Post here instead of contacting your ex!

[einsteins_girl]

It's been over two months since the breakup now. Over two months since we've had any contact. I thought I was doing well, but these last couple of weeks have been worse than any of the time that came before them. I'm doing things - spending time with family and friends, going to the gym, working really hard at work, but everything feels... empty. I smile, but it's just movement; it isn't real. I think I try to deny most of the time how much I miss you, but then these cracks start to appear, and I feel the pain leaking out and slowly taking me over.

 

I don't know how to live my life without you. Not because I'm scared of being alone. It turns out I'm pretty good at being alone. Not because I don't think I'll ever be able to find someone. There have already been two men who have expressed interest, but I don't have any desire to be with anyone else.

 

I don't know how to live my life without you because I think I was saving my love for you, and I gave it to you over the course of the past six years, and now it's not mine anymore. It's yours, always. My heart is yours now, and I'm left empty without it. I'm not sure how to go on without you. You. You. Always you.

[potty46]

I just want to be with you and I can only hope once you get passed your roadblock you want that to. But everyday this is fading and I'm so scared it'll be too late.

[LSgirl]

Today is Day 24 NC since the breakup. I cried for a bit when I heard the song "one headlight" by the Wallflowers. For some reason, I hear that song everywhere I go! I've heard it in 3 bars now and it sickens me. It bothers me because that was the song you were listening to the night you got drunk and started reminiscing about your ex-fiancee. That song is about being stuck in the past when you should be moving forward and not being there for her when you should have. I bet you are STILL reminiscing about her rather than mourning over our relationship. I should have not overlooked the red flags for over a year. I kept telling myself within time you would come around and forget about her. You guys kept in touch even though she moved accross the country with the person she cheated on you with! You have a lot of issues and demons and it wasn't fair to project that when I was around. I had to watch you be in pain, how dare you stay in a relationship with someone when you aren't over somebody. It'll be almost a month since we have spoke, and I can't tell you how I proud I am that I have not reached out to you. I'm glad that I got out now before we dated for 2 years and for what, nothing but a short-lived experience until you went onto your next journey without me. How selfish and arrogant of you! I hope you are in pain, and I hope you realize what you put me through and what I even allowed myself to go through. I take blame in this for staying in it as long as I did, but you hurt me so much! Thank you for finally being honest in the end and telling me you never saw a future with me. You should not be with anyone. You make me sick, I'm disgusted by your motivations and you deserve to suffer for as long as you made me go through it. You're pathetic and I'm disgusted with myself for thinking you were better than that.

[Lightning87]

I don't think I'll ever get over you. You are the only man I have ever truly loved and I am so sad that we didn't work out. The thought of never being with you again is painful. I love you xxxxxxx

[Emma8]

I know you still love me. say its a big mistake. say it.

[typingbug]

i miss you so much,i thought we could get over this difficultly ,you said you loved me and didn't want to lose me ,why did you let your fear make it happen.i feel so lonely without you .how come you aren't missing me wanting to hold me.missing you so much .i thought it would be us against the world together.

[Snowy]

Guys, don't cave in.

 

I had the worst night 6 days ago. I really really really wanted to contact my ex, but I held off the temptation.

 

Now I'm feeling as good as ever.

 

Hang in there. Time will heal everything.

[Daisy88]

Screw you for sending me your lame ass "hope you have a good day" text this morning.

 

I think it's really immature of you to keep contacting me even though I've specifically told you I don't want ANY contact with you unless it's in in regards to the money I owe you. You have a GF right now & so you clearly aren't interested in reconciling with me so you need to BACK THE HE** OFF and leave me alone!

[soybeans]

I feel something finally clicking inside of me. Instead of convincing myself that you might miss me or still love me, I'm telling myself that you want nothing to do with me. Because I never got closure, I'm creating my own. In this case it's me imagining you telling me that you fell out of love with me, you no longer want the relationship and you want to move on for good. I have to do this. It's probably the way you feel anyway. And if it isn't for some reason, then I will now adapt that mindset myself.

