Women ages 25+ i need your imput.

[MD Geist]

I Think I have found a lead about my difficulties in the dating world and that is I'm just attracted to older women than me. Not because I want to sleep with them but I connect with them better than I do with women who are as old as me or younger. I never really had the oppertuntity to be a "Child" growing up with my dad departing from my life I had no choice but to man up on my own, for a brief period of time in my early 20's all of my friends where substantially older than me, they where all 40+ of course now things have changed in the last 3 years for the better and now I have a larger network of friends ranging from ages 16-86.

 

But Every girl I have wanted to date has been a few years older than me, only a handful of exceptions I have fancied younger women but the crush usually doesn't last long. I always end up finding myself wanting to be with someone else who is mature, someone who is past the party life.

 

I'm 23 but will be 24 on the first of the month and have never had a girlfriend or kissed a woman at that, been on some unoffical dates more like hangout sessions with women. I have struggled with weight issues but as i'm getting older things have improved with my life, I walked 6 miles a few weeks ago. I'm studying for my series 6 license and currently hold a life insurance license which i'm hoping to get into that field as well as I'm in the process of becoming a partner in a design broker firm with a friend of mine. My goals are within the next year or so to be moved into a place that is not with roomates nor an apartment maybe a nice town home of my own, save and invest more money, really enjoy my life. I rarely go out, I don't drink or smoke. I guess the only thing I can say I do thats a bit risky is I do enjoy the street racing scene but I'm into cars as a hobby, I stay out late for that purpose only.

 

What does an older woman look for in a younger man is I guess what I'm trying to ask for?

 

I do understand that her biological clock is ticking and she might have some insecurities from her past relationships but in trade Maturity just as i want, Independence, Although I'm not looking for a suger momma or someone to move in with but someone who thinks for herself and doesn't wait for a guy to come along and do everything for her. Experience, Anything that perhaps she could teach me life wise is helpful.

 

If there is anything I have learned about approaching women who are older is you could date them but its very difficult. Most of the time they think when a younger guy wants them its for the sole purpose of trying to hookup with them for the night, sadly many men before me have screwed it up for men like me who are looking for something else beyond just sex. Its very hard to crack the ice from my experience.

 

I do not know what to do or how to approach. Should I have been considering an older girl? Is there something i'm lacking? Does experience matter?.

[Citlali]

I am engaged to a 23 year old and I am 25. At first I was wary of dating him because he was younger and I was afraid that he would be immature but I soon realized that he wasn't. On top of being as mature as I am, he has a job, a car, goes to school, and is very independent. Moreover, and most importantly, he treats me very well. He is respectful, loyal, honest, caring, sincere, etc. And that's exactly what I was looking for. I have dated men older than me who turned out to be rotten people. So really age shouldn't matter as long as you have these sort of qualities. Treat them well, show them age is but a number, and you should be fine.

 

Approach them as you would any woman. We don't require any special techniques. I don't think you're lacking anything, unless you're a terrible person. Like I said, it may be that they are wary of certain issues, but you have to try anyway. My fiance did. And there is nothing wrong with considering an older girl. Experience does matter insofar as it goes to your being able to be mature and handle life. I mean, I wouldn't care if you had never had a gf as long as you had the qualities I was looking for and acted properly and were willing to just learn as you went. Ultimately, though they may doubt you, you have to try anyway and tell them and then show them you don't just want to hook up. If you're still there even if they refuse to sleep with you right away or at all, then it will signal to them you may want something more.

[Jetta]

Well I can't really answer your question, although I am an "older woman" generally I'm looking for younger than me guys because that's where my maturity level is at this stage of life, but attract older than me guys always.

 

IMO older woman are looking for someone they can relate to emotionally, physically, etc. They want someone whose ready to commit to them for life, someone who is ready to settle down, established, etc. It's tough for a younger guy whose interested in older woman for sure, but once you settle down a bit yourself you'll be more apt to attract them again IMO.

[shessofly]

my boyfriend wasn't looking for an older woman and i was not looking for a younger man. it just happened. what i was hoping and praying for in general was someone who was truly capable of loving me and who could be loyal. he has been all that and more. i wasn't looking for money, or a fancy car, or any of those kinds of things. he's a real sweetheart and i hope he's for keeps. i'm in my early 30s and he is in his early 20s. if anyone had asked me a year ago would i ever even consider dating someone so much younger than me i would have thought they were crazy. and there is no biological clocking ticking in this gal. i'm all for taking it nice and slow.

[Sparkly Eyes]

first of all, I don't like to be classified as an "older woman",lol. I wouldn't mind dating a younger guy at all, as long as he is smart, mature and have the same goals as mine.

[annie24]

you say you don't get out much. what are your hobbies? can you join some hobbies where you can meet women naturally? do you go to church? can you join some kind of outdoor group or whatever - somewhere you can meet some women?

 

as a woman over 25, i'd say that i'm looking for a man with some directions and passions in his life. he doesn't need to 'be there' yet, but as long as he has ambition and isn't sort of drifting along. the fact that you are studying and have plans for your future career, that is a good sign. i'm also looking for someone who is fun and nice, someone who would be comfortable going to parties or just staying in or going hiking. someone who is a good listener and is a good communicator.

