I feel like an idiot...

[Shnoodle]

Not sure the best sub-forum to post this, but this will have to do. I'm very irritated and I need to vent.

 

Late last year, my ex and I broke up. If you want there's a few threads that describe his past hot and colds that chased me away from a possible reconciliation. We stopped talking for a while, then started again recently where he came on much stronger. Very little cold between the hots, I guess you could say.

 

At first I thought "no chance", but after a while of hearing him sound rather sweet, it became a "maybe..". This went on for a few weeks, till yesterday. Sadly, even though I stopped looking back on our old relationship a long time ago, I developed a bit of a crush on him. He'd tell me he really missed me, flirt with me non-stop, at one point he even sent me some of the lyrics to BoB's "Nothing On You"... I thought it was likely that he was trying to say something there. Based on his words, I thought he may be regretful, and that he really had serious feelings for me. I guess I got the wrong impression.

 

So today, a friend tells me that he's seen my ex with a new girlfriend... and I confront him. Though he's not mine to be possessive of, I did feel a little jealous. He's not obligated to wait for me and I did want to see him happy, but it's also inappopriate to talk to me the way he does while in a relationship. I didn't get angry or anything with him, but it felt so awkward, like a slow motion train wreck. He said he "flirts" with lots of girls, and it doesn't mean anything. I was entirely embarrassed, and this was probably the first time it showed that I did actually like him... even if I did look like a giant dork. (I'm not good with opening up to people.)

 

So yeah.. I'm left with a sour taste in my mouth, and the realization that it's likely that I'm not only just a chick whom he just flirts with, but that I'm not 100% ok seeing him date other people. Us being friends is just not a good idea. Last evening I asked for him to speak with me, I wanted to tell him... well, a summary of this post. I left the option open for him, because he doesn't owe me any "talk". I waited, he blew me off. So now... I'm left feeling like an idiot for getting a crush on an ex. Feeling like an idiot for thinking he wanted more from me.. but proud that I'm not going to waste another breath on a person who doesn't care. Far from heart broken, but very disappointed that I got played. I thought he was better than that.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

He sounds like a jerk. His girlfriend has her hands full coping with a guy he needs legions of female fans and who will do anything to get those fans. Don't be so hard on yourself. He is the pathetic one who can't seem to survive without adoration from many people.

[Firiel]

It sounds like you are better off without this guy. From what you've said, it does sound like he was leading you on which is at best an unkind thing to do to you and at worst disrespectful to his current girlfriend. Be glad you found out now, though, before anything other than flirting had the chance to happen. You'll find someone better.

[Shnoodle]

He claimed this woman was not his girlfriend, though he flirts with a lot of girls. My friend had said they looked pretty cuddly. He's entitled to keep his options open, and I'm entitled to refuse to be one of them.

[Firiel]

He claimed this woman was not his girlfriend, though he flirts with a lot of girls. My friend had said they looked pretty cuddly. He's entitled to keep his options open, and I'm entitled to refuse to be one of them.

 

Exactly. Way to take control of your life and your decisions!

[ClueLessGlow]

seems like he just wants to have a lot of options... and he didnt count on someone telling your abou the other girl even tho ur not together... but its messed up to be sweet talking you and flirty if he knows you and what tickels you from when you used to be together... not cool

hope things ill get easier for you! u deserve better!