anything She started talking to me right away when she came on MSN... It was great to talk to her - I also saw her (and she saw me) while I was driving home after work but I didnt have time to stop and talk to her because the watermain outside my house broken So the street was flooded She understood that i couldn't talk to her though, which is great

 

She'll be back in two weeks after this though, so I'm planning on talking to her then and seeing if she wants to do something. I dunno how to go about it though - I guess I'll just ask if she wants to do something and let her suggest but perhaps having a plan or idea would be better? Any suggestions on whats safe to do or suggest doing with her? I'm thinking something fun, like a movie or miniput or something... Or maybe going out to the city together... I dunno about a movie though, since that might be weird...

 

Thanks again for any help!

I feel sooooo good after talking to her, like I'm flying a billion miles above the earth

[Santa]

You should ask her out asap. Trust me mate, a day can make a big differance, as someone else might ask her out before you. Make the oppertunity to ask her out - if your going home or whatever, quickly stop and ask her out, it'll only take like a few seconds. Good luck.

[aireyc]

Dude, she clearly likes you. Stop worrying about what is weird or may not be comfortable. I could see that if you are having mixed signals, but she clearly likes you for who you are so you have nothing to worry about. And, if you've known her for a while, it should be a slam dunk.

 

Chris

[potato]

Alright, shes gone now She won't be back for a couple of weeks but I'll see when she comes back

 

Thanks.