 

hang in there! i think you are on a good path, i think it's just a matter of time before you find a gf.

[MD Geist]

you say you don't get out much. what are your hobbies? can you join some hobbies where you can meet women naturally? do you go to church? can you join some kind of outdoor group or whatever - somewhere you can meet some women?

 

hang in there! i think you are on a good path, i think it's just a matter of time before you find a gf.

 

I have hobbies but non of them I really can't meet women through it because most of the time, the women I do meet through it is because their boyfriend or husband got them involved so I doubt ill meet anyone that way.

 

Church, yes I'm doing it, Plenty of out door activities to where I can meet someone for sure. Its just very difficult even with 3000 to choose from.

[annie24]

the women I do meet through it is because their boyfriend or husband got them involved so I doubt ill meet anyone that way.

 

people break up.

 

that and you never know who you will meet through those women or their boyfriends. for example say you meet one of them, and she invites you to a BBQ for her boyfriend's birthday, and you wind up going and meeting his single sister....

[MD Geist]

people break up.

 

that and you never know who you will meet through those women or their boyfriends. for example say you meet one of them, and she invites you to a BBQ for her boyfriend's birthday, and you wind up going and meeting his single sister....

 

But how would you go about asking a woman who is lets just say 28+ years old on a date?. Does a coffee date work for all ages or is she going to be expecting more than that?

 

first of all, I don't like to be classified as an "older woman",lol. I wouldn't mind dating a younger guy at all, as long as he is smart, mature and have the same goals as mine.

 

Hey women who are more mature are awesome people. I prefer them over the younger more immature women. They are smart, they know what they want and they are sexy.

[annie24]

i think coffee is a fine first date. ice cream as well. i think it's just fine.

[Tanzi]

my boyfriend wasn't looking for an older woman and i was not looking for a younger man. it just happened. what i was hoping and praying for in general was someone who was truly capable of loving me and who could be loyal. he has been all that and more. i wasn't looking for money, or a fancy car, or any of those kinds of things. he's a real sweetheart and i hope he's for keeps. i'm in my early 30s and he is in his early 20s. if anyone had asked me a year ago would i ever even consider dating someone so much younger than me i would have thought they were crazy. and there is no biological clocking ticking in this gal. i'm all for taking it nice and slow.

 

That is the same for me. I bumped into an aquaintence a little while ago who told me she had recently married a guy 10 years younger than herself and although I congratulated her I was at the same time thinking "why on earth would you want to do that". To me a relationship with a much younger guy would be fraught with insecurities. Now some months later I find myself in a relationship with a guy 15 years younger than myself that just keeps on going from strength to strength. I never saw this coming and would never have predicted this in a million years. I wasn't looking for a relationship with a youger guy. We met, we clicked and it just happened.

 

He doesn't want children and I already have 3 so in that sense we are compatible. Despite the age difference we are compatible in so many ways that neither of us know the age difference is there. It really is just about two people who are right for each other.

 

Of course there are other issues ... how will he take to my children and feel about being around them? He is only 27 what, happens if he changes his mind in a few years time and does want children?

 

There are lots of questions you could ask yourself in a situation like this but at the end of the day if two people really click they will find a way to be together whatever the odds or obstacles.

[MD Geist]

Since giving up on dating all together I have decided the best thing for me to do is continue to make friends with women in the age group I fancy, there is just something facnating about an older woman and her maturity. I'm not sure what it is and no it has nothing to do with her sexyness.

 

I'm going to continue to meet older women as much as possible and learn from them because there is a lot I can learn from them and they can provide me with a lot of great leads. The oldest woman I know is in her mid 50's and she gave me the oppertunty I have today to go into business for myself along with learning a lot about life in general. They do not have immaturty issues like the younger girls do. They know what they want and they are very patient and forgiving.

[greywolf]

I'm not an 'older woman', but my bf is 20. I think we get along because even though there's an age difference, we're still kind of in the same stages of life. I'm still finishing up school and so is he. If I already had a career, I'm not sure how I'd feel about dating a struggling college student, or even now (while I'm in college), I wouldn't date someone who has graduated and is already stable with a good career.

[iamevan]