 

I had a tough time yesterday. I'm fed up with feeling this way. Either I keep living with this pathetic hope or I get strong and start living my life new and fresh.

[WNP2]

Day 5 NC... feeling like crap.. glad i found out you just gold digging B****!

[brokenheart13]

I will be cutting you out of my life today. I want you to know it is not because I hate you but because I am still in love with you and I can't do this anymore. I hope you realize that you want to be with me before it is too late.

[Musical77]

So yesterday was the date we first started chatting - 22nd March. I remembered it but I'm sure it passed you by. Never did I expect to fall for you in the way I did.

 

After last week's major setback I've been much better this week (the usual up and down emotions, but only cried twice in last 7 days - yay!). But tonight, tonight I just feel exhausted. I'm doing so much work on my own issues, exploring them with the counsellor and reading and reading and reading about it all. I feel good to finally be addressing these things.

 

How will I ever meet someone I feel such a connection with T? I just feel scared that I won't and I've spent too many years on my own to want another couple of decades stretched out ahead of me as a singleton. I've been single all my life. It's all I knew till I met you. I'm scared that I won't be able to deal with all that a relationship requires - I fear feeling overwhelmed, engulfed and yet I crave that intimacy, that special friendship, the affection, laughs and kisses and cuddles.

 

I am so in a different place to how I was a few months ago, but truth be told, I still miss you. It's so unfair that you don't miss me. I'm such a special person and you know it.

 

Oh well, onwards and upwards!

[playstheblues]

No message? You don't want to even tell me? how can things like this happen and we still have no contact. I suppose that is how its going to be. This was so important to both of us, but I guess, for you, it's less important that erasing me and acting like I never existed. I existed and I am still here. You can't wipe the last 9 years even if you want to. IM STILL HERE.

 

I get it. I need to draw a line - because 'we won't be getting back together' . Easy for you to say. You don't seem to able to draw a line when you see me. Your line is blurred but you expect mine to be clear. Enjoying this Saturday? Without me? Do I even enter your thoughts? Do you ever think of me? Dream of me? I don't even go half an hour without you. You're always there. Here. Wherever I am. All I want is for you to contact me, for you to realise what you've done and how much time we've wasted being apart. Instead- you carry on with your decision. How can you live with it? Part of me still can't believe what you've done. Part of me knows it's real and part of me wants to wake up and this all to be part of some sick sad dream that went on for too long.

[Daisy88]

DAY 1 NC:

You sent me five texts today. That seems a bit much considering we both know you have a girlfriend. I don't know if things are rocky right now with her or what the deal is but clearly you don't want to be with ME. So, just eff off & leave me the hell alone please. Thanks.

[EmmaB78]

You are a narcissistic * * * * * * * , and I can't believe all of the stuff I put up with from you. Who did you think you were dating here? Another one of your desperate little 20-something divorced waitresses with no other options? Just a reminder: I make more money than you. I have a better career with you. I am better than you. You are LUCKY that I condescended to date you at all. You met your match when you met me, pal, and you're just mad that you couldn't defeat me. Your best friend, who you told me I had offended, is trying to hook up with me. What stupid choices you have made in who you trust and who you let go. Go back to the women who will dance the little dance of praise for you. You wouldn't know a real woman if she slapped you in the face. Which, man oh man, I wish I would have done. The second you pushed me is the second you deserved a taste of your own damn medicine. I regret that I didn't push you back. I guess all I get from this mess is the knowledge that YES, I am better than your loser exes you compared me to, better than your best friend that is trying to hook up with me now, and, most importantly, better than you.

[playstheblues]

I miss you today. I really miss you. Everything is reminding me of you and this is what my life is going to be like. I hate this reality.

