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I'm not sure if it's the weather or what, but I really am bummed. I wish you'd send a text asking to hang out and see a movie. Our last planned date was to go see a scary movie at the local drive-in. However, that was before you decided to vanish and get weird about falling in love again. It really stinks, finding someone you mesh SO well with, to have it fall apart much too soon.

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8 days since I wrote you that email. Put myself out there because you wouldn't.

You have all these young girls befriending you on Facebook. Sorry but younger doesn't mean better. Wish I could delete you and everyone associated with you on Facebook, but I don't want you to know I am thinking of you.

Yesterday I had a date. He is really sweet and manly and generous... We shall see, maybe he will help me forget you.

I can't believe you can just walk back into my life, stir everything up and disappear again after all these years. Well it has. This was your second chance and you are blowing it. There won't be a third.

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Your really suck with your mixed signals and games. You yelled at me for playing games towards the end of our relationship but this is SO much worse. One minute you want me, telling me all this stuff and now it's like were strangers again? Really? You don't just get to come into my life when you please. Spend time with me and my friends, make me think you want me again, kiss me, take me around your family and then just with out so much as a word or a reason why drop me AGAIN! You think I would learn when it comes to you. I hope this time I finally do!

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Saturday night... two weeks ago we were out having fun like almost all Saturday nights for the last 4 years... This is my second saturday night at home, thinking of you and your sudden decision. Where are you? are you out ith friends? other girl? having fun at a place we used to go together?

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It sickens me, your friend texting me and flirting all the time. I know he wouldn't do so without your approval. You really don't care.

 

It all reminds me of when we first started going out. You always texted me and invited me to dinner with you. I was always insisting to everyone that we were just friends. Then that one day you started holding my hand, and I told you I didn't want to date you. I didn't want to ruin our friendship. For a week, we were apart. It was one of the worst weeks of my life. I missed you so much.

 

You had missed me too, and when we ran into each other, you kissed me. I finally gave in.

 

You swore you'd never hurt me. "This is it," you said. "Isn't it strange to think we'll never date again?" Soul mates. True love.

 

All of it, lies. Why did you pursue me if you weren't over her? Why did you keep insisting if you were just going to drop me the minute she came back?

 

I feel so used. I feel like most of the people in my life just want something from me, and as soon as they get it, they're out the door. Sometimes I just want to scream, "I'm a person too! I have feelings!" But they don't care.

 

I heard a theory once that people do whatever they can to maximize their own success no matter what that means for the people around them. Maybe it's true.

 

I want to give you back your love letters. I want to throw them in your face. I want you to admit that you were just saying pretty things to get what you wanted from me, but now you're done with me. You have no use for me anymore. You don't care about what happens to me, not even a little.

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Who I was kidding thinking that going back on that dating site would help me get over you. The thought of letting anyone new into my life disgusts me at this point. I don't want someone new. You knew me inside and out, all my quirks and our inside jokes. I don't want to get to know someone else. I want our old times back.

 

I glance at my phone hoping to hear it ring and see your picture pop up. But I know it won't happen. Where are you tonight? Are you with her? Out having drinks somewhere, having fun and laughing? You probably don't even miss me. You're probably not even phased one bit. I can't even focus on studying, I just want to talk to you and be comforted by you. Tell you about my day and tell you how much I love you.

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Sooooooo Saturday night. A week gone by since I found out you were going out late at night...

A week ago I was crying for hours over you.

Tonight was GREAT went to the football game and I couldn't believe how many guys were checking me out! It felt WEIRD! I am not used to that, I am used to feeling worthless and unhappy and down!

So ...you are deleting a bunch of boards you go to, and your friend deleted his Facebook...kinda weird...

I mean I get why you would delete stuff but why is your BF deleting HIS facebook that doesn't make sense??

Did you two realize you're gay lovers? Haha...you made him get rid of his FB cause you hated it so much? Haha...

 

I'm sure you are going out tonight. Who knows maybe You're getting laid. I should get hurt by that but surprisingly I don't care. Now last night I got super sad and thought about you for hours, but I knew it was just a feeling and emotion it was not a truth/reality...

I know that I will be OK!

 

It's weird...tonight I felt HAPPY...

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So wow yeah i pretty much find out your out at a movie with a girl at the very mall you and I met. I mean, how lame and low can you go?

I say this in all honesty. I don't want you back. Some other girl can put up with your abuse. I don't even care. I'm not even worried about it. I just hope God punishes you for your abusing women, more specifically me since I am the most recent victim, by giving you a HORRIBLE date. I hope it goes horrible I hope she's turned off by you I hope that you look ugly to her and nobody wants you. I hope God punishes you by making you lonely for a LONG TIME so you learn your lesson!

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Dear ( )

 

Ya know what...

Actually when you and I would go the mall all you would do is look at teenagers like 14-19 and it made me sick...youre a freaking pedaphile dude

Let some new girl put up with you!

 

When I was at that mall with you, this year you never wanted to hold my hand

You'd get P'D if I got some popcorn or something then you'd bi##$ at me for not getting you any after you told me you didn't want any

You would flip out at people for the slightest thing

You'd get hard if a hot chic came on the screen (yet NEVER hard for ME!)

