:( down night. Suggestions needed....

[zoe111]

The ex wants to be friends -I would love to be friends with him but everytime he speaks to me on the phone etc i just end up crying and craving him I cant tell him i dont want to be his friend till it suits me really, can i? I havent met him yet since it all although he would like too this week, so worried it could go horribley wrong and take me right back to day 1 of break up...but i dont want him out of my life for good either! but i feel bad expecting him to stay around for friendship if i say i cant handle talking to him now etc (it has been 2 weeks of NC before this but we split up while back)

 

Too make matters worse he has a mad ex girlfriend (with serious issues, she was the one he also was cheating on when with me) who hates me and has threatend to do all sorts (she has mental health issues) to me. So now im scared to be seen with him incase she thinks its more...when this time he wouldnt be lying to her it really would be just friends!

 

Do i say no and keep going strong like i was before he suggested meeting up for a cuppa or meet him once as friends (hope we dont see her) and trial it out. Guess im thinking ill prob end up regretting it either way Oh...why cant i have a simple love/social life for once!

[stingray]

Hey,

 

I understand how you feel right now because I have been through something awfully similar. I struggled for months until I was finally strong enough to let her know that I think it was best if she gave me some space. As long as you do it in a really friendly way they will understand. Let him know how much pain you are in and what happens just be completely honest.

 

Do what would make you feel better in the end and what would make you happy in the LONGTERM. That is the easiest and least painful option!

 

If you need to talk to anyone you can always PM me....

 

Good luck!

[ebik]

totally in the same boat! i would love to be able to be friends with my ex but i really dont think it would be a good idea. i want to see him yet i know i shouldnt! im so conflicted!! would be sad to throw away 4 and a half years of memories and life you shared with someone just to never see or talk to them again.. maybe with time we can be friends with our ex's but space is for the best at this time!

[Rob1000]

Yeah I'm the same. My and ex and I broke up 7 months ago. We haven't seen each other since (only 5 mins on the phone in all that time). I'd love to be friends at some stage but right now it's way too difficult for both of us. Time and more time is what you need. I can assure you that trying to be friends with him now will only delay your healing and keep you from moving on to your next relationship.