jim355 Posted December 13, 2009 Share Posted December 13, 2009 Don't know where else to post this but here. Maybe you can give me some advice? I was just wondering how long after a break up it takes before you get some interest in dating again? I just broke up with a girlfriend of 2 years a week ago. (there will be no chance of reconciliation). I was a a bar tonight and it just felt so weird because there were a lot of attractive single girls there (some even showing interest in me) and I had no real interest in pursueing any of them. I just feel lost, kind of in limbo because I know I am not getting back together with her, yet I can not move forward either. Anyone else been in this place before? Maybe I am just panicing but it just feels so weird to be in this place, very alone and sad but yet not being able to move on... Link to comment
flyer Posted December 13, 2009 Share Posted December 13, 2009 I know exactly how you do feel, it does take time to move on. It is still very early days for you, give it time, you will know when it feels right to gain some interest in other potential women again. Link to comment
Ivory_Tower Posted December 13, 2009 Share Posted December 13, 2009 Yes, I think that after a serious relationship ends its totally normal to not be ready to date again for a while. For me, it takes about six months to fully get over things and be ready to date (even if its casual) again. The point it---you aren't over it yet, and may not be for a while. Link to comment
Cminor7th Posted December 13, 2009 Share Posted December 13, 2009 That place is not a fun place my friend. After I broke up with my ex, I too had women become more interested in me... But to actually make the effort took me 5-6 months.... During that time frame, all the restraint I had was gone, and I just tagged every girl I could find, and I'm not talking about facebook tagging either.... So you will have different range of responses, pity, despair, anger, but then you move on... Link to comment
moondog627 Posted December 13, 2009 Share Posted December 13, 2009 After my first major breakup, it took me about 9 months before I felt ready to date again. However, I held myself back with the healing process. This time around, having done the proper work, I feel like I'm just about ready to get back in the groove (after only 2 months and a more painful breakup). Still, I'm not looking for anything serious. I just love women and miss their company in general. Link to comment
HeartBrokn Posted December 13, 2009 Share Posted December 13, 2009 During that time frame, all the restraint I had was gone, and I just tagged every girl I could find, and I'm not talking about facebook tagging either.... Cminor7th, LoL dude that had me laughing. You know I have heard that from many people? It must be to satisfy that vacuum, maybe. But anyways I have been in a 10 year marriage, and after the breake up (emotional one) I felt the same way when I was around potential chickas, it's like you are a zombie. Link to comment
Ms Darcy Posted December 13, 2009 Share Posted December 13, 2009 I would say that it really depends on how you feel. But after a two year relationship, I would say you should give yourself at least three or four months to heal and see how you feel at that time. Link to comment
Ms Darcy Posted December 13, 2009 Share Posted December 13, 2009 During that time frame, all the restraint I had was gone, and I just tagged every girl I could find, and I'm not talking about facebook tagging either.... So you will have different range of responses, pity, despair, anger, but then you move on... I would advise against this - going out for indiscriminate physical interaction. You could hurt a lot of folks this way. Link to comment
Cminor7th Posted December 13, 2009 Share Posted December 13, 2009 Cminor7th, LoL dude that had me laughing. You know I have heard that from many people? It must be to satisfy that vacuum, maybe. But anyways I have been in a 10 year marriage, and after the breake up (emotional one) I felt the same way when I was around potential chickas, it's like you are a zombie. Yeah man, I was just really used to intimacy, and I had to find subsitutes for it and the pillow and heavy blankets weren't cutting it. I wasn't even a dog, or Werewolf.....I was Tiger Woods....just without the budget...and Ambien... Link to comment
petite Posted December 13, 2009 Share Posted December 13, 2009 I am not even thinking about dating now. We just broke up this week and I can't even imagine myself having coffee with another male let alone date. I feel like it's either him or nobody. Link to comment
Cminor7th Posted December 13, 2009 Share Posted December 13, 2009 I would advise against this - going out for indiscriminate physical interaction. You could hurt a lot of folks this way. I was in pain, so I took on risky behaviors....you live and you learn... Link to comment
Salicia Posted December 13, 2009 Share Posted December 13, 2009 Well, to answer your question, it solely depends on how long a person takes to move on and start dating other people again. Some people can rebound just like that and for some people, it may take years for them to start actively dating again. I'm sorry about your break-up. I know those things are hard to endure when they happen. Just take some time out for yourself and hopefully you can move forward. I hope things go better in the romance department for you in the future. Link to comment
jim355 Posted December 13, 2009 Author Share Posted December 13, 2009 Thanks everyone I am going to have to take some time to heal. At this point even if I got a date with the girl of my dreams I would not know it becasue I would still be thinking of my last relationship. And that is not fair to either party. I think I will know when the time feels right and I am not depressed over the break up. Link to comment
petite Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 Seems like my ex will be on the lookout to NEXT me. I guess we are all different. I can't even imagine dating anyone. Link to comment
arcadefire Posted December 14, 2009 Share Posted December 14, 2009 Thanks everyone I am going to have to take some time to heal. At this point even if I got a date with the girl of my dreams I would not know it becasue I would still be thinking of my last relationship. And that is not fair to either party. I think I will know when the time feels right and I am not depressed over the break up. You sound wise. Best of luck in your healing process! Keep yourself busy, don't worry about dating quite yet. You have plenty of time to date. Link to comment
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