We would leave and immediately you would walk in front of me so that you could check out other girls (more specifically, teenagers!)

 

Ya know, I thought of something, you never bought me Valentines gifts, birthday gifts and flowers or Mothers day gifts. I never got anything and I never complained ONCE like most girls would do because I wanted to be the perfect girlfriend and wife.

 

Do you remember in the beginning when i would get all dolled up for you? I'd do my hair, makeup and nails...cute little dresses with heels and I would proudly hold onto you even though I am sorry to say this but everyone I now says I am hotter than you. But I was so happy to be with you you're all I cared about. I would NEVER look at other men I would have felt too guilty about it and disrespectful

 

Do you remember how we would stop at the sunglasses place? I would buy you a new pair of Oakleys and we would go share pretzel bites...I WOULD FEED YOU them. I would even dip them into your cheese dude...who does that......................

 

We would go into the bookstore together and read books together

I always would be willing to go into YOUR stores but you NEVER wanted to go into mine...............

 

I would get ridiculed and called a "man pleaser" and a "tool" if I was like "hey I wanna go into abercrombie" or "hey I wanna get something from pac sun"

you always put me down..........

 

The first two years when we were just dating you would call me a "sl#$" and a "WH0$R" ...............you would tell me I just dressed up because I wanted men to look at me!

Here's the kicker. ...

If I dressed all hot for you I would get put down and ridiculed.

But If I dressed DOWN, you would IGNORE ME, walk in front of me and openly look teenage girls UP AND DOWN you may of well been licking your lips and screwing them right in front of me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

I remember one of our first dates. We went into the mall and you were carrying my bags, opening doors up for me, such a sweet guy, charming such a gent. Boy was I FOOLED COMPLETELY!!!!!!!!

 

You are truly an EVIL person

 

Trust me, I am getting more beautiful and more confident without you!!!!!!!!!!!

I believe when you see me again one day I will look 5x hotter and 5x more confident

I don't even care if you "regret" losing me. what if you don't. you're a socio path. You just hate me because I had too much spirit to break.

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I'm sorry but now that I am on a roll here......

And remembering our past

 

I am still mad about the time I come over and you have a pillow stuffed behind your bed post WHY would you need that?

I am still mad that a girl texted you when we were dating and said your name yet you still deny knowing who she was!

I am still mad about the transexual girl you were looking at on your computer the first couple weeks we met

I am still mad about the teenager you lusted over at Chilis the first couple weeks we met

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oh and im mad that you wanted a 3some with my best friend the first week i dated you and you thought she was hotter than me

but i thought you chose ME come to find out you just COULDNT date her cause she lived in another state! JERK!

in the meantime the guy i set HER up with, HE LIKED ME and was five million times hotter than you but I was a good person, not a cheater, and i would NEVER of dreamed of saying something Like "i want a 3some with him" or whatever..........i totally dissed him to be with you...............and all these years later u dont want me anyway!

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Tonight I actually had a lot of fun with my friends, and for the first time I felt comfortable with the fact that you won't be in my life anymore. I know two of those guys like me... and I was wishing that you were the one going crazy over me. I must admit that unfortunately I still miss you.

 

It kind of made me feel good when a friend said that my ex "must be crazy" for letting me go (haha). Simple things like that help me feel better about myself after how worthless you made me feel. What you did was really low.

 

I want you out of my mind completely so I can finally move on.

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All I have to say now is ************************************************** I can't believe I was dumb enough to use this email addy to write you and your friend and then have this account set up. I can't even believe I did that for reals. All I can say is, everything was true, you're still a cheating, womanizing sociopath. But your penis isn't small, so don't worry about that.

Getting caught doesn't justify your abusive actions against me at all.

It's just humiliating to me, that's all..and I look dumb for getting your friend involved. I really feel bad about that. He's all that you have.

 

Ya know, I've gotten hit on in the last few weeks but I turned peeps down because I was pining for you and a masochist I guess. But now that I know you've been reading my posts and probably laughing your butt off at me, I realize I'm a fool and I have to move on now. Doesn't mean I will get married again, I don't believe in that not at this age! We've had 2 marriages by our ages and it's nothing to be proud of. Again, you probably wouldn't understand anyway because you don't believe you did wrong. You still have an inflated sense of self worth.

But anyway, to save me from further mortification I move on tonight. No more messages on divorce and healing. Doesn't mean I will rly go jump in the sack, but I should def move on and try to find someone to love me and someone whose shoulders I can cry on and who will hold me.

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i really really miss you. sometimes i think that it was the best thing to do, but most of the time i really think you did a mistake. i miss our dinners, watching series with you, to lay in your arms. it breaks my heart! i cant picture me with anyone else than you. and im soo freakin scared that you are having a great time now, i want you to be hurt, i want you to regret making this decision and i want you to feel bad for hurting me so bad!

 

i want us to be friends, and i need my friend now to move on. you said you really wanted that as well, so why dont u answer me when i write to you on facebook?

f*** i hate being dumped. i hate this!

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