[Snowy]

DAY 1 NC:

You sent me five texts today. That seems a bit much considering we both know you have a girlfriend. I don't know if things are rocky right now with her or what the deal is but clearly you don't want to be with ME. So, just eff off & leave me the hell alone please. Thanks.

 

Well said.

[blueplanet22]

I love the fact of when you get to the stage I am, and you have no desire to say anthing to them, you feel nothing. I hope you all get there soon {{{hugs}}}.

 

One thing is certain, you WILL get there.

 

x

[Lightning87]

I woke up again this morning hoping this was all just a bad dream. I lay last night listening to our song and cried my eyes out to try and get rid of some of this pain I'm feeling.

 

I wonder whether you lied when you said you didn't want to break up, where really you just didn't have room for me in your life anymore but didn't want to be so blunt and tell me that.

 

I really miss you so much today, I hate not having good night texts or text saying love you. I just want you back

[Lightning87]

I want a house to fall on your head.

 

Sorry if this is out of order, but that really made me laugh. Not meaning to take away from you any pain you may have right now but that really cheered me up.

 

I hope so too on your behalf

[playstheblues]

Sorry if this is out of order, but that really made me laugh. Not meaning to take away from you any pain you may have right now but that really cheered me up.

 

I hope so too on your behalf

 

 

I actually just laughed really loud reading that so I don't think it's out of order. Sometimes a laugh in the midst of all this pain really is necessary.

[Havok20]

I still don't understand in the end how I cried for you as hard as I ever had for anything in my life because I cared. You sat there and told me you still loved me and you just needed space and how you held and comforted me as I cried praying everything would be ok. I told you I would get help for my issues and I am now I am getting better, I am not the same person you began the relationship with I am 10X a better person now... But you fail to see that because you are so wrapped up with your ''New relationship'' to give a care in the world about me. Thanks for the knife now only in my back but my heart as well.... I hope one day you realize how much I loved you and cared and wanted us to work everything out...

[Fraggle]

It'll be 7 weeks tomorrow since you told me a flick had switched and you were no longer wanting to be in the relationship and that you did want to have your kids w me.

 

Those words hit me so hard I nearly stopped breathing. The last 7 weeks have been the toughest thing I've ever had to endure bar the death of my mother.

 

You have at least not tried to contact me, but why would you? I do miss you even after your hateful words and inability to sit down and talk to me before rejecting me and throwing 9 years away....

 

Part of me hopes you'll realize the mistake you have made but I doubt it as you could never admit that you were wrong and I guess you ll continue to do so for the rest of your life. I doubt many of your relationships will last because of this. I hope for your sake you take some time out and work on yourself but I seriously doubt it.

 

For all your horrible words and warped morals I still miss you and for that I hate myself at the moment. I hope that as I work on me and I go through my therapist sessions I will become a better and stonger person who deserves better than you x

[dave1981]

Its coming up for 12 weeks since you broke my heart

 

I have not been able to get over you, its so hard not being able to talk to you each day, or being able to hear about your day

 

I dont have much hope of you getting back together with me, I still dont know the real reason you broke up with me.

 

I wanted kids with her, I was thinking of proposing to her

[Dcof]

My darling. You have left me. If only my attempts to change your mind worked. If only i could turn off this pain, this longing, yes this sadness. If only i could turn back time. And because i cannot, if only I could stop caring, longing, hurting. If only I could be vengeful and angry, but i cannot. Instead i love more! I wish the words of the following sad and beautiful poem by Pablo Neruda, were true for me. But they are not.

 

 

if I look

at the crystal moon, at the red branch

of the slow autumn at my window,

if I touch

near the fire

the impalpable ash

or the wrinkled body of the log,

everything carries me to you,

as if everything that exists,

aromas, light, metals,

were little boats

that sail

toward those isles of yours that wait for me.

 

Well, now,

if little by little you stop loving me

I shall stop loving you little by little.

 

If suddenly

you forget me

do not look for me,

for I shall already have forgotten you.