My brother died last week

[nenez]

Hi everyone

My brother died last week. He has been ill for a short while but his death was really sudden. I spoke the eulogy at his funeral and i just through I would share what i said. I find it helps to focus on the happy life we had before he was so ill and thought someof you may like to see this. As always with love to you all

Nenez

 

I don't know all the people who are here and I don't know what connection that you had with Giles. It may be that you worked with him, or were part of his life in the Territorial Army. You may have shared his life as part of the church where he was a chorister, a server and member of the bell ringing team. You may be a friend from the social side of his life. Whatever the connection, you are here as we all are, to celebrate Giles' life, to celebrate his quest for perfection in everything that he did, to celebrate his humour, his love of music and debate and his thirst for knowledge. You are here to share in the life that he had and to wish him safely on his last journey.

 

I cannot speak for what Giles meant to you, but this is who he was for me. He was my big brother. He walked me to school and held my hand. He looked after me every day even if he didn't want to. He made sure I didn't get into any trouble which was difficult because I always did. We played knock down ginger very day on the way to school and we never got caught because we looked so innocent. He made a camp with me and we had rosehip fights with our catapults in the sunken road. We put bangers into cowpats and exploded them.

 

We went blackberry picking together and scrumped apples from the orchard. He let me ride his cartie. It was Giles who taught me how to ride a bike and how to draw a spitfire in a dogfight. He taught me to love Gilbert and Sullivan and he knew every word of the Mikado and Pirates of Penzance. We used to sing them word for word endlessly and re-enact the performances with our friends.

 

When we went on holiday, Biddi and I always managed to get cut off by the tide. Giles always had to rescue us in a boat. After the third or fourth time he had got really quite good at rowing.

 

We played a game called Basingstoke where I had to be Mad Margaret Giles was Edward, captain of the guard and Biddi always had to be Rupert the dog. I can't remember the point of it except that you had to pull each other off your bikes. We played Snowballs café. There wasn't much point to that either except I remember you had to pull each other off your bikes.

 

Whenever it snowed we always made a snowman. They got bigger and better as we got older and often quite anatomically correct. Whenever it snows I always think of Giles putting snowballs down my neck, which he never failed to do.

 

In his room he had a steam engine that he had built from scratch. He used to make it work with metholated spirits and it worked and blew real steam. It's only when you see the average offerings of boys his age that you realize just how truly bright and talented he was.

 

He taught me to do brass rubbings and how to make a catapult that really worked. He showed me how to fire an air gun and we shot his teddy to bits on the washing line.

 

He taught me the value of reasoned debate. He could debate any issue for hours and never lose his focus or his temper. He could play monopoly for ten minutes and lose his temper in three.

 

He taught me all the rude jokes that anyone could ever want to know and we laughed our heads off even though we didn't understand them.

 

He was a cub and a scout and we used to go and watch him in the gang shows. He had to be a garden gnome and sit on a plastic toadstool. He had to wear a yellow tutu and be a ballet dancer. The only time he ever balked was when he had to wear a pink dress and sing I feel pretty. He had a wonderful soprano voice and he sang in the choir here at St Mary's. He was recorded with the Godstone choir for the BBC and mummy used to say that even over all the other voices you could hear him sing because his voice was so high and sweet.

 

When we were teenagers we went everywhere together. He had long hair and a pair of dungarees with ducks on. He pulled a funny face when he danced and he was never any good at darts. He held my hand when I cried and told me I was beautiful even though I had spots and never washed my hair. He fixed up dates for me with his friends when I couldn't get one of my own.

 

He celebrated our weddings and the birth of my son.

 

He was proud of me when I was clever even though of all of us he was the brightest. He listened to our troubles and he never let us down.

 

I don't know who he was to you, but he was my big brother. He was the brother who never let me down and that is how I shall remember him.

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nenez

 

im sorry to hear of your loss, your brother seemed to be some kind fo a guy.

 

Im really sorry that i don't know what to say in the situation but i give you my condolances (i think that means summit important, i see it on movies, heh)

 

Im Sorry...

 

 

ToGgLe

[avman]

Nenez,

 

My deepest sympathies on your loss. It must have been very difficult for you to say the eulogy. I performed this at my fathers funeral and found it extremely tough. Yet I'm very glad I did it, even to this day. I saved the original handwritten notes I had and when I miss him I still pull them out and read what I had written years ago. Your eulogy is very touching and I'm sure your brother was unbelievably proud of you.

 

May God be with you and give you comfort in these difficult times.

 

avman

[oxygen_lsv]

i'm sorry to hear that... i guess i dunno how you feel cuz i never really lost someone that has been with me for a long time... my parents died when i was young so i guess it's a different feeling...

[Meow18]

Wow. I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. It must have been so hard for you, but I'm proud that you had the courage to say this. I'm sure your brother would be proud as well. It was really very touching to me. His loss will be hard for you, but you will always have those happy & even the sad memories to remember about him.

I hope you are doing ok. Please pm me if you need any kind of advice or even if you just want to talk.

[Mar]

Nenez,

 

My heart goes out to you, as I'm sure everyone's does. Death is difficult even when expected, and nearly impossible to deal with when unexpected, because it doesn't follow the "natural order of things." But I'm very glad to hear you spoke his eulogy, and the heartfelt and warm things you said about him, as I'm sure he is! Just remember that he IS with you, and is watching you, and you'll see him again one day. If you ever need to talk, we're here and have strong shoulders for support.

 

Mar

[i_hate_the_world47]

Nenez,

I am so sorry to hear about your loss.Your brother did seem like a nice man and its good that in your eulogy you focused not really on how he died but how well he lived.I know death is hard,but it should be about remembering the ones who have passed.I hope you remember that and i hope you remember how much fun you had with your brother,It will help.God Bless.

 

~Meagan~

[Katheelynn]

Im amazed at how beautiful your memories of him are. What a tribute to the love for your brother. Thank you for sharing that with me.