I know this was asked to the ladies but I thought I could offer a reasonable opinion. I've dated a number of older women so I can talk from my experience. It's not really a whole lot different than dating anyone else. I think older women do expect a certain amount of maturity from a younger guy. If you still chuckle when someone says "chicken breast", this probably rules you out. It's fine to be a young man. But be a man and not a boy. It's not a problem if you still have passion for things. The whole youthful exuberance is liked. You will be looked at as maybe someone fun to be with. You can't get too lost on trying to act more grown up than you are. Know how to talk and more importantly how to listen. Be open about how good she looks. Many times the woman may be divorced or simply hasn't felt attractive. She should know she is in your eyes. By all means be sincere. Yes you still need to play flirting type games and joke and challenge her. Being younger is not a negative usually. You have to be able to challenge her, make her laugh, assert yourself as an equal and just show that you have a bit of patience. If things lead somewhere, act like you've been there before. All I mean is, if you kiss, don't think now is the time to take pull your pants off. lol You don't have to be perfect or be mr. nice guy or anything. It's just about being able to carry yourself well. Older women are amazing. They have so much more to say and are just usually more interesting. If something happens, don't worry about being nervous. Even though a woman may be older, she can be nervous too. To me the most important thing is to be able to carry on a conversation with the person. This is someone you may be interested in. If that's the case, then you should be interested in what they think and say. If you don't have any interest in what they think then really you shouldn't be with that person anyhow, unless you just wanted a notch on your bedpost. Most people are interesting if you let them be. Too often we are in a hurry and we miss out on the connection or the soul that a person has to offer. Take the time to know them a bit. But, you need to make it clear that your intentions are to go out with them. Don't beat around the bush about that. Be direct. Be a man about it. I tell the person exactly what my intentions are and tell them they can walk away anytime they like. Then to be difficult, a bit later i will say "i see that you haven't left.". It sort of cements the fact that they have some interest. I know that being younger makes it all intimidating. You don't have to be a success. But I do think they need to know that you have a plan. They need to see you have at least a bit of direction with where you want your life to go. If you dont' have any drive then they may as well date their pizza boy.

[SpottiOtti]

First of all, never ask a lady her age.

 

My boyfriend is five years younger than me, and for me, like the other women who posted, the age was really a non-issue. We click as people. I think if you happen to click really well with older women, something naturally will happen eventually. But by the same token, if you meet a 22-year old who you click with, don't pass her up just because she hasn't "lived" as much and isn't as "experienced" as an older woman.

 

What drew me to my man is that he is an incredibly sweet and caring person. What keeps me around is that he has goals in life, makes me laugh, listens to me, and shares his thoughts with me. That he is also incredibly interested in what will keep me sexually satisfied is icing on the cake.

[Lamour detruit]

First of all, never ask a lady her age.

 

My boyfriend is five years younger than me, and for me, like the other women who posted, the age was really a non-issue. We click as people. I think if you happen to click really well with older women, something naturally will happen eventually. But by the same token, if you meet a 22-year old who you click with, don't pass her up just because she hasn't "lived" as much and isn't as "experienced" as an older woman.

 

What drew me to my man is that he is an incredibly sweet and caring person. What keeps me around is that he has goals in life, makes me laugh, listens to me, and shares his thoughts with me. That he is also incredibly interested in what will keep me sexually satisfied is icing on the cake.

 

And just how old exactly are you ?..........had to be done.

 

Anyway, I believe age differences are more about the stage of life you're in than the actual age difference. For many it is hard if one of them is just a college student, while the other has an established career and what have you. That right there can make it a difficult match. Just depends on the individual really if they are up for it.

[MD Geist]

First of all, never ask a lady her age.

 

 

I love just knowing but not asking. It was like the current girl I fancy, she is 29 years old. When I met her I knew she was past 25 but in all honesty she looks like your typical 20-24. She's beautiful. She's smart and she's sexy. That wouldn't stop me. The only thing that does is she's a little difficult to talk with because she has a force field around her but in all the small chat we've had we've had great conversations, I could probably talk to this girl all day, all night if I could.

 

Okay back on track........

 

But the whole thing about women is never ask her age or weight.

 

The way I see it is it doesn't matter, as long as she looks great and you like what you see it doesn't matter what it says on the ID about date of birth or weight.

 

I just think older girls are just awesome people to have in your life regardless if you going to date them, have fun with them or just have them around because you can learn so much from them.

 

BTW, are you 30? Thats my guess for your age and your boyfriend is 25 I bet.

[MD Geist]

Does flirting with an older girl still work?

 

I know they like things to be a little different and up front.

[mattj]

I'm not really sure that girls between 25 and 30 really even count as 'older' in it's full sense, other than perhaps being older than you. My girlfriend is 5 years older than me (6 this weekend), and yet if anything she's much more childish than me sometimes! (and certainly looks younger than me half the time)

Basically it seems to me that people change very little from their early to late 20s, and so basically anything that works then works now. As always, personality and personal taste would sureley have a bigger impact than age.

[MD Geist]

Women at a later age do think a lot different than those at a younger age.

 

I love them for that but dating them is going to be difficult. Especially at my age trying to date a girl who's 27 although I connect with them with much easier its just going to be hard to convice her that I geneually want to date and be with her in a relationship and not just have her for sex.

[mattj]

I don't know, there's a much bigger age gap between me and my girlfriend, and age is rareley a problem for us. As far as I can tell people don't change all that much as they get older, only their situation in life. So assuming you have a job and a house there shouldn't be too much difference between you and her.

After all,if me, a 20 year old, can manage a 6 year difference then i'm sure 3 years at your age shouldn't be too different at all. Depends on the person in question though I suppose.

[MD Geist]

I have a job but not a house. That shouldn't matter anyways as long as I have a roof over my head I should be fine.